change of POA is it possible???

[Limara_2000]

My Dad remarried 40 years ago so his wife is regarded first next of kin, when he was first DX with AD around 15 months ago she says she didn't want POA but was " given it" I know you have to apply for it and to be quite honest you cant believe a single word that comes from her mouth any way!
Something happened a week ago no idea what it was and cant get enough sense out of her, I have never seen anything like how he was in A&E and hope I don't ever see it again! Before he had even had the dx she had started to contact her doctor to say about her not being able to care for him any more, god thats a joke some how she gets carers but the only care she provides is yelling at him what to do. Its him that does the care for her and isn't it funny that now he is in hospital she now needs care 3 times a day!.
The way she repeats herself over and over and will continue until she has finished telling me what she wants to say about herself then very conveniently cant hear you any more I honestly believe that she is not medically fit to have the decision making over my dad. She was adament shes not having him home even though he bought the house they live in and that was before he had any DX about what happened. BUT that's not my concern neither is the financial POA I don't care about the money I just don't want her able to do the decision making for him is there anything I can do.

 

[Kevinl]

If you go to the link below you can find out if she actually has an LPA in the first place.
Even if someone has an LPA the medical people can override it if in their opinion what the LPA holder wants is not in the best interests of the patient concerned.
If things are as you describe then it won't take them long to figure out what the situation is for themselves.
K

https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/search-public-guardian-registers

 

[jenniferpa]

Well you aren't exactly right about one thing: a donor appoints an attorney. It's not down to the attorney to apply. If your step mother has now herself lost capacity, someone could now apply to be his deputy.

As to her refusing to have your father home: no adult can be forced to take care of another adult, and she might not actually be able to care for him, in which case you can't force her to.

 

[Limara_2000]

Well you aren't exactly right about one thing: a donor appoints an attorney. It's not down to the attorney to apply. If your step mother has now herself lost capacity, someone could now apply to be his deputy.

As to her refusing to have your father home: no adult can be forced to take care of another adult, and she might not actually be able to care for him, in which case you can't force her to.

He wouldn't have appointed any one it was done by who ever visited after the dx, I am assuming social services ..... I don't actually want him to go home that's the last thing I would want for him, She has been treating him so bad since he lost his licence and cant be her personal taxi any more. Im not happy with her making decisions about where and what should happen to him now.

Where you have said no adult can be forced to look after another adult can you elaborate on that please, in my dads ward is a man of 89 whom is cared for by his 88 year old wife, when he went in hospital 4 weeks ago he was walking she has been very worried about him just being transferred in and out of bed he now cant walk and physios have said they don't know if he will ever walk again and as far as they are concerned he is able to go home she is really worried and rightly so there is a huge difference with some one that can do a little for themselves to some one that is not able to help at all. Is there any info which may help her?

 

[Beate]

One thing I am pretty sure about is that Social Services do not get involved in Power of Attorney!

Jenniferpa is right - no person can be forced to look after another - duty of care lies entirely with the state. The old lady you are talking about has every right to refuse to take her husband back home if she does not feel able to take care of him. I have been in exactly that situation. My OH had a sudden loss of mobility and the hospital wanted to discharge him as soon as he was considered "medically fit", with a vague promise of community physios coming in now and then. But in the meantime both him and me would have been housebound, so I said, that's not happening - you need to send him to a rehab ward first. So they did. That ward tried for 8 weeks to get him walking again but it didn't happen. In the end there was no objection from anyone about him needing to be transferred to a care home. The hospital SW was very helpful, said it needed to be a nursing home and helped me with finding a place. So yeah - she absolutely has the right to refuse but she needs to be forceful about it. She needs to talk to the social worker and ask for a "best interest meeting" to establish the right care package before any discharge - otherwise they might have a failed discharge on their hand and they wouldn't want that. A failed discharge is when someone is readmitted within 30 days of being discharged, and hospitals can be punished for that. I doesn't hurt to remind them of that!

 

[jenniferpa]

Social services don't have the power to appoint an attorney. Only your father could have chosen her to be his attorney: that's just how it works. And it might have been something he set up way before he was diagnosed. If there is an lpa in place, he had to have granted it while he had capacity (which could have been after diagnosis). But this wasn't put in place over his head. Assuming that there is one. Are you sure you aren't confusing an lpa with appointeeship (which just gives someone the right to manage another person's DWP benefits/pension.

I'm not sure how to elaborate on "no adult can be forced to care for another" because that's the basic truth. As to what other people do: that's their choice, within the restrictions that such care is the best thing for that person. Sadly, even with the best will in the world, a person may not be able to return home even with a willing carer if it's not in their best interest to do so.

Your step-mother has been married to your father for 40 years. She is of course going to have input into his placement. You can express your opinion as well. If he's going to be funded by the local authority, finances will be a constraint. This will happen if his savings are less than the upper limit of £23k. Note his house is automatically excluded if a spouse is living in it.

If you think a care home is the likely option, you could now start to do the research: visiting potential homes to see if you think they might suit him.

 

[Limara_2000]

Well this POA is now more baffling I was told she "didn't want it but they gave it to her" If it was after the dx then no way would he have understood it, other than signing at bit of paper put in front of him and signing where he had been told to sign.I am sure Neither of them would have known anything about a LPA it prior to this.Thanks for that info Beate, I will show her that at the next visit, hopefully it will help she has been in quite a state since they told her yesterday. The idea of visiting the care homes is good, I don't think we are likely to get any choice in it if its SC funded they are few and far between and all full up round here.

 

[Beate]

I don't see how so anyone can be forced to be an attorney. They have to sign the document too, so if they don't want to, they can simply refus to sign. On the other hand, I would say the ideal person to be the attorney would be a wife of 40 years. If you wanted to object to that you'd need a really good reason like suspected fraud or something. A vague "I don't like her and don't want her to be in charge" is not going to be enough, I'm afraid.

 

[jenniferpa]

I'm not sure there is in fact an lpa in place. If I were the op I'd take Kevin's advice and actually check if i hadn't seen a registered copy.

The reality though, lpa or not, is that if the step-mother isn't fit to care for the father (and it sounds to me as if it's possible that she also has dementia) the op's father is probably going to be placed in a care home, unless another family member is willing to care for him (assuming he is assessed as being suitable for care at home).

 

[Limara_2000]

Does any one know how long the search should take for the register... time is running out decisions are being made and its definatly not what is in his best interest. Shes totally abandoned him has only visited for a total of 2 hours in 2 weeks. I can't have him placed too far away for me to be able to visit.

 

[nitram]

Does any one know how long the search should take for the register..

For email requests

OPG will respond within 5 working days. It may take longer if they contact you by post.

https://www.gov.uk/find-someones-attorney-or-deputy

It's free, if you have not done so, send the email as soon as you can.

 

[Limara_2000]

For email requests

OPG will respond within 5 working days. It may take longer if they contact you by post.


It's free, if you have not done so, send the email as soon as you can.

THANK YOU I missed that info, I did apply by e-mail last Thursday, its now not a case of changing the POA its a case of finding out if she actually has the power she thinks she has. I'm pretty sure the only one that she would have been bothered about was money but neither of them would have understood anything about the forms or filled them in I now believe it may have been Age concern that visited after DX that had this input not SS

 

[Jessbow]

He will be placed according to HIS needs, not yours ( Sorry, that just the way it is)

I'd guess he will be placed somewhere near where he lives now, prob fairly close to his wife, she has been his wife of 40 years so that isn't unreasonable.
Your view of her does seem to be , shall we say, less favourable. That does make things difficult I know, and nothing would be as difficult as managing his finances around her IF you apply for deputyship. You cannot just 'change' a POA once issued, if indeed it has been.
If your father now lacks capacity is deputy or nothing.