My Dad has early onset Alzheimer's. He's 60, still at work, but has damage in his frontal lobe, so socially he is often quite confused. He lives with my Mam who is an alcoholic. She had been sober for 18 months but I think my Dad's Alzheimer's is taking its toll and she's on a slippery slope. She's drinking all the time, but unless we get her some help, it's only a matter of time. Last night she told my Dad she was going to commit suicide if me and my sister didn't stop asking her to stop drinking. He got very upset and doesn't know what to do. Neither do we. It was an empty threat and was definitely the booze talking, but it's still very worrying that she'd even say that to him.
I live about 300 miles away from my parents and my sister (and her family). Both my sister and I have very young children and we both work, so we're really struggling to figure out what to do. We can't persuade my Mam to go to AA and she's had counselling from the NHS before, but that didn't work. Meanwhile my Dad can't understand why his wife is so different when she's had a drink. He gets it sometimes, but not other times.
We're also worried about her spending all their money. They have recently cashed in their private pensions and are sitting on quite a nest egg. Their house needs central heating and a downstairs toilet installed for when Dad gets worse, but Mam doesn't want to spend the money on anything practical. She says she would never put Dad in a home, but at the same time she won't let us plan how we might look after him at their house. We are so frustrated and frightened and don't know what to do.
I've talked to his Alzheimer's nurse today, but I'm not sure how helpful that is. It's such a complicated problem.
If anyone has any advice, I'd be really grateful for it.
D
I live about 300 miles away from my parents and my sister (and her family). Both my sister and I have very young children and we both work, so we're really struggling to figure out what to do. We can't persuade my Mam to go to AA and she's had counselling from the NHS before, but that didn't work. Meanwhile my Dad can't understand why his wife is so different when she's had a drink. He gets it sometimes, but not other times.
We're also worried about her spending all their money. They have recently cashed in their private pensions and are sitting on quite a nest egg. Their house needs central heating and a downstairs toilet installed for when Dad gets worse, but Mam doesn't want to spend the money on anything practical. She says she would never put Dad in a home, but at the same time she won't let us plan how we might look after him at their house. We are so frustrated and frightened and don't know what to do.
I've talked to his Alzheimer's nurse today, but I'm not sure how helpful that is. It's such a complicated problem.
If anyone has any advice, I'd be really grateful for it.
D