1. Expert Q&A: Protecting a person with dementia from financial abuse - Weds 26 June, 3:30-4:30 pm

    Financial abuse can have serious consequences for a person with dementia. Find out how to protect a person with dementia from financial abuse.

    Sam, our Knowledge Officer (Legal and Welfare Rights) is our expert on this topic. She will be here to answer your questions on Wednesday 26 June between 3:30 - 4:30 pm.

    You can either post questions >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on the day.

  1. snuffyuk

    snuffyuk Registered User

    Jul 8, 2004
    188
    Near Bristol
    Hello.
    Not sure if the above is the correct word but my mother has begun waking in the early hours complaining about "something" in her room.
    She also "wakes" talking to her dog that died some years ago.
    Is this a common problem? Does it mean my mothers condition is deteriorating?
    Regards
     
  2. Sheila

    Sheila Registered User

    Oct 23, 2003
    2,259
    West Sussex
    Hi Snuffy, yes it is pretty common as far as my experience goes. Several people including my own Mum did it. Love She. XX
     
  3. Brucie

    Brucie Registered User

    Jan 31, 2004
    12,413
    near London
    Hi Snuffy

    It is always worth looking at all aspects.

    My Mum was diabetic and had more drugs than a Brixton dealer. Most of these mandated 'no alcohol'. Trouble was she also liked Baileys.

    When she had drink and medication, she would wake in the night and see her long-dead mother sitting at the bottom of her bed. Then they would have conversations.

    I have no experience of Jan having woken and spoken to anyone when she was at home with me.

    Best wishes
     
  4. Norman

    Norman Registered User

    Oct 9, 2003
    4,348
    Birmingham Hades
    Snuffy
    I have not had any experiences such as you describe.
    Lately Peg has asked me "who is that sitting there"?
    It is an empty chair and only happened twice so I will hope she is kidding me.but!!
    Best Wishes
    Norman
     
  5. Chesca

    Chesca Guest

    Snuffy

    Delusions? We all suffer from them from time to time - mine are of grandeur!

    Ask your Mum does she want you to get rid of the person in her room and if, yes, do so with a great flourish telling them not to show their face again. My Mum often sees people, sometimes in the wardrobe and I make a great show of opening it and throwing them out with a warning not to come back. In my experience there's little point in denying the presence, for Mum it is very real. It's just another entry into the world of dementia - and you can't fight it so go with it and play the game.

    Chesca
     
  6. Anne54

    Anne54 Registered User

    Sep 16, 2004
    147
    Nottingham
    My husband finds the things he sees at night very amusing, he makes a lot of noise laughing but he won’t tell me what they are, he says “don’t tell me you can’t see that” and points around the room, all I know is that they move.

    Anne
     
  7. TED

    TED Registered User

    Sep 14, 2004
    154
    Middlesex
    Hello
    Mum does it quite a lot talking to people who arent there
    I guess it's just part of being a) registered blind b) unable to collate her thoughts well.

    Usually go with it now and instead of asking her to explain what she can see tell her what is there .... even if I am lying about the dog as she passed away many years ago but I think judging my the smile on my mums face that she likes to remember her. We had a lot of fun when the dogs where at home.

    for instance mum will point down the hall and ask who or what something is .... I just say it's ok it's my bag / coat or whatever and that's all I have to do. I think it's just a reassurance they need (with apologies if this sounds patronising to anyone) I cant imagine what it's really like to lose your sight, I'm told its not as clear cut as when you shut your eyes. So they must keep seeing blurred images and shadows etc, and wonder what it is. Once told (or even lied to in my case) it's all ok. And I only use white lies when I need to, if there is something there then I will say so (Dad leaves the hoover in the hall it's often that too)

    Just another little something ... do you have pictures of your Dog ? We have some lovely ones which we've made bigger and put up in the hall. I think she can see them to some degree and as I said it's a happy time / event for mum to think about.

    Gotta go
    TED
     
  8. Sheila

    Sheila Registered User

    Oct 23, 2003
    2,259
    West Sussex
    Yes, I found that was the best way too, the line of least resistance. Take the "person" away as Ches says, or make it very simple etc. If you can avoid a confrontation it is better for all in the long run, although having said that, sometimes you can't avoid them. It's a difficult one. Love She. XX
     
  9. Norman

    Norman Registered User

    Oct 9, 2003
    4,348
    Birmingham Hades
    It is always best to avoid any sort of confrontation,you will never win the augument,or make sense of it.
    Given 5 minutes and it will all be forgoten by them, but not by you.
    My wife seems to talkabout things lately and then forget what she is talking about,again it is of no use trying to unravel the conversation,let it go.
    I try to live a quiet life as far as possible.
    Good luck
    Norman
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.