1. Expert Q&A: Benefits - Weds 23 October, 3-4pm

    Our next expert Q&A will be on the topic of benefits. It will be hosted by Lauren from our Knowledge Services team. She'll be answering your questions on Wednesday 23 October between 3-4pm.

    You can either post your question >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.

Dad seems very down and cross

Discussion in 'Younger people with dementia and their carers' started by Dawnb, Sep 13, 2005.

  1. Dawnb

    Dawnb Registered User

    Mar 2, 2005
    30
    dublin
    Hello All,
    In the last two or three weeks, dad seems to be very down, and if we go out for a walk at all he has a very cross face on him like as if he really does not want to be there. He is in the middle stages but recently conversation has got so muddled that he makes no sense whatsoever wheras before there were moments of clarity and comprehension. Could it be that it has taken a slight turn or has gone downhill in the last few weeks ? its so difficult to know what to do or how to help.
    He attends daycare twice a week, but alot of the people there are a lot oder than him ( he is 62, diagnosed at 56) and we wonder sometimes if that may cause him to be down, although he seems to enjoy it when he is there.
    Sorry for rambling, but its very hard when you are trying to cheer him up or have some form of conversation and you see how grumpy or cross he seems.
    they say that physical contact is one of the things the sufferer still likes as the time goes on but even that at the moment seems to annoy him.
    I told him I was his daughter the other day and that I was one of the twins to which he replied, " sure I havent seen the twins in years ! " you have to laugh other wise you would cry !!
    Any thoughts would be appreciated.
    Thanks for listening
    Dawn
     
  2. daughter

    daughter Registered User

    Mar 16, 2005
    824
    Hi Dawn,

    I'm not sure if the Daycare has anything to do with it, but I can very much relate to the grumpy-Dad-syndrome! My Dad was always a cheerful soul until AD. He was the one who would cheer up my Mum, when she was feeling down, making her laugh with something he'd said. Now, it's the other way round and Mum and I try to cheer Dad up but it can be very hard going.

    Often, Dad will complain about something and we will just agree with him about how awful it is. Then we change the subject as quickly as possible, "oh! look at that..." or "would you like a sweet?" That way, his moans have been listened to, and then the distraction seems to work. Not always though! Every one is different and it's probably best to avoid anything that annoys your Dad, including physical contact, as far as possible.

    I used to be concerned that I'd be upset when Dad couldn't remember my name but I knew it would happen eventually and somehow I accepted it. Sometimes Dad just thinks I'm a kindly soul kissing him hello and then, a short time later, he'll come right out with my nickname that he's always used - that feels wonderful!

    Hang on in there, you're right about the laughing! :eek:

    Best wishes,
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.