My mum used to fold toilet paper neatly and I would find it all over the house, in pockets, shoes, drawers, cupboards, bags. Annoyingly , no loo paper in the loo! I don't know why she would do this. .?That sort of thing, totally. As you say. The soap, toothbrush and towels that didn't get used for months. The laundry that piled up. The carrier bags full of the food I’d sent, dating back months (concealed, and not where I expected to find them). Neatly folded pieces of unused toilet paper everywhere, including on the floor where they formed "markers", but a definite shortage of toilet rolls in the bathroom. Seven years’ worth of old newspapers. Bills being thrown out unpaid. My books and record collection being thrown out because they were "old and out of date", but rotting rubbish left to pile up in bags in the hall. She’d had to cross a few mounds of junk including bags of rubbish, laundry and unused food (all of which remained un-thrown-out), into the furthest corner of a cluttered spare room, and lean across a bed piled high with empty boxes and other stuff to get at the books and records. (I'm not bitter about it, you can't keep anything forever and I hadn't read them for years, but some of the books are out of print and can't be replaced.)
Yes, we do come out the other side. We won’t be looking at life in the same way again, we’ll likely have scars, but we do survive it.
The hardest thing for me is the ongoing personality change. I find these visits quite stressful and frankly am happier not seeing her, which is a difficult thing to admit, but quite honestly I just don’t want to be alone with her. I don’t know who she is any more. And at the same time, I feel so very sorry for her; she doesn’t have any friends to visit her and no other relatives than me.
(If anyone has any idea what the folded pieces of paper are about do say. I haven't been able to find an explanation.)