Care home want to move mum against wishes of family - can they??

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by Martin099, Jan 21, 2015.

  1. Martin099

    Martin099 Registered User

    Nov 13, 2012
    53
    Dorset
    Just returned home feeling very angry following a visit to mum at the care home - the home manager spoke to me tonight to say that they intend to move mum in to a more high needs quarter of the home based on her "nursing care needs".
    Mum is 71 with vascular dementia and has been in the home for 7 months now since her knee op in June 14. The home only opened in Apr 14 and up to now they have not segregated residents on the basis of how advanced their dementia is, how mobile they are or on any other basis.
    Mum has eventually started to settle reasonably well and enjoys the company and social interaction with 'some' of the other residents. However now the CH want to move mum upstairs as they open up the whole home and start to segregate residents based on needs. ALL of the other residents moving upstairs have virtually zero capacity to communicate or interact socially. If mum were to be moved then she would lose this interaction, which is pretty much all my poor mum has left in her life, and the decline in her mental capability would only speed up i'm sure. The reason they want to move mum is because she is very resistant to personal care, washing & pad-changing etc, but apart from that (which can be contained in her bedroom) she is very calm and is generally an easy person to care for. The CH are saying this is due to her "nursing needs" based on their assessment....but where do you draw the line between nursing needs and normal dementia care needs?? The only nursing they do for mum is administration of tablets.
    The reality is that the CH are making things better and more convenient for "THEM", and not taking in to consideration quality of life for MUM. We pay over £50k a year for mum to be looked after and for her quality of life to be maintained as high as possible. We don't pay £50k a year for the CH to make things easier for themselves, to maximise occupancy or improve their margins. Arghh this makes my blood boil!
    Right now not sure what to do, as a family we have battled for the past 5 years to look after mum, physically and mentally, and it just makes me so angry that a private home can make this kind of decision so lightly without consideration for my mums quality of life.
    Tomorrow I will contact the CQC to get their views but I would really appreciate views from any of you that may have experienced similar situations?
    Thanks for reading.
    Martin
     
  2. loveahug

    loveahug Registered User

    Nov 28, 2012
    1,071
    Moved to Leicester
    to be honest, reading between the lines, I would think they need to fulfil their business model and moving your mum to the 'nursing' section means they can get the nursing contribution from the NHS. I, too, would be very angry if they intend to reduce your mother's quality of life and think a complaint to the CQC and a threat to remove your mum to a better care environment might make them think again. All too often our loved ones are just a room income on a budget spreadsheet, that is all :mad:

    The frustrations and battles never stop do they? Good luck x
     
  3. I suppose the bottom line is that it depends on the written contract between you. I'd be surprised if there weren't some good get-out clauses for them.
     
  4. Chemmy

    Chemmy Registered User

    Nov 7, 2011
    7,592
    Yorkshire
    I'm not convinced that it matters where her bedroom is and maybe they can deal with her personal care better in another part of the building, but I think you should insist that your mum is given similar opportunities for social interaction she has now.

    In both my mum's and MIL CHs, they ring the changes, with residents being moved around the various lounges, upstairs and down. This allows them to interact with (even if it's just listening) to different residents and a change of scene.

    Although I was concerned with Mum being in with non-talking ones from time to time when she first moved in there as she seemed so much more able than them, when it got to the stage that she was unable to speak herself, I was really grateful for this policy. The days are long enough without any chit chat going on around you. I don't believe that the non-speaking ones should be herded in together 'out of the way' and would be concerned at a CH which did this.

    Just being cynical for a moment...maybe this 'tidying up' makes the downstairs area more attractive to prospective families?
     
  5. Martin099

    Martin099 Registered User

    Nov 13, 2012
    53
    Dorset
    Interesting point about the 'tidying up'...there is definitely something in that. The downstairs area where mum is currently located is the first 'community' you come to after walking through reception. It will become the 'showhome' area i'm sure. At the end of the day we're all seen as 'customers' to whom they try to pitch their product, whilst maximising their margins. This is then balanced with the need to 'tick boxes' in line with CQC requirements - god i'm becoming cynical now. I think I need to cheer myself up!:)
     
  6. Witzend

    Witzend Registered User

    Aug 29, 2007
    4,289
    SW London
    There are frequently confused people in the entrance to my mother's CH, sometimes looking lost or asking anyone if they can take them home. But one such incident at the entrance only confirmed to me how good the dementia home is. A tiny little old lady I didn't know, since she's in a different section from my mother, came up looking worried, and said, 'can you help me please?' So of course I said I would, but within seconds one of the assistant managers came out of the office, which is largely glass so they can see what is going on.
    He is a huge big black chap with a very kind and jolly smile, and the instant she saw him the little old lady said, 'Oh! he'll look after me!' and he said, 'of course I will,' and led her off with an arm around her.

    I don't mind admitting I went upstairs to my mother with tears in my eyes.
     
  7. Chemmy

    Chemmy Registered User

    Nov 7, 2011
    7,592
    Yorkshire
    And that speaks volumes about the care on offer, Witzend. Far more than fancy decor.

    I had the opposite experience about three years ago when I went to look at a new one with a dementia wing with a view to possibly moving my mum nearer me.

    There was a lady just inside the door who had clearly soiled herself and was very distressed. The receptionist from 'downstairs' was clearly horrified and called for a care assistant who made all the right noises in front of me.

    However, 15 mins later, we passed the same old lady, who had clearly been abandoned by the carer as soon as I was out of sight. She was still wandering about in the same soiled clothes, begging for help, visibly distressed. That told me all I needed to know about the place and my mum stayed where she was.

    In hindsight, I should have reported it to someone.
     

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