Coping with Alcoholic dementia brother

Crosscopgirl

New member
Jan 17, 2020
7
My brother who has drunk all his life and lives with my 93 year old mother is now showing symptoms of alcoholic dementia. Difficult situation as I feel intimidated by him when trying to support my mother. Any ideas on managing the situation?
 

Woohoo

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
673
South East
Hi @Crosscopgirl , welcome to Tp from me , I’m sorry to hear the struggle you are having , I don’t really have any experience on this but hopefully someone will be along soon who does .
 

Bunpoots

Volunteer Host
Apr 1, 2016
3,781
Nottinghamshire
This sounds a really difficult situation @Crosscopgirl and I’m not sure it’s going to be easy to manage. I don’t really have personal experience of alcoholic dementia but a friend’s brother has it and I understand he flies into rages. I can understand you being intimidated.

Do you think your mum is safe living with him? I think I’d let her GP know what the situation is as if s/he thinks there might be a safeguarding issue they should know what action to take.

I’m sorry I can’t be more helpful. I know there is reference on the site to alcoholic dementia and korsakoffs so perhaps you will find something useful if you put these terms into the search bar at the top of the page.

Hopefully someone with experience of this will be along soon.
 

Crosscopgirl

New member
Jan 17, 2020
7
Thankyou for caring in your response. Ive just realised I can share this problem with others! Ongoing I have broad shoulders to carry this and Im thankful to have found others who will listen.
 

Crosscopgirl

New member
Jan 17, 2020
7
This sounds a really difficult situation @Crosscopgirl and I’m not sure it’s going to be easy to manage. I don’t really have personal experience of alcoholic dementia but a friend’s brother has it and I understand he flies into rages. I can understand you being intimidated.

Do you think your mum is safe living with him? I think I’d let her GP know what the situation is as if s/he thinks there might be a safeguarding issue they should know what action to take.

I’m sorry I can’t be more helpful. I know there is reference on the site to alcoholic dementia and korsakoffs so perhaps you will find something useful if you put these terms into the search bar at the top of the page.

Hopefully someone with experience of this will be along soon.
 

Crosscopgirl

New member
Jan 17, 2020
7
I have been monitoring the situation for a few years now, so although I know she feels intimidated by him when hes been drinking I know he loves her and seems to be able to stand up for herself. If he was to realise how intimidated she felt or even how I felt he would be mortified. Maybe I have to have this is conversation with him with someone else with me. My eldest brother (who also never left home)committed suicide and I know this is in the back of mums mind with this brother so she puts up with his behaviour. First time Ive talked about it outside the family.
 

Woohoo

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
673
South East
Thankyou for caring in your response. Ive just realised I can share this problem with others! Ongoing I have broad shoulders to carry this and Im thankful to have found others who will listen.
Plenty of people here to listen even if can’t advise or have any experience they are all very supportive .
 

Woohoo

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
673
South East
That’s so sad , I am sorry about your brother .It must be a big factor in your mums approach to him. Hope you manage to get things sorted out so you can feel better about the situation .
 

Dimpsy

Registered User
Sep 2, 2019
1,019
You will have such support from the kind folks on this forum, a trouble shared is a trouble halved and that is very true here. You think you're on your own, but someone will have been along the path before and will share their experiences with you.
I hope that you can find a solution that helps your brother and mother, what a caring and kind person you are.