Hi, I am new to this - was wondering if anyone has been through the new deputyship since October. My mum has vascular dementia and is in an EMI unit in a residential care home.
Until February last year she lived at home with my Stepfather as her main carer. He had lots of medical needs himself, including dialysis three times a week, during which time I became her carer together with his daughter in law and one care agency. Mum was taken into hospital with pneumonia and whilst in there broke her ankle. The PCT took her to a residential home until her cast came off which was an hour away for me and I was visiting nearly every day. They then said she needed to be in an EMI unit and could not stay there as she gets aggressive. Unfortunately during this time her husband's health deteriorated and he died in November.
I am now in the process of obtaining a deputyship which is proving to be a marathon task, I first met my solicitor in October and the application is only now getting finalised due to my stepfather's family, who had power of attorney for him, being reluctant to provide any of the financial information. This has now been passed onto the solicitor dealing with the estate who do not seem to be in any hurry to get things moving. Once my application is sent in how long will it take?
I made the decision to move my mother to a home nearer to me as I am the only visitor and have had to ask Social Services to loan the care home fees until my application is approved, but as I keep receiving unpaid bills for care home fees (£680 per week!) in my name the stress is now beginning to take its toll and I need to get things in order.
On top of this I will have to sell her home as she was the main beneficiary of the will, at the same time as having to deal with the harrowing visits to her at her new home where the only time she settles is when I am there, which in turn make me feel guilty when I leave her. She still cannot fully understand that she had lost her husband and asks for him continually.
I could go on forever about how everywhere you turn no one seems to be able to answer your questions - am I the only one who has been put in this situation! I don't think so. Social Services have been less than helpful and have on occasions put more stress my way, my mother's bank have refused all access to her accounts because she has dementia and have been even more unhelpful. For nearly a year now I have had to fund all her expenditure myself and feel as though this is never going to come to an end.
Sorry to ratter on but any helpful suggestions?
Until February last year she lived at home with my Stepfather as her main carer. He had lots of medical needs himself, including dialysis three times a week, during which time I became her carer together with his daughter in law and one care agency. Mum was taken into hospital with pneumonia and whilst in there broke her ankle. The PCT took her to a residential home until her cast came off which was an hour away for me and I was visiting nearly every day. They then said she needed to be in an EMI unit and could not stay there as she gets aggressive. Unfortunately during this time her husband's health deteriorated and he died in November.
I am now in the process of obtaining a deputyship which is proving to be a marathon task, I first met my solicitor in October and the application is only now getting finalised due to my stepfather's family, who had power of attorney for him, being reluctant to provide any of the financial information. This has now been passed onto the solicitor dealing with the estate who do not seem to be in any hurry to get things moving. Once my application is sent in how long will it take?
I made the decision to move my mother to a home nearer to me as I am the only visitor and have had to ask Social Services to loan the care home fees until my application is approved, but as I keep receiving unpaid bills for care home fees (£680 per week!) in my name the stress is now beginning to take its toll and I need to get things in order.
On top of this I will have to sell her home as she was the main beneficiary of the will, at the same time as having to deal with the harrowing visits to her at her new home where the only time she settles is when I am there, which in turn make me feel guilty when I leave her. She still cannot fully understand that she had lost her husband and asks for him continually.
I could go on forever about how everywhere you turn no one seems to be able to answer your questions - am I the only one who has been put in this situation! I don't think so. Social Services have been less than helpful and have on occasions put more stress my way, my mother's bank have refused all access to her accounts because she has dementia and have been even more unhelpful. For nearly a year now I have had to fund all her expenditure myself and feel as though this is never going to come to an end.
Sorry to ratter on but any helpful suggestions?