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coming home to an empty house

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by marmarlade, Dec 27, 2015.

  1. marmarlade

    marmarlade Registered User

    Jan 26, 2015
    183
    well the christmas holidays are almost over.ive spent them with hubby at our sons it was different ,but at least he was with us.after leaving him at the care home i went home,but it was so lonely it broke my heart nearly as bad as when i had to put him into care,yes ive got family that ive seen all christmas but it was so quiet and no one to share silly things with,i think i have cried as much this christmas when im on my own as when i left him at first.i know im not the only one who misses their loved ones so i will wish you all a peaceful new year and super strength to carry on as we all need it
     
  2. pamann

    pamann Registered User

    Oct 28, 2013
    2,635
    Kent
    Hello marmalade, it is awful for us, l felt very upset when l left my hubby christmas day, could have gone to our sons but just wanted to go home, had a glass of wine and went to bed. So pleased christmas is over, hopefully we will accept the new life we now have. Thinking of you
     
  3. jimbo 111

    jimbo 111 Registered User

    Jan 23, 2009
    5,082
    North Bucks
    , but I

    I have repeatedly said how sad I feel for people like yourselves who live in the 'limbo' of being separated from your loved ones who are in care homes
    Xmas and other occasions like birthday's, and anniversary's must be heart breaking
    My wife died some five years ago , and my heartache is not repeated in the same way as you face every time you have to leave your loved ones
    I console my loneliness when returning to an empty home by looking at the pictures of my lovely wife and saying ' you would have enjoyed it love ,and I am sure they missed you '
    God Bless and I send you my heartfelt consolation
    jimbo
     
  4. pamann

    pamann Registered User

    Oct 28, 2013
    2,635
    Kent
    Thank you Jimbo, l do understand we are so different to you, we have lost our loved ones, but they are still here, it is impossible to move on. We suffer so much everyday, l dread visiting my hubby, people say don't go everyday, l cannot do that, they are friends who are not in the same situation as me, all the while my hubby is alive l will see him everyday.☺
     
  5. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    Pam you should probably give yourself the odd day off. I visit nearly every day but have had a couple of days in the past seven weeks when I haven't gone to see Bernard and, awful as it sounds, it has been a relief. Some days I think I'm beginning to come to terms with this situation but on others I feel quite bereft. xxx


    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     
  6. patchworkamber

    patchworkamber Registered User

    Jan 6, 2014
    45
    south east wales
    My daughter went home yesterday after spending Christmas with me and suddenly I feel all alone again. My OH had to go into care on 14th December and while I know its the best thing etc its so hard over xmas. But for me it is knowing that I now face a future living alone and adjusting to that will take time. Love to all in a similar situation.
     

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