My mother who has AD has lived with our family for 5 years. I also have a daughter in her 20's who lives at home too. She has complex needs, in a wheelchair, uses an electronic communication aid, needs feeding, toiletting etc. She had been at college during the day Mon-Fri up until last summer, now the funding has been stopped and we now supposedly have 18 hours week care for her at home. The carers often turn up late, if they go anywhere I have to take them and pick them up as no transport anymore. They change or move on frequently. This weekend I had managed to get a sitter for Mum as daughter was going to respite. In the last 5 years I can count on the fingers of one hand how often this has occurred. To cut a long strory short. My daughters respite has been cancelled. My husband and I have had to cancel our original plans. At such short notice could not find accomodation for the 3 of us in a wheelchair accessible room so I am taking my daughter on my own, while my husband does some DIY at home whilst Mum has the sitter. Looking after my daughter is tiring but she is good company and so pleased to do anything and never moans that we will have a nice time. I am so disappointed as I had so been looking forward to the break as I needed it. Mum can wash and dress herself but needs to be cooked for and her meds put out due to her confusion. I feel so ashamed to say that lately everything she says and does irritates me. In the week I met an old work colleague for a meal and because it had already got dark she said 'Oh its not worth going-its dark and cold and she(the work colleague) isn't even nice'! Initially when I told her we were going away for the weekend it was' Well I've got nothing to reproach myself for I was a good mother- I'm saying no more, you do what you want don't mind me!!!' When I say it is not unresonable to want a break/go away for a weekend she says' Oh now you are trying to twist my words and make out I am the selfish one!! I even resent it now if she sits up late watching TV with us as we seem to get no privacy and pulls faces if she isn't enjoying it. I feel very sad at it all but ashamed to say the person I feel saddest for is myself.