Dad not coping.

[Rosie]

Hello Everyone, My concern at the moment is my dad , my mum has AD + I posted a little while ago to say mum was poorly + that the doctor + ward manager didn't think she would survive long. But a few weeks has gone by + mum is still surviving , taking small amounts of food , has lost lots of weight, didn't eat for 2 weeks so the weight loss shows now. She is so small , has not thank goodness developed any sores through lack of food, fluid.
My dad has made an appointment to see the Consultant re: mum + what happens next. I don't think he will be able to answer my dads questions, but my dad is dreading my mum developing pressure sores + just barely survivng on the mouth fuls of food she is eating. I think what we went through a couple of weeks ago really has taken the last bit of reserves he had , but I 'm sure my dad thinks that if mums having trouble swallowing that they will stop giving my mum food altogether , but I know they cannot do this. I think that this meeting with the Dr is not going to shed any light on what to expect , I know what can happen, and so doe's my dad but it's not something we've got any control over.
I feel theres nothing I can say to him , because thing's will just happen when they do. My dads fear was that mum will suffer badly towards the end of the illness which at this time it seems may happen, I wish that my mum would close her eyes + just drift into a sleep that she never wakes from but I'm sure I'm not the only person to wish this for a loved one. Suppose thats all I can do is stay as strong as possible + just support my family + take each day at a a time. Thanks for listening , it always helps to talk to you all. Rosie x

 

[connie]

Dear Rosie, nothing new I can say to you. What your dad wants for mum is what we all desirefor ourother halves. Don't despair, don't give up, what will happen we cannot change. Keep strong, Connie

 

[Rosie]

Thanks Connie for reading + replying , always comforting to know someones there who understands. I know there's nothing any one can do but it really doe's help me to get thinks off my chest + it helps me to recharge my batteries. Thanks Rosie xx

 

[Norman]

Rosie
many of us dread the future,I do,but we have to travel the path that so many have gone before,we can;t alter it.
Also many of us have had ,and still have those thoughts that you mentioned.
You are not alone Rosie thinking of you
Norman

 

[Sheila]

Dear Rosie, sounds as if you are doing your very best already. Take it day by day, Norms way. Love to you and your Dad, hope the specialist can help put his mind at rest that all care will be given to your Mum. Love She. XX

 

[Rosie]

Thank you Norman + She, It's comforting to know that whenever I need people who understand to talk to you are there, your suport + words mean so much . Rosie xx

 

[lisaw]

Hello

Hi Rosie,

I think you are at now where I imagine my family will be in a couple years time. My mum is 57 this year and has AD for about 14 years now. I keep thinking that it/she can't get any worse, but then the disease proves me wrong as it continues to rape her of everything. It is like some sick torture out of a horror film. I really do feel for you and your family, I really do hope your family finds peace soon. I am not a religious person but for some reason I am begining to convince myself that there is a heaven where my mum will go when she dies and she will be happy with all the worlds luxuries where she can enjoy what life has taken from her.
take care Rosie, thinking of you
Lisa x

 

[Rosie]

Hello Lisa,
I just read your reply to me + it's brought tears to my eyes. I have been over to see mum today, what a pityful sight she was. I wanted to pick her up into my arms + wish for her to be back to the mum she used to be. I had to swallow hard not to let the tears flow, I tried hard to give her some lunch but she coughed + found it so difficult to swallow. Her eyes open + she seems to stare blankly, + then sometimes a glimmer of a smile, I ask her what she is thinking of , my mum hasn't spoken for years but whatever has made her smile I'm grateful for . The nurses told me that she has good + bad days with eating now, I know there may not be much time now , but I hope + pray that when the time comes, like you my mum will go to a better place where there is a happy life for her + this arwful illness will be gone forever.
Thank you for your words + take care yourself, Rosie xx