carers refusing to help

[lenhoppy]

Hi
my wife who has alzheimers has lost the use of her legs ,I have injured my back trying to get her on the toilet during then night, she has two carers who call 4 times a day.
When the carers try to lift her out of her seat to go on the commode she stiffens her legs and pushes backwards which makes it very difficult for them control her.
They have been working with her for about a month with this problem and today one of the carers who was a supervisor told me they would not try to put her on the toilet

I asked them how was I to manage by myself? They where all for just leaving her in her wet pants and going.

They just shrugged their shoulders and said it was up to the occupation therapist to find a way. The OT has been on my wife's case for months and cannot solve the problem mean while the caring company cannot offer any suggestions

Which looks like I am going have my wife, who is incontinent, just permanently in her bed in her own mess

I asked surely other dementia patents must have these problems but I am just getting shrugged shoulders

Who can I turn to get help as the situation is critical
I would appreciate any advice

Len

 

[onlyme247]

Len I am so sorry this is so hard for both of you .They should not have left your wife in that way.Please ring the agency as they could have changed your wife by rolling her in the bed.Does she have pads? These can be sorted whilst lay down .Some one else will be able to advise you who to call 're the future care and I am sure they will come along soon to do so.There are solutions even when like now things seem so bad.

 

[nae sporran]

That was my first impression was that you need to get a new care agency Lenhoppy. The second thing was that if the OT cannot help, have you seen a Community Nurse or a District Nurse. The lady at the care support centre who organises the courses said a Community Matron may even be needed if things are really bad, to co-ordinate care, but your GP would be the first point of care.
Hope any of that is helpful.

 

[AlsoConfused]

Please don't put yourself at risk of worse injury by trying to do on your own what 2 carers couldn't manage as a team! Am shocked how uncaring the attitude towards you and your wife has been.

Your wife is obviously at significant risk if she's left wet and dirty so I think you need to stress to all the professionals a solution must be found in the next few hours. Can you speak to the Duty Officer, Adult Social Care, to say the support must be provided else your wife will have to go into hospital or nursing care immediately/ Perhaps the Duty Officer will have some idea which agency has the staff skilled enough to cope?

Good luck, am so sorry to hear about this crisis.

 

[memaggie2]

Hi Len It sounds as though your care workers left a lot to be desired but they are not obliged to put themselves at risk. Generally a no lift policy is used . If they can't encourage your wife to stand safely with assistance ,a hoist should be used or failing that pads would be used and they would be changed in bed.

Just to leave you on your own to cope with this is awful ,as already stated contact the duty officer and say you can't manage ( you shouldn't try too if your backs bad ) they will have to get you appropriate help , a respite and assessment bed may be an idea if this available in your area while a safe way working with your wife is found

good luck

Maggie

 

[Scarlett123]

Len, my heart breaks for you. Where is the compassion from these carers? You've got to raise Cain and contact Social Services. Be polite, but firm. My favourite saying is "with the greatest possible respect ....".

Tell them you are unable to bend, owing to your own ill health, and lifting is out of the question. As your wife cannot be expected to lie in her own waste, indefinitely, and the carers are refusing to help, you are unable to care adequately for your wife, and therefore SS must find a solution, quickly.

Whatever they say that is negative, continue saying "yes, but with the greatest possible respect ...... " and eventually you'll wear them down. Another favourite of mine is "with the great possible respect, we both know that you have a duty of care towards my wife ......"

My name is mud at Social Services, but I got my husband the help he needed. Good Luck Len. You show 'em.

 

[truth24]

Agree with Scarlett. You need to contact SS immediately to get help. They have a START team here with amazing carers. Your wife would be assessed according to her needs and the service is provided FOC for 6 weeks. Then you are referred to an agency for which you have to pay unless your financial assessment says otherwise. I know it's a short time but will help you and they will then be able to help you find an agency with the right expertise to help. In our case it didn't come to that as, after initial cooperation, my OH started behaving with them as he did with me, hated and still hates, having personal care, dressing and undressing etc, but as he too is doubly incontinent it is very necessary, so he is now in residential care but they came in twice a day and were so patient and lovely. Hope your SS can provide that service too.

Sent from my GT-N5110

 

[Chuggalug]

Hi
my wife who has alzheimers has lost the use of her legs ,I have injured my back trying to get her on the toilet during then night, she has two carers who call 4 times a day.
When the carers try to lift her out of her seat to go on the commode she stiffens her legs and pushes backwards which makes it very difficult for them control her.
They have been working with her for about a month with this problem and today one of the carers who was a supervisor told me they would not try to put her on the toilet

I asked them how was I to manage by myself? They where all for just leaving her in her wet pants and going.

They just shrugged their shoulders and said it was up to the occupation therapist to find a way. The OT has been on my wife's case for months and cannot solve the problem mean while the caring company cannot offer any suggestions

Which looks like I am going have my wife, who is incontinent, just permanently in her bed in her own mess

I asked surely other dementia patents must have these problems but I am just getting shrugged shoulders

Who can I turn to get help as the situation is critical
I would appreciate any advice

Len

Len, what we used to do in a nursing home I worked in was to roll the patient onto their side; scrunch, or roll up any soiled bedding, then roll said person the other way to remove the bedding. We naturally had a protector to put in place before the person was rolled back towards us. Then the soiled bedding can be completely taken away for washing. Wash it straight away, along with any soiled clothing, which also must be removed.

If the person cannot be moved, wash them while they are on the bed, like a bed bath. They can then be dressed, and, then pop another blanket/duvet over them for sleeping. Obviously, a clean sheet, with soiling protection over that would also be fitted, again, whilst moving the person from side to side. Of course, when I did this, there were always two of us. That's how these people should be trained. Especially if they are supposed to be carers. Does that not happen? (Shocked look)...