Visited daycare canter today. wonderful place with loads of stimulation but I can't cope with taking her there so sister and sister in law doing the taking.
Tonight mum wanted to know whow will be "sleeping in her bed"
Snuffy (very tired) UK
One of the exhausting effects of doing something new for AD sufferers is fielding all the additional questions, isn't it? It becomes so wearing. I find that the mental exertion is so much more than the physical these days.
Once you have a routine established, then you can look forward to a really peaceful and relaxing day by yourself to recharge your batteries.
Hi Snuffy, great, let your relatives do this one, it will help you no end as the minute they take over, you have some time to unwind. Daycare is a lifesaver, for all of you. My mum started one day a week, but at the end of three years - 24/7 I had increased it day by gradual day to all five weekdays. It gave us just a few hours time apart, mum got to enjoy it in her own way and it gave me time for my family needs apart from mum. Go for it girl, it will give you strength to carry on the good work!
Love She. XX
I found it hard at first when Mum went to the day centre - although I explained it to her she was a bit disorientated at first, but she got used to it. By the time she went to a specialist dementia day centre she was very happy with the whole thing - she would be on the lookout for the minibus. She went on canal cruises, pub lunches, visits to the local country park etc, as well as the activities at the centre itself. She had a place at the second centre for five days a week, which later became six, as I work on Saturdays on a regular basis. It was such a relief to be able to go to work, or just relax on my day off, without worrying if she was wandering, and knowing that she was safe and not on her own. It certainly has made the last 18 months easier. Enjoy your free time - it helps recharge the batteries and takes some of the weight from your shoulders.
My mum in law has been going to day care for 5 months now and although she comes home a bit moody due to the lots of drop off on way home but she loves it, she goes three days a week and would probably go every day if she could. It is good for me as well as i get chance to catch up on jobs which need doing.
Your mum will soon get into the swing of it.
It's so refreshing to read such postive posts about Day Care Centres. I had no such luck with my parents unfortunately.
My parents hated going and sitting with a 'bunch of elderly souls' to play 'mindlessly, stupid games'. They derived absolutely no benefit from going there - mainly because they didn't want to participate and couldn't be bothered to talk to anyone. My father can be a bit patronising when he feels like it....
At the time that they were attending Day Care, it was my only chance to have a break, since I had no outside carers then. Eventually, I had to withdraw them from the Centre, which made life really difficult for me.
Dear Jude, my mum had a "false start" with day care about four years ago, I think she was still very much in denial and it was other people that were the problem, she was always very self willed, right to the end. I withdrew her and coped alone as you did. But, this is what I wanted to say, there may come a time when you can try again, I did, at first she muttered it was boring but I popped in a few times (unnanounced, bet they hated me!!) and she was happily joining in. I also found that if I asked her about it, she was always negative yet came home with little bingo prizes or flower arrangements etc. so I learn't to not let it get to me and persevered. She soon got used to it and became quite attached to the carers. Always sitting ready for the mini bus of a morning and eating a good lunch there etc. Love She. XX
There's a new AS care group just started up in Cranleigh in our local village and I'm going to take the oldies down for a few hours to see how they respond to it.
Just recently, my father has been complaining of feeling cut off from society. Almost all of the rellies of his age have died and I'm hoping that he and Mum may now be able to more easily chat to others of their own age.