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James Spary

New member
Apr 2, 2020
Hello, I am a 56 year old male. I am not sure whether or not I have dementia. I have some upsetting symptoms which are simple such as making a chicken in the oven and then forgetting to put other things on the cooker near the end of the time that the chicken is finished. I can’t seem to judge how many potatoes I would need for say five people anymore, whereas I used to be able to do this with my eyes closed. I was out shopping the other day and just found myself stood in an aisle just staring at what to get but my mind was just blank and refused me any motivation to do anything. It was scary and once I got home I laid down for about 30 minutes sort of resting my brain as it was, and after the time had elapsed, I felt normality again. I am living with my wife and four children but I feel like a stranger towards them with no real feelings. Really worried as my mum has got Alzheimer’s really bad and I now worry it’s inherited.
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Registered User
Jul 23, 2017
N Ireland
Hello @James Spary, and welcome to the forum. You have come to the right place for information and support.

The best thing to do in this situation is have a chat with your GP. Many treatable conditions, such as depression, stress, thyroid problems, vitamin deficiencies etc., can cause dementia like symptoms so it's important to have a check-up. Please don't cause additional stress by jumping to the immediate conclusion that it's dementia. On the other hand, if it is dementia then a diagnosis may open up support for you.

Here is a link to a Society Fact sheet about the diagnosis issue. Just click the second line to read or print the document

Assessment and diagnosis (426)
PDF printable version

Now that you have found us I hope you will keep posting as the membership has vast collective knowledge and experience.


Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
hello @James Spary
a warm welcome to DTP
these are challenging and stressful times and you are no doubt worried about your mum and how things will be for you all in the future
stress, depression, vitamin B12 deficiency and other conditions share some of the symptoms of dementia and though it's possible for Alzheimer's to be inherited it is pretty rare
maybe give yourself some space to relax a little
you can certainly write out your concerns and contact your GP with an email so they can look over what you describe and if they see something to talk over with you the GP can get in touch ... and they may be able to settle your mind
I do wonder whether your feelings for your mum and her condition might be affecting how you feel about others you care about ... sometimes we distance when we fear getting hurt or are overwhelmed .... a sort of survival technique