Consequences of not doing as LA want..?

[Daffy123]

In your position the first place I'd go to would be the CAB.

No the £150 a week is what the care home asked me for because the council haven't paid them a penny yet , its not a top up just interim payments because they would like some payment. Ive refused pay it in any case & sign the contract. I think getting a disregard is going just prolong the problems and if anything make things worse while it gets sorted out. Depending on how this afternoons meeting goes , I think I'm going say just take over. Feel like I'm abandoning mum but my own welfare needs considering and I can't carry on living like this feeling the weight is all on me all the time. It'll never end not how our local council seem to work ..

It comes across to me from reading this thread and seeing some of your other threads that you are overwhelmed and hence just want to walk away from it all. I think you've got quite a strong case for a disregard and I suggest you don't give up on it. You've lived in your Mothers home for decades, paid the mortgage, plus the house is still mortgaged and not worth a lot. You've been a carer for x time. I'm sure the CAB could think of other reasons why you should get a disregard.
Going to the CAB is crucial if you want to get things sorted out.

 

[Beate]

I honestly don't know what to say anymore as I'm not sure you're even taking in some of the advice given. Walking away from your Mum's property before the financial assessment including application for a discretionary disregard is completed is absolute madness, so don't even mention it to them! Just tell them to be quick about it as you are stressed and the care home are badgering you for money, which they honestly shouldn't do.

 

[Duggies-girl]

I strongly agree with @Beate and @Daffy123 don't just walk away. Your not giving yourself any credit for what you have done for your mum by walking away.

I know sometimes it seems easier to just walk away but you are obviously a fighter or you would not have come this far with your mum. Don't just give up.

 

[CrestFallen]

Thank you everyone just to update things I met with my social worker this afternoon. Contrary to what I've been lead to believe he assured me that if I was to give the house over to the LA that mum would be allowed stay in the care home Ive found for her. They also still wouldn't just kick me out they are not allowed to make anyone homeless they'd have come to an arrangement. The care home shouldn't be billing me or have me signing contracts according to what he said we arnt even in the 12 week deffered payments. We are in a six week cooling off period with the care home. The financial assements not been completed so nothing can be decided yet. Which is what some body said to me on here a week or so ago. I asked about discretional disregard but he wasn't sure what that was !! But he also told me I'll be getting a new SW in two or three weeks a community SW. I asked him what he was then and he's from the hospital , works for the council but deals with assessments and discharges and care home placements. I never new this but probably explains why I've hardly ever seen him. I just hope its not a case of one tells you something and another tells you another.

 

[Lindy50]

That sounds about right to me @CrestFallen

Glad your meeting went well and hope you feel reassured, as I feel you are entitled to xx

 

[CrestFallen]

Thank you @Lindy50 its helped to get some clarification. You go round in circles and read all sort of horror stories in search of answers to your own situation. I will still probably end up moving out but so long as mums safe and I can get to see her everyday where she is that's what matters most. Every thing in my life as suddenly changed maybe its fates way saying it's time I moved on. I've been here 40yrs either way I cut it , if mum passes I will still have to find the money to pay back what she owes the council. It can't come from me so would have to sell up then. I'm going speak to CAB about disregard but to be honest my fights all but gone, the past few years and these last four months have been seriously hard. Its funny because when mum was first diagnosed for few years I kept thinking its not so bad I can cope with this. If I'd only known what was coming.. Ignorance is bliss as they say x