The other day Mum with moderate AD says to me " I have something to show you I have had for a very long time. Its something my Mum gave to me when I was 21"
Wondering what it was, because Mum had never ever shown me before, she brings out a a very new looking camisole & petticoat.
I looked at the labels and sure enough , I remember she bought it about 3 yrs earlier from a certain Dept store, but instead of agreeing with her I said " Oh, I remember you buying these a few years back as you wanted new ones"
Mum looked confused, and then asked Dad if he had bought them for her when they got married. Of course Dad never ever gives things a second thought and said No.
Mum said well she didnt remember buying them, put them away, and came back to watch TV.
Now I know the compassionate communication says you should just go along with and agree, but if I had agreed, Dad would have contradicted me anyway, and Im not sure if Mum would have been more confused?
Dad has cognitive impairment, and cannot fathom Mums Alzheimers most days. His memory isn't so sharp either.
But when compassionate communication says to go along with and agree, and then you have maybe the other parent or siblings disagreeing..... Whats going to be the best approach here?
Wondering what it was, because Mum had never ever shown me before, she brings out a a very new looking camisole & petticoat.
I looked at the labels and sure enough , I remember she bought it about 3 yrs earlier from a certain Dept store, but instead of agreeing with her I said " Oh, I remember you buying these a few years back as you wanted new ones"
Mum looked confused, and then asked Dad if he had bought them for her when they got married. Of course Dad never ever gives things a second thought and said No.
Mum said well she didnt remember buying them, put them away, and came back to watch TV.
Now I know the compassionate communication says you should just go along with and agree, but if I had agreed, Dad would have contradicted me anyway, and Im not sure if Mum would have been more confused?
Dad has cognitive impairment, and cannot fathom Mums Alzheimers most days. His memory isn't so sharp either.
But when compassionate communication says to go along with and agree, and then you have maybe the other parent or siblings disagreeing..... Whats going to be the best approach here?