Dad in Hospital - would love some reassurance please

[Kay111]

Hi everyone,

Dad went into hospital this morning with a suspected seizure. He's staying in overnight while they observe him.
We're so so very worried - he's in advance stages and doesn't really communicate more than 3 words at a time but will very freaked out and aggressive without a familiar face about. I 100% understand why we can't be there but it seems so so cruel as I can't imagine how distressed he'll be. Is it likely he will be on a ward with other dementia patients? Or do they not really have separate wards, do you know? I just hope he's in where people understand his quirks.

I also had a call from the doctor but it was only to ask me whether there was any DNR decision in place. It was such a shock to receive that call out of the blue. I didn't ask her at the time, because I was so shocked, but is that just a formality to ask that kind of thing?

I can't bear thinking how freaked out dad will be.

 

[Woo2]

Hi @Kay111 , sorry to hear about your dad , hope he is out soon . I don’t have any answers about the logistics in hospital but I do know our local one has a dementia advisor within it to help patients and family , maybe worth a call to the Pals to see if there is . Having nothing useful to say, I am sending you hugs . ?

 

[Woo2]

Hi @Kay111 , sorry to hear about your dad , hope he is out soon . I don’t have any answers about the logistics in hospital but I do know our local one has a dementia advisor within it to help patients and family , maybe worth a call to the Pals to see if there is . Having nothing useful to say, I am sending you hugs . ? It seems common practice in these strange times to ask about DNR , sorry it’s seems so brutal.

 

[canary]

I hope your dad recovers soon.
Seizures can start in advanced dementia as part of the progression, but sometimes they can indicate something else. OH had a whole lot of seizures and ended up in hospital where it was found that he had a UTI and sepsis, so they will want to check your husband quite carefully in case he has something similar.
I too was asked about DNR over the phone, which shocked me as well, but it seems to be a routine thing.

 

[jugglingmum]

My mum was in hospital in January - so I could visit.

The first question I was asked in A & E was DNR - I think it is a routine hospital procedure now (It might be due to some recent legal action re hospitals not consulting relatives re DNR)

My mum was placed on an elderly ward, which clearly had mainly dementia patients on it, although it was a medical ward, this didn't happen a few years previously, although her dementia was only mild then and she was in hostess mode with the Drs.

It was a much better place for her than a general ward as the nurses were clearly familiar with dementia.

I'm guessing hospitals will vary.

 

[jennifer1967]

mine has special geriatric wards and medics seem more clued up these days. but my hospital is a big teaching hospital[ linked to university for doctors and nurses] and at one point they were looking at colours that were better for patients with dementia, signs on doors etc so hopefully but best to ask. hope your dad comes out soon and look after yourself more importantly

 

[lollyc]

Mum has been in 3 weeks now, and moved ward 4 times! The two wards are on the lower ground floor, which does at least mean that they are fairly isolated from the rest of the hospital. She was also admitted in April, and had the same ward shuttle, for no apparent reason. I'm not aware that there are any dementia specific policies in place. This time round we are allowed to visit for 1hr per day, weekdays only. We're in a low Covid area, so not too restricted.

I sent her off in the ambulance with DNR, Advance Decision, and POA letter attached, so no queries from doctors on that score, but I think it's a common thing to ask now.

 

[Kay111]

Hi everyone, thank you for your replies. I've just got back from the hospital. The doctor called and said we were allowed to visit. Dad was still in a&e but me and mum were allowed to be there for 3 hours until he was moved to a ward. Unfortunately/fortunately that whole time he was just asleep and wouldn't wake for anything. We're not sure how worried to be about that yet, he might just be exhausted from all the trauma. He did have a seizure and bit into his tongue really badly and he aspirated his blood so they were worried about him. He's gone to an older person's ward now so hopefully they'll be familiar with his advanced dementia and cope with his fear and anxiety with not knowing where he is. I've tried to call them but no ones answering which is a bit stressful but I know they're busy enough without me hassling them.

So exhausted, but also so incredibly grateful to the doctors and nurses.