Could anyone help me please?

LisaLee

Registered User
Dec 16, 2015
3
Hello my name is Lisa I have a gran with dementia who is 94 and blind.
Currently she is living in an assisted living flat and spends the daytime in a communal lounge, she has carers that look after her during the day and do 2 nighly checks. There is always a family member there between 7.30pm - 9pm when she goes to bed.
Her carers are happy taking care of her their only concern is she sometimes wanders during the night the last time she fell and hurt herself not badly but we want to try and stop this happening.
Our first thought was to turn her front door handle the other way so you have to push it up to open but this is where it all went wrong the lady who is in charge of health and safety of the building said we couldnt do that because it would be locking her in, she said that my nan may not be able to live there any longer and would need an assesment she really doesnt want my nan living there and is negative to any sugestion we have to stop wandering.
We don't want to move my nan as she is very happy and likes her carers, nan is not able to make decisions for herself and doesn't fully understand what is going on, my father and his 2 brothers look out for her and make decisions on her behalf.
Could anyone help with ideas to stop wandering? Would fitting a child gate to her bedroom door so she couldn't get out of her room during the night be a viable option? (she has a toilet in her room and everything she needs)
We have very little experience with dementia we just know we don't want nan to move as she is very happy there.
Her living situation is a flat, the lady who wants her out isn't incharge of her care just health and safety of the building.
I am sorry for such a long post and if you have reached the end thank you we are just very worried
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Blimey

Registered User
Jun 6, 2012
20
Hi Lisa

It would be a shame if your nan had to move as she sounds settled where she is. Have you thought about movement sensors I know there are companies who install and you can get a signal to a phone (if you have a smart phone) or if someone is technical minded in the family there are kits. It wouldn't stop her wandering or falling over but could notify the family if she is moving around and how much, or if she had left a room and not gone back in. You can get movement camara's too, it would mean your sleep is disrupted unless the assisted living people were prepared to be notified by it.
Good Luck
 

LisaLee

Registered User
Dec 16, 2015
3
Thank you for the reply yes Nan is very settled and happy, I was looking at those motion sensors that use the phone we would have to ask the carers if they would be happy with it as they look after her during the night.
It is so frustrating because apart from the wandering she doesn't need that much care, I just wish the health and safety lady would work with us instead of against us
 

Emac

Registered User
Mar 2, 2013
181
Some people are more interested in their rules and regulations than people's welbeing. Your health and safety lady sounds like one of those and I doubt she will change. Who cares what she thinks? Do what you need to do to keep your Nan safe and stand up to this woman when you have to. Otherwise ignore her as far as possible!
 

LisaLee

Registered User
Dec 16, 2015
3
Thank you we have been trying to ignore her as much as possible, which is also what the manager of the care team has in so many words said to us we just want to keep Nan safe during the night and not have the threat of her having to move, it has taken so long to get her feeling safe and settled and moving her would do so much damage
 

fizzie

Registered User
Jul 20, 2011
2,732
Would it be worth asking the team manager if they have come across this before and if they can suggest any solutions? As she is on your side she might be able to help and suggest something that would work for her team. Good luck, this is so difficult. I think putting up a barrier in her bedroom would not really be safe to be honest, she might get really upset and distressed and there would be no-one there to help her.
 

Beate

Registered User
May 21, 2014
11,831
London
I would contact Social Services and ask to be referred to telecare who should be able to offer you a range of tracker and alarm gadgets that could make your Mum safer. It would be a shame for her to have to leave. Social Services have a duty of care for a vulnerable adults at risk through actions like wandering. Use those exact words.