Selfishly, I’m determined that this year I WILL enjoy Christmas. The last few years I’ve run myself ragged trying to either appease Mother and MIL or try to ensure that they’re having a good time - at the detriment of my own, my husband’s and my adult children’s enjoyment. I’ve been so grumpy and fed up in the past with the ‘grannies’ that the rest of the family have all suffered. Last Christmas Eve, the four of us drove two hours up to my mother’s with MIL in the car - who moaned all the way - to ensure my mother didn’t miss out. I took a turkey crown and all the trimmings with me and cooked the whole roast from scratch at mother’s. MIL grizzled because she didn’t want to wait for her lunch and kept asking how much longer it was going to take as she was hungry! My mother announced that she didn’t want anything to eat as she wasn’t hungry and I burst into tears because I’d made all the effort to ensure the both of them had some sort of festivity and clearly, I needn’t have bothered. This year they’re both in the same CH. We’ll visit in the morning and once we’ve done that, the four of us plus other halves will relax, play silly games, drink as much as we want to (because for once, no one needs to drive them home) watch whatever we want and be totally indulgent. The stress of catering for and entertaining the pair of them over many years - even before dementia - is over and I’m determined I shall make the most of it.