Hi I'm a new member and a full-time care for my mother. My mother who has both physical disabilities and dementia, requires looking after and caring for 24/7. Noticed her dementia gradually getting worse, finding her often mixed up and confused, continually repeating things over and over again where it comes to the point started ignoring it all most of the time and most frustating thing for me, started wanting and seeking attenton all the time, asking somebody(me) to be around her all the time to offer reassurance.
Because of the demands of caring for her 24/7, do need time out if only a few hours in an evening to pursue my own interests which unable to get as my mother quickly gets anxious if not with her, focussing my attention on her. Do get friends and relatives popping in duriing a day to see me and mum but having short term memory problems she can't remember and complains she's on her own all day. I totally enjoy the caring side of things, looking after my mother seeing to her physical needs but her dementia and emotional needs do find that a struggle and a strain.
Noticed through having dementia my mother increasingly depressed. Is this part of the illness, having dementia. Seems fine in a morning, quite cheerful and then observe and notice her demeanour getting worse as we go through the day, ending up being weepy and miserable. This now the general pattern most days and whatever I do or try can't seem to break the trend. Is it a case of being part of her dementia and have to accept it, rather than trying to do something positive to change her behaviour.
Beginning to think about her long-term care, going into a care home, respite for a start then probably full-time as want to pick up my life and probably work again which my mum preventing me from doing at the moment. The problem is having not really worked due to health problems, she has only a small state pension topped up by a little pension credit which in no way would pay for her weekly top-up fee in a care home. My father whom already in a care home has a full state pension and an occupational pension plus savings so able to meet and pay his monthly top-up care home fees. My fear is my mum wouldn't on her small state pension. If the time comes to mum having to go into a care home, can any carer give me some basic advice how she would be able to pay for her top-up fees in a care home just on her small pension and what would happen to me regarding any income coming in while found work again which would not be easy as approaching 60 and slightly disabled. Also regarding caring for someone with dementia, any help and advice how to approach it, caring for someone with the illness. Am a outgoing, positive person with a keen sense of humour but caring for family member, my mother with dementia is testing my resolve and just wondering how others caring for someone with the illness manage to switch off and bring a little normality to their lives which desperately looking for but unable to at present.
Thanks.
Regards,
Keith.
Because of the demands of caring for her 24/7, do need time out if only a few hours in an evening to pursue my own interests which unable to get as my mother quickly gets anxious if not with her, focussing my attention on her. Do get friends and relatives popping in duriing a day to see me and mum but having short term memory problems she can't remember and complains she's on her own all day. I totally enjoy the caring side of things, looking after my mother seeing to her physical needs but her dementia and emotional needs do find that a struggle and a strain.
Noticed through having dementia my mother increasingly depressed. Is this part of the illness, having dementia. Seems fine in a morning, quite cheerful and then observe and notice her demeanour getting worse as we go through the day, ending up being weepy and miserable. This now the general pattern most days and whatever I do or try can't seem to break the trend. Is it a case of being part of her dementia and have to accept it, rather than trying to do something positive to change her behaviour.
Beginning to think about her long-term care, going into a care home, respite for a start then probably full-time as want to pick up my life and probably work again which my mum preventing me from doing at the moment. The problem is having not really worked due to health problems, she has only a small state pension topped up by a little pension credit which in no way would pay for her weekly top-up fee in a care home. My father whom already in a care home has a full state pension and an occupational pension plus savings so able to meet and pay his monthly top-up care home fees. My fear is my mum wouldn't on her small state pension. If the time comes to mum having to go into a care home, can any carer give me some basic advice how she would be able to pay for her top-up fees in a care home just on her small pension and what would happen to me regarding any income coming in while found work again which would not be easy as approaching 60 and slightly disabled. Also regarding caring for someone with dementia, any help and advice how to approach it, caring for someone with the illness. Am a outgoing, positive person with a keen sense of humour but caring for family member, my mother with dementia is testing my resolve and just wondering how others caring for someone with the illness manage to switch off and bring a little normality to their lives which desperately looking for but unable to at present.
Thanks.
Regards,
Keith.
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