My mum has vascular dementia she lives at home with dad. I have carers in 4 times a day to help with mum but dad is becoming more aggressive towards mum. He doesn't talk to her anymore just constantly shouts and calls her names, she is getting agitated and doesn't understand what is going on. The other day a friend was calling on mum and saw dad hitting her . This friend rang me as they didn't know what to do. I confronted dad and he's saying he didn't do anything, I asked mum about it, but she denies anything happened but then she doesn't remember any thing that happens a few minutes ago. The carers are finding bruises on mums body quite regularly so I am believing that dad is hitting her. He drinks quite heavily and I'm thinking he loses control when he is drunk . I don't want to take mum away from an environment she knows and is happy in but on the other hand if dad continues hitting her he could cause more damage to her... should he be the one to move to a home as he would understand why he was going, mum would have no idea if it was her to be moved. This whole decision is so difficult. Please has anyone any words to help.