Hi, I have posted prior to my visit to England (I live in France)and have just returned after 10 days visiting dad in hospital. Dad was taken to hospital recently after being found in a bad way at home (he lives alone). He was eventually diagnosed with Lewy bodies dementia and has been put on medication. We are not very happy with the type of medication but have to say it has improved his condition and he is more stable and does not suffer the horrendous hallucinations he was having. He is still confused and rambling and does still 'see things' but my dad is still in there and he said it was lovely to hear some laughter on the ward. I know he will deteriorate and even in his current state would be totally unable to fend for himself at home anymore. Unfortunately, having thought long and hard nobody is in a position to take dad home with them. Everyone is at work for long days and it would be dangerous for him to be alone for long periods ( he left the gas on in his old house), Luckily we were all able to attend the meeting with the various 'professionals' at the hospital. The first option was to send dad home with a care package and wait for the next 'incident'. Well the answer to them wouldn't be printable! We argued long and hard against that and so came the next option Sheltered Accommodation. I don't feel this is appropriate. The accommodation they are offering is a flat next to stairs which has an exit. Staff are not allowed to restrain and can only practice 'distraction techniques'. Dad was wandered at home but was never brought home by police (apparently a vital distinction as we cannot prove he did it). He also wandered in the hospital and they lost him one day. He was found in the maternity ward but apparently this is classed as 'institutional wandering'. Even after 6 weeks in hospital he couldn't find his way back to the ward although we took him for walks several times a day. The social worker has told the manager at the sheltered housing place that dad is not a wanderer. He cannot take care of himself and even with with care packages in place there is a period of 4 hours day when no staff are on site. This kind of accommodation is really for people who can live independently and make their own way about. Plus they have very mininal training in dementia care. We have found a residential care home that specialises in dementia which is near to my sisters who would visit regularly. This is obviously more expensive than the sheltered housing so is being discounted. Dad has no house and not much money so I think they would have to pick up the tab. They want dad out of the hospital so are throwing anything that is available at us even if it is not appropriate. I have had my fill of trying to argue with these people but surely they can't force us to choose something that we are not happy with. Does anyone have any similar experiences and actually won! This is so hard anyway coming to terms with gradually losing my dad to this horrible disease. We just want him to be safe and comfortable and leaving him anywhere is going to be hard enough. I thought I had calmed down but the anger and tears are back.
Trich
Trich