1. TriciaBee

    TriciaBee Registered User

    Jul 27, 2018
    24
    My husband has been in a Care Home for 9 months. There are 60 people there and most of them are far worse than he is. Some of them have serious mental problems and have been there for over 20 years.
    I am considering moving him to another smaller Care Home, but some people say that that’s not a good idea. Any ideas or opinions please?
     
  2. Splashing About

    Splashing About Registered User

    Oct 20, 2019
    352
    My sister is in a small CH and I love it. It’s like her home. The staff don’t wear uniform and it feels homely.

    When you visit work out what your husband needs and values. What is making you think of leaving?
     
  3. Baker17

    Baker17 Registered User

    Mar 9, 2016
    383
    Is your husband settled where he is? Have you any issues with the care and the management and staff? This is only my opinion of some questions to ask yourself. My husband was moved (against my wishes) and I went through the most horrendous time with him and then where he was moved to decided they couldn’t cope with him needless to say he has had to move AGAIN and there have been problems with him settling. The first place he was was lovely the staff and management were lovely and he was very well cared for and settled so I would have liked him to to stay there but alas the invisibles and the so called professionals decided that he should move. What I have gone through with my husband I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy, so please ask yourself the two questions before making any decisions, good luck with whatever you decide and hope it all works out for you and your husband
     
  4. Louise7

    Louise7 Registered User

    Mar 25, 2016
    1,489
    A change of environment can be unsettling for someone with dementia but it isn't necessarily something that will have long term effects. Why you are considering moving him? Is he settled there and you are happy with the standard of care he is receiving? The fact that people in the home are worse than your husband isn't necessarily a bad thing as it will mean that he may not need to move again in future if his needs increase - some homes will only cope with a certain degree of dementia then ask the resident to leave if they become difficult to manage. The fact that some residents have been there for 20 years is also positive - the home must presumably be doing something right or they wouldn't still be there. My Mum lived in 3 different care homes last year (due to being placed in unsuitable homes by the LA) but is now happily settled in the third home, although it took a while for her to settle. Two were fairly small and the current home is much bigger but small isn't necessarily best - you need to make sure that any home meets your husband's needs now, and also consider whether they could continue to meet his needs in the future. Although some in Mum's home have serious mental health issues they are on a different unit to Mum so maybe a move to a different area of the current home, more suited to your husband's needs, may be possible?
     
  5. Sirena

    Sirena Registered User

    Feb 27, 2018
    1,986
    Female
    As Louise says, it is in some ways a good sign if there are other residents who have more advanced illness, it means your husband will not be asked to leave when he deteriorates. When my mother moved to a care home I thought everyone was more advanced than her, but actually I've come to realise that isn't true.

    Whether it's worth undergoing the disruption of a move depends on the reasons - if your husband moves to somewhere which will better meet his needs, then it's worth it.
     
  6. oliviajuliette

    oliviajuliette Registered User

    Jul 16, 2014
    31
     
  7. oliviajuliette

    oliviajuliette Registered User

    Jul 16, 2014
    31
    I think that if your husband is settled that is the main concern a move to another home may be too stressfull
     
  8. TriciaBee

    TriciaBee Registered User

    Jul 27, 2018
    24
    Thank you all. I am not satisfied with the care my husband is receiving.
    He is not getting enough stimulation. Most of the activities are geared to women. Nails, hair, flower arranging. Obviously these activities don’t put much stress on the staff. There are occasionally entertainments but not often enough.
    Most of the residents are women of course. The men seem to be in their rooms or sleeping in the public rooms.
    Most of the residents I see are just staring into space. I have watched my husband deteriorating in just 9 months and see others deteriorating too. I am going to see another Care Home tomorrow it has received CQC Outstanding on last two inspections. Advice/comments, would be very welcome.
     
  9. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    11,099
    Female
    South coast
    Deterioration with dementia is inevitable. No amount of stimulation will prevent it and sometimes there can be problems due to overstimulation. What sort of things is he still able to do? When you go and see the new home think about whether your husband would actually still be able to do them.
    When mum moved into her care home she could do things like word searches and musical bingo, but by the end she could not join in any of the activities. Eventually just watching the world go by will be enough stimulation.
     

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