Against everyone’s advice I brought my husband home in February after seven months in hospital after breaking his hip twice. He has advanced Parkinson’s, dementia and cannot walk at all.
He was refused fully funding three times, which no one at the hospital could understand why - I am appealing against the decision and can never understand why we cannot have full funding or even part funding at home, but that’s for another time.
I am strong minded and have been through some extremely tough times in my life, but this is by far the absolutely most horrendous experience ever. To those of you on a good day who think your loved one can come home - think again good people and remember how devious dementia can be. That person will turn and for absolutely no
reason put you through hell time after time and all you are doing is your best for them which they are totally incapable of understanding.
My heart truly goes out to you all, and I fully understand the heartbreak you experience. My mum has been in a nursing home for 13 years and is now palliative care with Alzheimer’s. I have been through every stage of this horrendous and harrowing journey with her although she has not known me for a long long time. She has enjoyed being in the nursing home and she is so loved by everyone there. They have however seen a totally different person from the one I know and this will possibly be the same for you all.
Take thought that the person you love to the very depths of your soul is still with you,
but just thinks and sees in a different mental form from you. Their reality is somewhat strange to us, but it is their reality and their world, one that we may only venture into from time to time.
For those of us left floundering, and wondering how did they get like this ? feeling guilty, taking every slight to heart, feeling knocked from pillar to post and still going to the ends of the earth and back, we have to stay strong and fight for them. They don’t understand how much they hurt us and scar our heart but we fight their corner and we do it because we love unconditionally that person and we will never give up on those who cannot speak and fight for themselves.
My love and prayers are for all xx
He was refused fully funding three times, which no one at the hospital could understand why - I am appealing against the decision and can never understand why we cannot have full funding or even part funding at home, but that’s for another time.
I am strong minded and have been through some extremely tough times in my life, but this is by far the absolutely most horrendous experience ever. To those of you on a good day who think your loved one can come home - think again good people and remember how devious dementia can be. That person will turn and for absolutely no
reason put you through hell time after time and all you are doing is your best for them which they are totally incapable of understanding.
My heart truly goes out to you all, and I fully understand the heartbreak you experience. My mum has been in a nursing home for 13 years and is now palliative care with Alzheimer’s. I have been through every stage of this horrendous and harrowing journey with her although she has not known me for a long long time. She has enjoyed being in the nursing home and she is so loved by everyone there. They have however seen a totally different person from the one I know and this will possibly be the same for you all.
Take thought that the person you love to the very depths of your soul is still with you,
but just thinks and sees in a different mental form from you. Their reality is somewhat strange to us, but it is their reality and their world, one that we may only venture into from time to time.
For those of us left floundering, and wondering how did they get like this ? feeling guilty, taking every slight to heart, feeling knocked from pillar to post and still going to the ends of the earth and back, we have to stay strong and fight for them. They don’t understand how much they hurt us and scar our heart but we fight their corner and we do it because we love unconditionally that person and we will never give up on those who cannot speak and fight for themselves.
My love and prayers are for all xx