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Carers too caring!

spandit

Registered User
Feb 11, 2020
197
0
On Sundays we don't have a great deal of carer cover. We have one in the morning to get him up and dressed, and she comes again in the evening to put him down again. The rest of the day, he has us to assist him when he needs it. Part of his issues are with confidence. His mobility, although not good by "normal" standards, isn't actually that bad, but he acts like he's a paraplegic and completely helpless.

With enough encouragement, he can go up and down stairs without any help. For example, he was sat out in the garden yesterday and took himself inside and upstairs (where his room is), despite repeatedly asking earlier if we had any carers coming in as "he's all on his own" (he lives with us!). We don't want him to lose all of his independence as when he doesn't think about it, he practically springs out of chairs etc.

We noticed last night that when his carer came (and found him downstairs with us), he accepted a lot of help to get him out of his chair, something he's capable of doing by himself. We know it will go against their nature but we need to push the rehab angle, although it's a fine line between watching him struggle and removing his independence.
 

RosettaT

Registered User
Sep 9, 2018
561
0
Mid Lincs
Assuming it's not tiredness causing him to require more help, I would ask the carers to encourage first before immediately helping. It's in my OH's care plan that carers are to encourage before doing it for him, because my OH will do the same.
If you go to help him sit up when in bed he will let you. If I ask him to use his tummy muscles and sit himself up he will do most of the work himself.
OH carers are really good and interactive with him, they will high five or fist pump him when he shows independence and they will give him a little boogie which makes him smile and he will join in with them either swinging his arms if sat or swinging his hips if standing.
 

Weasell

Registered User
Oct 21, 2019
1,282
0
I think what you are dealing with here is the carers risk assess without even knowing they do it.
The mobility of people with dementia can vary so much. My own mother can go from walking independently with a rotator, to beached whale within 24 hours. At this point you are most likely thinking ‘ exaggerating’ but I can only assure you I am not.

The carers will also build sundowning into the calculation.

Then mix in a bit of personal experience ( the time they let the one person stand and they then fell heavily back into the chair and said my back hurts)

No carers want to ‘lift ‘ unless they have to as it is very bad wear and tear on their back, but I suspect they are worried about falls?

I suspect all you can do is rejoice when the good, regular carers arrive and keep promoting the rest! Add diplomacy to that long list of skills, that have me feeling exhausted at the moment!!

I meant to add that I think you are doing so well to be even thinking about the rehab angle, I envy your energy, I congratulate myself for just getting through the day at the moment.
 
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canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
14,915
0
South coast
Hi @spandit - does he have Lewy Body or Parkinsons dementia?
If so, this motor variability is classic. They sort of "freeze" so that they cannot get up out of chairs, up and down stairs and often freeze trying to go through doorways too. And yet, five minutes later they can move around without any problems at all.
 

spandit

Registered User
Feb 11, 2020
197
0
Hi @spandit - does he have Lewy Body or Parkinsons dementia?
If so, this motor variability is classic. They sort of "freeze" so that they cannot get up out of chairs, up and down stairs and often freeze trying to go through doorways too. And yet, five minutes later they can move around without any problems at all.
He has Parkinsons dementia and I know about freezing but at the moment he's having a good run of days and he wasn't freezing at the time. We've made the carers aware of it and today he went outside, which is a rare occurrence. He needs to learn that he is more capable than he thinks (most of the time)
 

LeahDarm

Registered User
Mar 2, 2021
12
0
Try and get a carer to learn his needs completely and ideally have a consistent one who will push him to be mobile. The level of care you get will be hugely impactful on how the condition plays out.