Hi, i am writing this from my husband and myself as its his parents i will be talking about.
My Father in law has Lewy Body Dementia and has got progressively worse over the last 6 months. He falls umpteen times a day, he does understand whats going on now and again, but most of the time is not aware. He is incontinent, needs help with his meals (he has to be fed)...basically every one of his needs has to met by my mother in law who is caring for him at home.
On Monday this week, my mother in law was rushed into hospital having have suffered a small stroke. It takes her upto 2 hours sometimes longer to get him upstairs to bed, thats if he is co operative.We have talked to her about getting either a home carer in to help or maybe even putting father in law into a care home.
He does not recieve any respite as he didnt even have a social worker when we started investigating all these possibilities.
We explained to mother that she needs a break from the caring or she will to find herself in need of someone caring for her.
We are now finding ourselves banging our heads against the wall as she is adamant that she needs no help at all to care for her husband.
We live over 300 miles away, and the only relative that lives nearby works, and has a young baby.
She does go out and leaves her husband alone, only to find when she gets home that he has fallen.
We dont know what else to do to try and make her realise that she can no longer do this to herself or her husband. She just will not listen.
We have told social worker everything, but mother in law says she doesnt want to see the social worker as she has now hired a cleaner and everything is going to be fine.
We understand that she wants to care for her husband as long as possible, and that she loves him and worries etc. But the time has come for her to think of her own health, before she has a major stroke or dies.
Any advice very welcome
My Father in law has Lewy Body Dementia and has got progressively worse over the last 6 months. He falls umpteen times a day, he does understand whats going on now and again, but most of the time is not aware. He is incontinent, needs help with his meals (he has to be fed)...basically every one of his needs has to met by my mother in law who is caring for him at home.
On Monday this week, my mother in law was rushed into hospital having have suffered a small stroke. It takes her upto 2 hours sometimes longer to get him upstairs to bed, thats if he is co operative.We have talked to her about getting either a home carer in to help or maybe even putting father in law into a care home.
He does not recieve any respite as he didnt even have a social worker when we started investigating all these possibilities.
We explained to mother that she needs a break from the caring or she will to find herself in need of someone caring for her.
We are now finding ourselves banging our heads against the wall as she is adamant that she needs no help at all to care for her husband.
We live over 300 miles away, and the only relative that lives nearby works, and has a young baby.
She does go out and leaves her husband alone, only to find when she gets home that he has fallen.
We dont know what else to do to try and make her realise that she can no longer do this to herself or her husband. She just will not listen.
We have told social worker everything, but mother in law says she doesnt want to see the social worker as she has now hired a cleaner and everything is going to be fine.
We understand that she wants to care for her husband as long as possible, and that she loves him and worries etc. But the time has come for her to think of her own health, before she has a major stroke or dies.
Any advice very welcome