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Your father has a special daughter. Whilst this time is often a strange mix of thoughts and profound feelings, you have been so considerate in sharing the journey despite the very evident personal cost. I can assure you that there will be many who would long to have received such compassionate care in action as you have illustrated here.My brave and strong dad passed away this afternoon I received a call at 4.33pm to say that my dad had now passed, nurse said dad had been checked and when they checked again 5 minutes later he had gone so sadly it sounds like dad was actually alone. I said to her seeing dad yesterday had been really shocking so it was a relief he had now passed which she understood as she said she could see how hard I was finding it when she saw me. I was absolutely distraught yesterday on getting home and really not wanting to go back to see dad again. I was trying to be brave for dad and wouldn't have not gone to see him but it was becoming so hard and not sure how much more I could cope with. I saw dad this morning for a very short visit only because of Covid test result and when they called to say he had passed and that I could go back for the last time before the doctor arrived to do dads certification I wanted to. I went back to CH and spent around 10 minutes with dad but didn't touch him and kept my distance, I just said a few things and told him his suffering was now over and he could now be with mum. It was strange because I felt I could almost hear him breathing and started to look to see if his chest was moving but of course he couldn't be they wouldn't make a mistake like that.
Thank you everyone for the support shown to me it has helped me to know that there are so many kind people out there that have been understanding of my own personnel situation, dad his dementia and awful struggles with sister. I am sad that my dad never got a chance to settle in what I think was a lovely CH and my dreams of visiting him there and him being safe and settled in normal times did not happen. I am grateful that my mum never saw dad get like this and that it was a journey sister and I took with him until the end.
I will still be popping in now and then and will continue to follow your many posts and if I can be of any help will try my best to give my honest advice and offer my support as so many of you have to me. Sadly I know there will be many newcomers and their journeys will just be beginning just as mine did. Sending many hugs to all of you and thank you so very much.