desperate

angiegladwyn

Registered User
Jan 25, 2010
2
I promised dad to look atfer mum but she has gone so bad this last 6 mths she is now in a home. Because she was so agitated and crying all the time she was put onto diazepam 1mg.We think she is having TIA's so not sure if the deterioration is diazapam or her physical condition. As i am a trained nurse I am expected to have all the answers but I haven't! anybody got advice on the diazepam, the doctors do not seem to see her as I do.ang
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
Hi Ang

First of all, don't beat yourself up about your mum being in a hope. You are sticking to your promise to your dad, your mum is having the best care possible. Very few of us manage to keep loved ones with dementia at home right to the end, and if you're working, you've done the best thing in seeing that your mum has 24/7 care.

I can't say what has cause the deterioration in your mum, but it could well be TIAs. All you can do is put your trust in the doctors, and rely on them to do their best. My John had diazepam with no ill-effects, but what suits one person doesn't necessarily suit another.

Please take care of yourself, and don't feel bad. No-one understands the ins and outs of this disease, and why different people react in different ways.

Keep in touch with us, you'll find lots of support.

Love,
 

hazytron

Registered User
Apr 4, 2008
1,167
SOUTH LAKES
Hi Ang,

You could have been writing your post for me!
I am currently battling against my own guilt and feelings of inadequacy because I am hoping the "professionals" will take over the care of my Mum. The care that I can offer Mum is no longer sufficient. I am sure you will have done all that you can, you will have kept your promise to your Dad and you will have done your best for your Mum.
Others on this wonderful site will be along to offer more advice but for now, be kind to yourself!
Take care and keep on sharing your concerns with us.
Regards Hazel
 

Bronwen

Registered User
Jan 8, 2010
602
81
Bristol
TIS's

Hi Ang...I have just been through 4 terrible days and nights with my husband and the medical opinion is that he has had a mini stroke.or even series of mini strokes..resulting in complete state of anxiety, wandering and not sleeping. Eventually an emergency dr called in the middle of the night and gave him diazapam ..as a result of which my husband slept the rest of the night, most of the following day..came to for some tea only to go back to sleep again and then slept in bed until 5 am this morning...As much as it gave me some rest I wasn't happy about him sleeping so much.. but the anxiety and wandering seems to have passed but he still confused and sleepy.

I just don't know what the answer is..wish I did.

Take care..you are doing a wonderful job
love Bronwen
 

Flower_fairy

Registered User
Jan 22, 2010
39
Lancashire
Hi,
Although the dose of Diazepam is half the usual dose it can be that it is masking other symptoms (as it is sedating it can mask the symptoms of a stroke). If you feel your mother is over sedated then speak with the doctor and ask for it to be reduced and stopped and an alternative explored. I suppose you have to think if it has stopped the anxiety and agitation she was having if this is the lesser of two evils? Have a chat with the doctor and see if there are any less sedating options available.

Hope this helps xx
 

Winnie Kjaer

Account Closed
Aug 14, 2009
2,011
Devon
The body needs rest after a mini stroke, and that is what they are getting now, The diazepam helps but even without it, they would probably be sleeping a lot, some people recover within 48 hours after a TIA, my husband has had several but never recovers fully afterwards. A mini stroke causes additional brain damage to what was there already. Discuss with his GP or consultant when and how to reduce the medication. Take care
 

Padraig

Registered User
Dec 10, 2009
1,039
Hereford
Medication

I know nothing about medication, except like everything in life they have an up and down side. I came to ask why? What is the reason for medication?
When my wife first was admitted to hospital with a fractured arm after a fall, the first question I was asked: "Do you want her resuscitated?" Each time I visited her she was asleep. Often I attempted to wake her in order to walk her for feared of her losing the ability to walk. I was in dispute with the staff on this matter. A doctor calmed me down and assured me that she would be OK to walk again. One month later she was discharged in a wheelchair!
She entered a respite center for a week where the staff knew her as a very quiet gentle person. The Matron asked :"Why was your wife given Temazepan ( have I spelt that correct?)" Imagine my shock and anger to learn that it was a sedative. "Your upset? so am I." she said. I phoned the hospital to complain: "You people told me that you were walking my wife. If you were you must have been sleep walking her!"
That was more than 9 years ago, my wife passed away over 2 years ago. I trust things have improved significantly since then.
With your knowledge I'd be inclined to work with the staff as you know the patient best. I wish you well.
 

Flower_fairy

Registered User
Jan 22, 2010
39
Lancashire
Hi Padraig,
This is so common on medical wards as they see a diagnosis of dementia and automatically think they are going to be a problem. It really is uneccassary and so wrong. It is alsowrong they they seem to have hidden this from you whist she was on the ward despite having conversations with you about her sleeping. This is completely unacceptable, obviously nothing can be done now but I am glad you stood your ground in trying to get her walking on the ward, you should have been supported in this and not "told of" as such.
xxxx