I am so sorry that you have all experienced such bad times with your loved ones who have dementia , when they go into hospital . I have experience of both , being the person delivering that care to patients and being the carer of my mum , who has vascular dementia . Maybe it's because of my mum that I encourage all my staff to treat patients with dignity and respect , regardless of their mental and physical capacity . I ensure we provide one to one with the patient , compiling a 'getting to know you ' booklet with the help of their family and carers. I encourage open visiting and make provision for family to stay the night if they so wish . There is an organisation called OPAC ( older people in acute care) , which is part of HEI ( Healthcare Environment Inspectorate) which monitor all care in hospitals . You can access these public reports . If you have any concerns then I encourage you to speak up , you are their advocate and need to speak on their behalf . I have been on the other side , being a relative when my mum was in hospital and I understand exactly where you are coming from . At first they didn't know who or what I was , which I was keen to keep up , but after my mum started to suffer I was forced to step in . I shouldn't have had to do that as every patient should be treated by knowledgeable, caring staff whose ultimate goal is to attend to the patients needs . For those people who can't provide that , should hang their heads in shame , as you never know when they may be at the receiving end of compassionless people . I have rambled on a bit but I wanted to assure you that there are people out there working in hospitals who do care about your loved ones and want only the very best of care delivered to them and apologise for those ones who who have brought the health service into disrepute ( nursing and medical) . . Best wishes to you all . Lou