I am a residential care home manager i look after 23 residents 6 who have dementia. i was so sad to read how some of you feel about people like myself. I am aware that not all care homes work to a high standard, but most of us do. I am not saying we are perfect but we really try to support relatives as well as our residents to come to terms with their situation. I have a very good relationship with all my relatives. I make sure they are as involved as they want to be. if i can be of any assistance to anyone out there i would be happy to do so. I was also a carer for my husband for 15 years he died on October 2003. i have used respite for him and have been very dissatisfied. It is very hard to hand over your loved one to someone else to look after when you can no longer cope on your own. I no how hard that is.