coming home

[taylorcat]

Well, Mum's diarrhoea seems to have stopped and the hospital are discharging her tomorrow, complete with commode. I hoped my Dad would have let me have an opinion on this but no he says he'll manage so there's nothing else I can do.

 

[Cate]

Hi Taylorcat

Good news that mum is coming home and the diarrhoea seems to have stopped, fingers crossed it wont happen again.

Lets also hope that your dad is able to cope, you can only wait and see how it goes. Sadly when different problems arise, we all seem to be 'waiting and seeing'.

Best wishes

Cate

 

[Kathleen]

Well, Mum's diarrhoea seems to have stopped and the hospital are discharging her tomorrow, complete with commode. I hoped my Dad would have let me have an opinion on this but no he says he'll manage so there's nothing else I can do.

You can just be around to help if your Dad needs you, he will need support, but I really hope things get better for you all.

Best wishes

Kathleen

 

[Skye]

Good news, taylorcat.

All you can do is be there ready to help your dad as much as possible. I can onderstand him wanting your mum home, but he is going to need your help.

All the best,

 

[Grannie G]

I`m so sorry taylorcat,

I sense the underlying anxiety in your post but your dad has the final decision and for his own sake, he must give it a try.

I just hope your mum stays as well as possible.

Love xx

 

[taylorcat]

Thank you all for listening. My concern is not only for my Dad who is running himself into the ground but also for Mum. He is not doing her any favours by bringing her home. He cannot care for her the way she is being cared for in hospital at the moment, i.e. she is up for breakfast, has a physio walking round the ward once a day, watching all the goings on there. When she comes home I'm sure it won't be long until it's back to sleeping until lunchtime, up during the night etc.etc. I'm not criticising him for doing this, I would probably do the same because it's easier but he can't seem to see he is not helping anyone by trying to care for her at home. Even the CPN, when I spoke to him on my own told me in his opinion Mum should be cared for professionally.

 

[Áine]

maybe your dad just needs to come to that realisation in his own time taylorcat? i wonder if he needs to be sure he really can't manage before he can feel ok to consider professional care?

your post also made me wonder about the relative benefits of different sorts of care. mum may not get physio and regular hours at home, but at least she's at home and with you dad, and maybe that counts for a lot.

like Cate says, i guess like so many things it's going to have to be "wait and see"

 

[fearful fiona]

I think being with the person you love does mean a lot even if it means sacrificing some of the things like physio etc. My parents are still together at home and sort of "look out for each other" and keep each other going. They do benefit from a care package though. They have been together over 60 years. I don't think either could cope on their own really.

 

[taylorcat]

Thanks all, because of what you said I'm trying to look at it a bit differently now.