CoP Deputyship and Notify relatives?

[And247]

Hello!

I'm filling in the CoP forms for deputyship of dad's financial affairs at the minute as he is totally incapable....

I’m a little confused about section 4.2 of CoP 1. ‘Please give details of other people you will be notifying’, (at least 3).

My dad has two children (my sister and me), plus he has two brothers and a sister. All of which would appear to be ideal people to ‘notify’ as per the guidelines. However my dad was a very difficult person before his issues started and for a long time totally disowned my sister and one of his brothers. He certainly wouldn’t want them involved in any way with this application, (however he certainly couldn’t understand this now).

In the guidelines it states that you should notify all people in each category, (children, brothers / sisters etc.) unless there is a good reason not to do so.….

I rang the CoP about this for guidance and they replied that I need to put all the people on the notify list as I shouldn’t pick and choose who my dad would want to be informed.

Yet the guidance does seem to suggest I can omit people to be notified ‘if there is a good reason’, (which I think there is as my dad would hate them being involved in any way). The problem then would be I would only notify 2 people (not min 3).

My feeling is to follow what I was told on the phone by the CoP however my dad certainly would have not been happy at all!

Has anyone had any experience like this when filling in CoP1?

Thanks And

 

[Jessbow]

its not so much about your dad, but people who would trust you to act as his deputy.

he might have a problem with your sister, but do you? Would your sister object to you applying?

 

[And247]

Hi Jessbow

I don't think either of the 'problem' relatives would have issues with me being deputy as I get on with them fine. (I hope..)

I guess the issue is dad would be horrified they were even being notified, (not that he can understand that now).

And

 

[Jessbow]

That's exactly it - he doesn't understand and that's why you are doing it.

 

[WILLIAMR]

Hello!

I'm filling in the CoP forms for deputyship of dad's financial affairs at the minute as he is totally incapable....

I’m a little confused about section 4.2 of CoP 1. ‘Please give details of other people you will be notifying’, (at least 3).

My dad has two children (my sister and me), plus he has two brothers and a sister. All of which would appear to be ideal people to ‘notify’ as per the guidelines. However my dad was a very difficult person before his issues started and for a long time totally disowned my sister and one of his brothers. He certainly wouldn’t want them involved in any way with this application, (however he certainly couldn’t understand this now).

In the guidelines it states that you should notify all people in each category, (children, brothers / sisters etc.) unless there is a good reason not to do so.….

I rang the CoP about this for guidance and they replied that I need to put all the people on the notify list as I shouldn’t pick and choose who my dad would want to be informed.

Yet the guidance does seem to suggest I can omit people to be notified ‘if there is a good reason’, (which I think there is as my dad would hate them being involved in any way). The problem then would be I would only notify 2 people (not min 3).

My feeling is to follow what I was told on the phone by the CoP however my dad certainly would have not been happy at all!

Has anyone had any experience like this when filling in CoP1?

Thanks And

Hi And

As far as I understand it if you choose to notify a brother / sister then all people in this category have to be notified for example if he has 4 brother's / sisters all have to be informed not just the ones you want.

In theory they could object but in practice this rarely happens. I have heard of a case when somebody tried to object but when he realised he could not spend the money in any way he wanted he backed down.
I know in one case the address of the father's brother was unknown.
He was not expected to trace people.

William

 

[teahound]

Hi And,

Apologies if this goes wrong as it's my first post. I had this with my mum when she was doing LPoA, she didn't want anyone except my brother and I to know (and she was appointing us as attorneys). We went through mum's solicitor and he said that the consultant from the memory clinic could be informed instead of fairly distant relatives. She visited mum at home when I was there, then spoke to mum on her own and then wrote to the solicitor. This was accepted as fine by the Office of the Public Guardian. I'm not sure if this would be suitable for the Court of Protection but you could ask maybe? Hope it helps and good luck.

Teahound

 

[Katrine]

What is in someone's best interests, now, isn't always what they would have chosen. You don't have to tie yourself in knots trying to comply with his former wishes. You're also not applying for the 'problem relatives' to give you permission to be Deputy; the Court does that.

My solicitor explained, when I started the process of becoming my mother's legal guardian, that with registering a POA the adult has already chosen their Attorney/s, but if someone applies to be Deputy/Guardian they are doing this without the prior permission of the adult. This is a very big deal - to have complete power over someone's finances, property and sometimes their welfare too. The COP has to ensure that the powers are being granted to a fit person who is in the best position to act for that adult. The persons to be notified can, potentially, shed more light on the details of the application.

Look on this COP guidance as a positive for you. The more relatives who endorse you as a suitable Deputy the better. If you seek to exclude some of them to spare your dad's dignity re past conflicts, you risk one of them crying foul. Much better to remain transparent.

I am in the process of being confirmed as my mum's Guardian. She did not want this when she was of sound mind. She told her solicitor that under no circumstances was I ever to have anything to do with her affairs. She appointed Attorneys who are no longer able to act for her. There's only me left in the UK so OH and I have taken on the job. I don't actually care that it isn't what she wanted in the past because it is what she NEEDS now.

With regard to the privacy/dignity issue for your dad, I get that too. Of course he wouldn't be happy about people knowing about his disability, but that is inevitable in this situation. It isn't just the 'problem relatives' who will know about his mental impairment; plenty of 'strangers' will know about it too. Perhaps that thought might put your dilemma in perspective?

My mum's private life is now known to solicitors, court officials, social workers, mental health workers, psychiatric services, doctors, nurses, OTs, carers, etc. not to mention the suppliers of incontinence products and disability aids, and all the people involved in grant-aided work on her house. There is very little privacy in this situation, but there is still dignity. The whole wide, disparate team of people who know my mum's business are working to maintain her health, safety and quality of life.

You, as your dad's Deputy, will be the team leader.

 

[And247]

Well thank you all very much for your great replies and perfect sense.

Filling these forms in is a nightmare and you just made me feel positive again!

Thanks. And

 

[Brogues]

Hi

Look at which catergory you put them in - there are two off the top of my head I couldn't tell you what they are called but put int he closest at the top as they will be "told more" and the less close just tobe notified


I had a bit of a shocker how much they told my mums boy friend!!!!! Who had been parading as her husband and which social workers had believed until they realised they needed a "real" next of kin!

 

[tealover]

I just put my brother to be notified and a note that he and I are Mum's only children, she is widowed.

Her siblings - now there is only 1 and he too has AD.

Her close friends - all drifted away when she became unwell (even lifelong friends ).

My brother had already stated that he didn't want to be involved in any shape or form, but he was the only person who I felt that in all sincerity and integrity, would need to know.

I formally notified him in the second phase of the process at the beginning of July, I have heard nothing at all since then from the court so I am making the assumption that it is progressing as expected.

The forms can be a bit complicated but I found Talking Point peeps a huge help, and the guidance notes. I also printed off 2 forms, and did a dummy run first to be sure I hadn't misinterpreted anything, then copied neatly to the forms I sent off!!

Good luck
x

 

[Brogues]

Just to add when I spoke to COP they confirmed I didn't need to inform relatives who were not in contact - I told my sister mums adult granddaughter the faux husband and her brother - her brother wrote back to cop saying he wasn't interested and has never enquired how mum is Just notify who might feel involved BUT there is no compulsion

 

[And247]

I think one of the 'interesting' things about this last couple of years has been the reaction of the other family and also some of the 'friends'.

My dad is now in a care home and mum still in her home yet people seem to have deserted her too...

Ho hum

 

[Brogues]

I think one of the 'interesting' things about this last couple of years has been the reaction of the other family and also some of the 'friends'.

My dad is now in a care home and mum still in her home yet people seem to have deserted her too...

Ho hum

Mum has pretty much lost all hers now - it really is heartbreaking xx

 

[TheFootyPoet]

COP1 - Clarification on Respondents and an unusual case about 'not' Notifying

Sorry - I meant to put up a new post, but replied to this thread instead. Please ignore.

 

[99purdy]

Hi, just wanted to add I recently completed COP deputyship. You can actually notify people who are regularly involved with his/her care. It does not have to brothers, sisters etc. My dad is estranged from most of his family and although I did not think they would object to my deputyship I decided against notifying them. I notified myself, my husband, my sister and brother in law. The court accepted this without any problems. Hope this helps.