Dad is now going onto End Of Life Care

Hazara8

Registered User
Apr 6, 2015
697
0
My brave and strong dad passed away this afternoon I received a call at 4.33pm to say that my dad had now passed, nurse said dad had been checked and when they checked again 5 minutes later he had gone so sadly it sounds like dad was actually alone. I said to her seeing dad yesterday had been really shocking so it was a relief he had now passed which she understood as she said she could see how hard I was finding it when she saw me. I was absolutely distraught yesterday on getting home and really not wanting to go back to see dad again. I was trying to be brave for dad and wouldn't have not gone to see him but it was becoming so hard and not sure how much more I could cope with. I saw dad this morning for a very short visit only because of Covid test result and when they called to say he had passed and that I could go back for the last time before the doctor arrived to do dads certification I wanted to. I went back to CH and spent around 10 minutes with dad but didn't touch him and kept my distance, I just said a few things and told him his suffering was now over and he could now be with mum. It was strange because I felt I could almost hear him breathing and started to look to see if his chest was moving but of course he couldn't be they wouldn't make a mistake like that.
Thank you everyone for the support shown to me it has helped me to know that there are so many kind people out there that have been understanding of my own personnel situation, dad his dementia and awful struggles with sister. I am sad that my dad never got a chance to settle in what I think was a lovely CH and my dreams of visiting him there and him being safe and settled in normal times did not happen. I am grateful that my mum never saw dad get like this and that it was a journey sister and I took with him until the end.
I will still be popping in now and then and will continue to follow your many posts and if I can be of any help will try my best to give my honest advice and offer my support as so many of you have to me. Sadly I know there will be many newcomers and their journeys will just be beginning just as mine did. Sending many hugs to all of you and thank you so very much. ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
Your father has a special daughter. Whilst this time is often a strange mix of thoughts and profound feelings, you have been so considerate in sharing the journey despite the very evident personal cost. I can assure you that there will be many who would long to have received such compassionate care in action as you have illustrated here.
In accord with the many who have accompanied you by way of this forum, l send warm wishes along with sincere thanks for enhancing its fundamental aim and intent.
 

MaNaAk

Registered User
Jun 19, 2016
11,748
0
Essex
Dear @Wildflowerlady,

I'm so sorry to read this and as @Hazara8 says you are a special daughter. Your parents are now together and looking down on you. Your dad is free of this illness and now you need to take time for yourself. Please visit us from time to time and give us your advice.

Hugs

MaNaAk
 

annielou

Registered User
Sep 27, 2019
1,917
0
Yorkshire
Sending my condolences and lots of love @Wildflowerlady ?? I think there’s a mix of feelings of the sadness of losing a much loved parent but also relief they aren’t suffering anymore. Try to take comfort that your dad will be at peace with your mum now and no longer struggling. You have been a great daughter and done your dad proud. ???
 

Duggies-girl

Registered User
Sep 6, 2017
3,620
0
So sorry @Wildflowerlady but he is at peace now. Sadness and relief and a multitude of other emotions will be yours now, it's a tough time but take comfort that you were there for your dad when it mattered and you did say goodbye.

You did him proud.
 

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