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Carers employed by me advice needed asap please

Cazzita

Registered User
May 12, 2018
578
Hope you get sorted out soon, you have enough problems of your own and it's all exhausting isn't it? I would ask your local council/social services to recommend a care company - mine did and they are absolutely fantastic. I really can't fault them. New care businesses are starting up all the time so you you never know. Mine was a brand new company and they are faultless . Wishing you a lucky break with finding decent carers and I get your point - you have gone down the well worn path of ' reputable care companies' - but have been very unhappy with their services. Some individual carers do adertise on Gumtree or elsewhere, so you never know. Not everyone on Gumtree is bad.
 

deepetshopboy

Registered User
Jul 7, 2008
277
Hope you get sorted out soon, you have enough problems of your own and it's all exhausting isn't it? I would ask your local council/social services to recommend a care company - mine did and they are absolutely fantastic. I really can't fault them. New care businesses are starting up all the time so you you never know. Mine was a brand new company and they are faultless . Wishing you a lucky break with finding decent carers and I get your point - you have gone down the well worn path of ' reputable care companies' - but have been very unhappy with their services. Some individual carers do adertise on Gumtree or elsewhere, so you never know. Not everyone on Gumtree is bad.
Thanks for your positive input im hoping that gumtree might churn out a decent soul
Yes its soul destroying and v v stressful ive had months x 4 no carers i need some me time im actually feeling really down
Ive had to give everything up for my dad and i feel like im getting nowere fast
 

Cazzita

Registered User
May 12, 2018
578
Thanks for your positive input im hoping that gumtree might churn out a decent soul
Yes its soul destroying and v v stressful ive had months x 4 no carers i need some me time im actually feeling really down
Ive had to give everything up for my dad and i feel like im getting nowere fast
You don't know until you try. The agency carers should be brilliant but they are not. The people advertising on Gumtree could possibly be genuine , it's hard to say isn't it? Fingers crossed you find the right kind of people x
 

deepetshopboy

Registered User
Jul 7, 2008
277
You don't know until you try. The agency carers should be brilliant but they are not. The people advertising on Gumtree could possibly be genuine , it's hard to say isn't it? Fingers crossed you find the right kind of people x
Yes that’s right ive already advertised and got some very nice replies so hopefully it will be positive I’ll keep a open mind
Thank you
 

deepetshopboy

Registered User
Jul 7, 2008
277
So I advertised its been very positive today i interveiwed a lovely lady whos got drb and excellent refrences shes friendly educated etc sooo much better then any rubbish agencys ive used also im waiting to interview a nice sounding lady whos a occupational therapist saving to do a masters degree and a nurse also coming the response was large hundreds replied its been exhausting time consuming and very stressful going through cvs etc calling making arrangements yes theres been some dogdy cvs dodgy sounding “carers “who I straight away knew not that serious Or trained to even look after a bag of rubbish or haven't a good intention only interested in money i think ive got sense now after about 30 bad carers from agencys to weed out bad apples and 6 yrs of experience of dementia from mild to mod and all the highs and lows ups and downs of dementia all that comes with it but so many horror stories from agemcys i wish id advertised sooner on gumtree!! would hsve saved my marriage and a yr of hell with so called 5 star agencies outstanding in the community 🙄🙄😡
Anyway thats my story I'm sure very excellent care agencys but none had unfortunately crossed my path just thought id share hopefully i wont get any nasty negative comments just to add anyone will be carefully vettedd I’m not leaving my dad with any old carer all cv drb checked i also have cctv
 

pinkslippers2106

Registered User
Jul 14, 2020
15
Oh golly I so feel your pain :( But I too ended up 'employing' a self employed carer and checking their documents etc myself. But I always paid them by BACS and ensured that at the bottom of their invoices they wrote/typed that they were responsible for their own NI and Tax! I despaired of Agency staff unfortunately. It wasn't their fault but Mum needs consistency of care and times!!!
 

pinkslippers2106

Registered User
Jul 14, 2020
15
Please see below a few pagraphs from my book - hope it helps :)

CHOOSING THE RIGHT CARER FOR YOUR LOVED ONE
So where do you find good-quality caring help?
This is so hard to answer. I got lucky eventually with our lovely Roz. However, I learnt many lessons before I finally struck gold!
Firstly, check with your council about their care provision and what your loved one is entitled to receive. Or, again, visit Age UK.
In order to be heard, screaming and getting angry is unfortunately part of a carer’s lot – as nobody seems to take the blindest bit of notice of you unless you ‘throw your toys out of the pram’. Why should this be the case? Well, it shouldn’t and by my very nature, this totally goes against the grain.
You will need to put your ‘business hat’ on to fight for your relative or friend. Nothing comes easy and nobody tells you what help is available, or more commonly, what help is not available. Sad but true, there is zero money in social care and if you think there is, then please think again.
My experience is that you get pigeon-holed and ‘put into the system’ of various care organisations.


My first port of call was to look on Gumtree for a part-time carer. Please don’t ask me why, but I really didn’t know where else to start. Because social ser- vices ‘daren’t’ offer you practical advice, you really

are left to your own devices. I am guessing it’s the ‘sue’ culture of the UK that means that nobody dare give you advice.
I got many responses to my advert on Gumtree, but one stood out. She didn’t reply to my ad with the usual ‘I’m caring, trustworthy, etc.’. She gave me advice on the ‘Do’s and Don’ts of employing a carer’, including a suggestion that you shouldn’t just employ one carer, but several. Always have a back- up plan!
She got the job. She actually had her own independent care company and employed five carers. She organised the diary and knew who was going to be turning up and when.
What I didn’t do was ask for references – some- thing I really should’ve done and would respectfully suggest you do, no matter how desperate you’re feeling. And I was desperate! I needed help as quickly as possible, especially as Mum was still doubly incontinent thanks to the ‘care home’.

Luckily for me, it worked out quite well for about eight months and Mum had three regular carers. They came in for an hour in the morning and for about 45 minutes in the evening.
Unfortunately for me, this lady’s business grew rapidly. We started getting carers we didn’t know. They didn’t have definite time slots and so we never knew who was coming, or more importantly, when!


I certainly don’t recommend you losing your temper and firing the care company without a back- up plan because you could find yourself entirely on your own. An even worse case scenario – unless you are good at changing ‘nappies’, cleaning teeth and an expert in care of the elderly.

Finding the right carer for you and your loved one is crucial to your survival. Here are my top tips:
  • Does your loved one like them?
  • Always ask for a reference – preferably three
  • Check out their social media profiles to see what they are really like
  • Are they good listeners and can they commu- nicate clearly?
  • What care qualifications do they have?

Do they have their own insurance?
  • Are they DBS (Disclosure and Barring Ser- vice) checked?
  • Do they drive and have the necessary insurance?
  • Do they have a happy disposition? Don’t just take their word for it. Ask for proof.
From your point of view, make sure you write a
list of all the things you want the carer to do – a job description. And make sure you can communicate with each other.
  • Personal care for Mum
  • Making appointments with the dentist etc. and taking Mum there
  • Shopping
  • Taking Mum out shopping, to garden centres, etc.
  • Washing
  • Ironing
  • Cleaning
  • Answering the phones
  • Making meals
  • Chatting with Mum about anything and everything
  • Taking Mum to audiology appointments, etc.
  • Taking Mum for walks
  • Exercises for Mum
You will also need a Care Plan. A Care Plan is a document which clearly states what duties you expect of the carer. It will include:
  • Their name and how they like to be addressed, Mr/Mrs or by their first name
  • Their age and date of birth
  • Home address
  • Their GP’s details – name, address and tele- phone number
  • List of medications
This is followed by a paragraph outlining what you expect of the carer, whether they live with you or in their own home.
In another paragraph, say what is wrong with your loved one – dementia/Alzheimer’s. I would also state here if they have problems with mobility and other issues like hearing aids, false teeth, etc.
Again though I would stress that routine is so very important for their welfare, so a regular time and one carer is perfect. Mum has Roz during the week and Lisa at the weekends and that works per- fectly for all.

Care Book
This is especially important if you have more than one carer. This book will contain any concerns a carer might have, and they can use it to mention any problems or concerns, or indeed anything positive that might have occurred during the day or night. This book will be available to all and any GP callouts etc. I actually use a large diary, which does the job very nicely.
Your loved one must feel safe and secure. Consistency of care, not to mention routine, daily activities and love, are the most important things you can give to someone with dementia. Along with good nutrition, whatever that may be, and lots and lots of liquid.
However, I would sincerely suggest that you don’t put all your eggs in one basket. As my original carer said, always have a back-up plan. She is not wrong, however good your carer is, or indeed how comfortable you feel with them. This advice should be a warning sign – I’d definitely recommend get- ting another carer as a back-up as soon as possible.
Thinking back, I believe the carer who had staff really shouldn’t have taken me and Mum on! Their core business was looking after the elderly who lived on their own, who were just ‘grateful’ that somebody turned up at all!
Some care agencies now have technology that ‘clocks them in and out’, but of course you don’t know what they do when they get there if you aren’t there!
I did find one carer sitting on Mum’s bed texting her friends, whilst Mum was still in the bathroom waiting to be dressed! But that was just one carer and I’m certainly not saying that they are all like that; you just have to be aware and keep your eyes and ears open.

I’ve found that the majority of carers are excellent and do a really fab job, often in difficult circumstances. They certainly deserve far more money and respect than I believe they receive today. I know that I certainly couldn’t cope without them.

However, one bad apple can spoil the bunch!
 

deepetshopboy

Registered User
Jul 7, 2008
277
That sounds really positive @deepetshopboy . Hope you can get them starting very soon.
Thank you im gojng continue with the interviews as if one leaves ill have some spare that ill keep as possible carers if the other one goes on holiday unfortunately as with good carers in big demand she can only do a day so may need to get second carer
 
Last edited:

deepetshopboy

Registered User
Jul 7, 2008
277
Please see below a few pagraphs from my book - hope it helps :)

CHOOSING THE RIGHT CARER FOR YOUR LOVED ONE

So where do you find good-quality caring help?
This is so hard to answer. I got lucky eventually with our lovely Roz. However, I learnt many lessons before I finally struck gold!
Firstly, check with your council about their care provision and what your loved one is entitled to receive. Or, again, visit Age UK.
In order to be heard, screaming and getting angry is unfortunately part of a carer’s lot – as nobody seems to take the blindest bit of notice of you unless you ‘throw your toys out of the pram’. Why should this be the case? Well, it shouldn’t and by my very nature, this totally goes against the grain.
You will need to put your ‘business hat’ on to fight for your relative or friend. Nothing comes easy and nobody tells you what help is available, or more commonly, what help is not available. Sad but true, there is zero money in social care and if you think there is, then please think again.
My experience is that you get pigeon-holed and ‘put into the system’ of various care organisations.



My first port of call was to look on Gumtree for a part-time carer. Please don’t ask me why, but I really didn’t know where else to start. Because social ser- vices ‘daren’t’ offer you practical advice, you really


are left to your own devices. I am guessing it’s the ‘sue’ culture of the UK that means that nobody dare give you advice.
I got many responses to my advert on Gumtree, but one stood out. She didn’t reply to my ad with the usual ‘I’m caring, trustworthy, etc.’. She gave me advice on the ‘Do’s and Don’ts of employing a carer’, including a suggestion that you shouldn’t just employ one carer, but several. Always have a back- up plan!
She got the job. She actually had her own independent care company and employed five carers. She organised the diary and knew who was going to be turning up and when.
What I didn’t do was ask for references – some- thing I really should’ve done and would respectfully suggest you do, no matter how desperate you’re feeling. And I was desperate! I needed help as quickly as possible, especially as Mum was still doubly incontinent thanks to the ‘care home’.

Luckily for me, it worked out quite well for about eight months and Mum had three regular carers. They came in for an hour in the morning and for about 45 minutes in the evening.
Unfortunately for me, this lady’s business grew rapidly. We started getting carers we didn’t know. They didn’t have definite time slots and so we never knew who was coming, or more importantly, when!



I certainly don’t recommend you losing your temper and firing the care company without a back- up plan because you could find yourself entirely on your own. An even worse case scenario – unless you are good at changing ‘nappies’, cleaning teeth and an expert in care of the elderly.

Finding the right carer for you and your loved one is crucial to your survival. Here are my top tips:
  • Does your loved one like them?
  • Always ask for a reference – preferably three
  • Check out their social media profiles to see what they are really like
  • Are they good listeners and can they commu- nicate clearly?
  • What care qualifications do they have?

Do they have their own insurance?
  • Are they DBS (Disclosure and Barring Ser- vice) checked?
  • Do they drive and have the necessary insurance?
  • Do they have a happy disposition? Don’t just take their word for it. Ask for proof.
From your point of view, make sure you write a
list of all the things you want the carer to do – a job description. And make sure you can communicate with each other.
  • Personal care for Mum
  • Making appointments with the dentist etc. and taking Mum there
  • Shopping
  • Taking Mum out shopping, to garden centres, etc.
  • Washing
  • Ironing
  • Cleaning
  • Answering the phones
  • Making meals
  • Chatting with Mum about anything and everything
  • Taking Mum to audiology appointments, etc.
  • Taking Mum for walks
  • Exercises for Mum
You will also need a Care Plan. A Care Plan is a document which clearly states what duties you expect of the carer. It will include:
  • Their name and how they like to be addressed, Mr/Mrs or by their first name
  • Their age and date of birth
  • Home address
  • Their GP’s details – name, address and tele- phone number
  • List of medications
This is followed by a paragraph outlining what you expect of the carer, whether they live with you or in their own home.
In another paragraph, say what is wrong with your loved one – dementia/Alzheimer’s. I would also state here if they have problems with mobility and other issues like hearing aids, false teeth, etc.

Again though I would stress that routine is so very important for their welfare, so a regular time and one carer is perfect. Mum has Roz during the week and Lisa at the weekends and that works per- fectly for all.


Care Book
This is especially important if you have more than one carer. This book will contain any concerns a carer might have, and they can use it to mention any problems or concerns, or indeed anything positive that might have occurred during the day or night. This book will be available to all and any GP callouts etc. I actually use a large diary, which does the job very nicely.

Your loved one must feel safe and secure. Consistency of care, not to mention routine, daily activities and love, are the most important things you can give to someone with dementia. Along with good nutrition, whatever that may be, and lots and lots of liquid.
However, I would sincerely suggest that you don’t put all your eggs in one basket. As my original carer said, always have a back-up plan. She is not wrong, however good your carer is, or indeed how comfortable you feel with them. This advice should be a warning sign – I’d definitely recommend get- ting another carer as a back-up as soon as possible.
Thinking back, I believe the carer who had staff really shouldn’t have taken me and Mum on! Their core business was looking after the elderly who lived on their own, who were just ‘grateful’ that somebody turned up at all!
Some care agencies now have technology that ‘clocks them in and out’, but of course you don’t know what they do when they get there if you aren’t there!
I did find one carer sitting on Mum’s bed texting her friends, whilst Mum was still in the bathroom waiting to be dressed! But that was just one carer and I’m certainly not saying that they are all like that; you just have to be aware and keep your eyes and ears open.

I’ve found that the majority of carers are excellent and do a really fab job, often in difficult circumstances. They certainly deserve far more money and respect than I believe they receive today. I know that I certainly couldn’t cope without them.

However, one bad apple can spoil the bunch!
Unfortunately had 99.8 people bad apples honestly been a living hell dealing with them if dad was in bed just needed personal care be ok I suppose but ye doesn’t hes fit n 70 per cent dementia but rest ok
 

deepetshopboy

Registered User
Jul 7, 2008
277
Please see below a few pagraphs from my book - hope it helps :)

CHOOSING THE RIGHT CARER FOR YOUR LOVED ONE

So where do you find good-quality caring help?
This is so hard to answer. I got lucky eventually with our lovely Roz. However, I learnt many lessons before I finally struck gold!
Firstly, check with your council about their care provision and what your loved one is entitled to receive. Or, again, visit Age UK.
In order to be heard, screaming and getting angry is unfortunately part of a carer’s lot – as nobody seems to take the blindest bit of notice of you unless you ‘throw your toys out of the pram’. Why should this be the case? Well, it shouldn’t and by my very nature, this totally goes against the grain.
You will need to put your ‘business hat’ on to fight for your relative or friend. Nothing comes easy and nobody tells you what help is available, or more commonly, what help is not available. Sad but true, there is zero money in social care and if you think there is, then please think again.
My experience is that you get pigeon-holed and ‘put into the system’ of various care organisations.



My first port of call was to look on Gumtree for a part-time carer. Please don’t ask me why, but I really didn’t know where else to start. Because social ser- vices ‘daren’t’ offer you practical advice, you really


are left to your own devices. I am guessing it’s the ‘sue’ culture of the UK that means that nobody dare give you advice.
I got many responses to my advert on Gumtree, but one stood out. She didn’t reply to my ad with the usual ‘I’m caring, trustworthy, etc.’. She gave me advice on the ‘Do’s and Don’ts of employing a carer’, including a suggestion that you shouldn’t just employ one carer, but several. Always have a back- up plan!
She got the job. She actually had her own independent care company and employed five carers. She organised the diary and knew who was going to be turning up and when.
What I didn’t do was ask for references – some- thing I really should’ve done and would respectfully suggest you do, no matter how desperate you’re feeling. And I was desperate! I needed help as quickly as possible, especially as Mum was still doubly incontinent thanks to the ‘care home’.

Luckily for me, it worked out quite well for about eight months and Mum had three regular carers. They came in for an hour in the morning and for about 45 minutes in the evening.
Unfortunately for me, this lady’s business grew rapidly. We started getting carers we didn’t know. They didn’t have definite time slots and so we never knew who was coming, or more importantly, when!



I certainly don’t recommend you losing your temper and firing the care company without a back- up plan because you could find yourself entirely on your own. An even worse case scenario – unless you are good at changing ‘nappies’, cleaning teeth and an expert in care of the elderly.

Finding the right carer for you and your loved one is crucial to your survival. Here are my top tips:
  • Does your loved one like them?
  • Always ask for a reference – preferably three
  • Check out their social media profiles to see what they are really like
  • Are they good listeners and can they commu- nicate clearly?
  • What care qualifications do they have?

Do they have their own insurance?
  • Are they DBS (Disclosure and Barring Ser- vice) checked?
  • Do they drive and have the necessary insurance?
  • Do they have a happy disposition? Don’t just take their word for it. Ask for proof.
From your point of view, make sure you write a
list of all the things you want the carer to do – a job description. And make sure you can communicate with each other.
  • Personal care for Mum
  • Making appointments with the dentist etc. and taking Mum there
  • Shopping
  • Taking Mum out shopping, to garden centres, etc.
  • Washing
  • Ironing
  • Cleaning
  • Answering the phones
  • Making meals
  • Chatting with Mum about anything and everything
  • Taking Mum to audiology appointments, etc.
  • Taking Mum for walks
  • Exercises for Mum
You will also need a Care Plan. A Care Plan is a document which clearly states what duties you expect of the carer. It will include:
  • Their name and how they like to be addressed, Mr/Mrs or by their first name
  • Their age and date of birth
  • Home address
  • Their GP’s details – name, address and tele- phone number
  • List of medications
This is followed by a paragraph outlining what you expect of the carer, whether they live with you or in their own home.
In another paragraph, say what is wrong with your loved one – dementia/Alzheimer’s. I would also state here if they have problems with mobility and other issues like hearing aids, false teeth, etc.

Again though I would stress that routine is so very important for their welfare, so a regular time and one carer is perfect. Mum has Roz during the week and Lisa at the weekends and that works per- fectly for all.


Care Book
This is especially important if you have more than one carer. This book will contain any concerns a carer might have, and they can use it to mention any problems or concerns, or indeed anything positive that might have occurred during the day or night. This book will be available to all and any GP callouts etc. I actually use a large diary, which does the job very nicely.

Your loved one must feel safe and secure. Consistency of care, not to mention routine, daily activities and love, are the most important things you can give to someone with dementia. Along with good nutrition, whatever that may be, and lots and lots of liquid.
However, I would sincerely suggest that you don’t put all your eggs in one basket. As my original carer said, always have a back-up plan. She is not wrong, however good your carer is, or indeed how comfortable you feel with them. This advice should be a warning sign – I’d definitely recommend get- ting another carer as a back-up as soon as possible.
Thinking back, I believe the carer who had staff really shouldn’t have taken me and Mum on! Their core business was looking after the elderly who lived on their own, who were just ‘grateful’ that somebody turned up at all!
Some care agencies now have technology that ‘clocks them in and out’, but of course you don’t know what they do when they get there if you aren’t there!
I did find one carer sitting on Mum’s bed texting her friends, whilst Mum was still in the bathroom waiting to be dressed! But that was just one carer and I’m certainly not saying that they are all like that; you just have to be aware and keep your eyes and ears open.

I’ve found that the majority of carers are excellent and do a really fab job, often in difficult circumstances. They certainly deserve far more money and respect than I believe they receive today. I know that I certainly couldn’t cope without them.

However, one bad apple can spoil the bunch!
Hi thank you are you writing a book ? Very sound advice ill take some on board
 

Cazzita

Registered User
May 12, 2018
578
Good to hear that you have had lots of applications! Keep us in the loop on how they turn out and good luck :)