Confusion at night

feralcole

Registered User
Nov 18, 2020
15
0
Hi everyone - think it's about time I joined a support and information forum. Here is some information about me and my family.

My mum was formally diagnosed with Alzheimer's around 3 years ago, but it was clear she had it some years before that, I would say she has been living with it for around 6/7 years, and probably should have had the diagnosis around 5 years ago - but I think her and Dad were understandably reluctant to face this at the time.

My parents are both 87 years old - Dad is sprightly, an ex-sportsman whilst Mum is very frail and has trouble walking due to her very poor balance issues and frailness. My Dad is her caregiver, and I live about 90 minutes from them and pre-Covid would pop down every weekend to see them and give Dad some time off from caring. Between lockdowns I would meet them in a pub or the golf club and sit away from them but still be able to spend time with them. The new lockdown means we are back to phone/Skype as I am not comfortable visiting them in their home, and neither is my Dad.

In 'normal' times Dad takes Mum out every single day, visiting the pub, social clubs and Caregivers Cafes so they see people and interact with friends, but he is now unable to go anywhere with her, bar taking her for a daily ride in the car to familiar places.

Dad is a proud man and likes to take everything on, and is reluctant to ask for help. Mum is at the stage where she has started getting distressed at night, wondering where she is and then getting dressed to go out. She still knows who we are...though I think she is forgetting her son (my brother) as he lives in Austria and he has not been able to come home since February due to Covid.

I think my first question is...is there anything we can do to help with her confusion at night? Does anyone have any tips and guidance? Thank you x
 

lemonbalm

Registered User
May 21, 2018
1,799
0
Hello @feralcole . Is your mum on any medication at all? A low dose anti-anxiety medication like Mirtazapine can help with restlessness if she is able to take that. Other members may be along with more advice. You might want to start your own thread on the subject so that more people see it. Is your Dad accepting any outside help at all? I know it can be difficult to persuade a proud parent to let other people give them a hand. It sounds as though he is doing a great job and you are obviously very supportive but it's a lot for him to deal with.
 

feralcole

Registered User
Nov 18, 2020
15
0
Hi @lemonbalm - thank you for the reply. The question is currently mute...Mum took a tumble and broker her hip today, so now in the hospital for a while I suspect. On the upside, Dad can get some sleep...

Thank you for the advice though...we have an appointment booked with the doctor next week so see if she can a medicine of some kind to help. I will ask about Mirtazapine :)
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
7,195
0
Nottinghamshire
Sorry to hear about your mum’s fall @feralcole . I hope she recovers well and is home soon. Maybe while she is in hospital it’s time to talk to your dad about getting a bit of extra help in when she comes home.
 

Weasell

Registered User
Oct 21, 2019
1,778
0
My motto in life is forewarned is forearmed!
I hesitate about replying to your post as I know the accepted practice is to be up beat, but just thought I would raise a couple of points.
Just a word of warning. It is possible your mum may get delirium, just be prepared in case this applies!
Also the fall could cause the dementia to take a step downwards.

I would be requesting she goes to the rehab in your area , which would get high physio imput. I would also request that when she returns home it is with a package of care.
Wishing you well at a difficult time!
 

feralcole

Registered User
Nov 18, 2020
15
0
Thanks everyone...she’s just gone in to theatre...with Dad st home as not allowed to go to the hospital. Dad is already talking about getting help in...so that’s a relief.

@Weasell yes, last time she had a fall and stint in hospital the dementia worsened...so we’re ready for that. What is delirium in relation to Alzheimer’s?
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
73,996
0
72
Dundee
Welcome to the forum @feralcole.

I’m so glad your dad is now talking about getting help in.

My husband had bad delirium once - caused by a really bad chest infection. I wondered if this factsheet would be of any help -


I hope things settle down soon and you can get support sorted out.
 

lemonbalm

Registered User
May 21, 2018
1,799
0
Hello @feralcole . I hope the op goes ok. It is indeed a good opportunity to get your parents used to having help in. My mum was in rehab for nearly three months after she broke her hip but I think this is an unusually long time.

Delirium can be a problem (my mum got it pretty badly). It can vary a lot in severity and duration. I see you have already been given a link to the information about it. Let us know how things go and we'll help you along. Good luck.