1. CCM2013

    CCM2013 Registered User

    Feb 7, 2013
    32
    London
    We had dads funeral on the 19th at a Crematorium, and it was a lovely service - all tailored how we as a family thought dad would like. It was meant to be uplifting rather than too somber but it's hard to achieve this!
    It's now 2 days since and I thought I would feel better but I think I feel worse than ever and hate feeling tearful all the time and dreadfully unhappy. I miss my dad sooo much.


    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     
  2. Quilty

    Quilty Registered User

    Aug 28, 2014
    1,056
    GLASGOW
    Be kind to yourself

    Hello Friend, grief is a long and difficult thing, and it is different for everyone. I know its a cliché but time is the greatest healer. You need to give yourself time and not be afraid to be sad or cry.

    My Dad died of cancer 20 years ago this summer. I still miss him so much and think about him nearly every day. Your Dad is still alive in your memories. They might be painful now but they will sustain you. You will be able to remember him and only smile some day.
    Love Quilty
     
  3. LYN T

    LYN T Registered User

    Aug 30, 2012
    6,968
    Brixham Devon
    Hi CCM

    When my OH died in December I was devastated but made myself do all the funeral arranging etc. It sort of kept me going if that makes any sense. As soon as the funeral was over the real grief hit me. I'm sure that's what it must be for so many people. Some religions/cultures have the funerals within 24 hours of a persons passing-I now know why. The sooner you start to grieve and let out all the hurt the healthier it appears to be. Of course, grieving and the constant sadness is very energy sapping and you will cry a lot. Pete died 09/12/14 and I am still at the sobbing stage. Physically I have started to feel a bit better; but emotionally -well that will take as long as it takes.

    Be kind to yourself and acknowledge your loss. You have a way to go but we will be with you if you need to talk about your feelings.

    Wishing you strength

    Lyn T XX
     
  4. elizabet

    elizabet Registered User

    Mar 26, 2013
    224
    Southampton
    You will have been so busy thinking and planning the funeral etc that it has now hit you that your father has gone. Take things a day at a time, go easy on yourself, it is very early days yet and it is perfectly normal to feel upset-let it out, don't be afraid to cry and share memories of your father with your friends and family.
     
  5. CollegeGirl

    CollegeGirl Registered User

    Jan 19, 2011
    9,534
    North East England
    My mother in law died less than three weeks ago, CCM (not dementia related) and I too am quite tearful a lot of the time. And with you, it's your own dad that you've lost, and it's only been days since his funeral. I think we have to be kind to ourselves and not expect too much of ourselves. It's such a big thing to have happened. xx
     
  6. kenaidog

    kenaidog Registered User

    Apr 8, 2013
    164
    It can take a long time, i think the exceptance is the hardest part, they were here just a short while ago and now you cant see them anymore. It is hard to get your mind around that because you still feel like you can go visit and it had came such a big part of your life, my mams funeral was today and it felt unreal, is still feel like can just go see her when i want but of course i cant, it had made me think of some things in a different light however.
    I have learned i can deal with a lot of stuff and maybe i am braver than i thought after all. It takes a person to be brave and deal with all the things and emotions that come when your loved one dies. We know it has to come to everyone one but its still a shock to your system, which turns your world upside down.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.