I am new to this forum, so I hope I’m posting this in the right place! I’ve been reading the threads to do with care home decisions, but wanted to know if anyone had any experience of, or advice on 24-hour care at home as an alternative. We’re in a situation whereby Mum (87) has been in the local care home since October, which was only intended to be a couple of weeks or so while Dad was there for respite following a hospital stay for Parkinsons-related problems. Sadly Dad passed away in November, and we were worried about Mum being alone at home (old farm cottage, fairly remote), more because of her physical problems (osteo-arthritis) and being at risk of falling than her dementia at the time, so we felt it was the safest place for her. We chose the home because they’d both visited it before, Dad was there, it was local (which meant friends and family could easily visit), and it was intended to be temporary. However, bereavement has accelerated Mum’s dementia. She’s grieving for Dad and for her home, and is increasingly anxious, distressed and muddled about everything and is very unhappy there. They lived a fairly solitary life on the farm, without hobbies or social life (apart from church), and the “activities” at the home do not interest her. Her eyesight and hearing are poor, which makes any social activity even harder. The only thing that keeps her going is being able (with help) to have a walk outside every day. Most of the staff are well-intentioned, but do not appear to be tuned into her dementia in terms of taking the time to talk to her gently and explain what is going on. For much of the day she feels she is just waiting in for staff who have said they will come back “in a minute” but then don’t. She has various physical issues, including medications (which she can no longer manage herself), that need attending to several times a day, so that together with her confusion and unsteadiness on her legs (particularly at night) means that our choices are really only a care home or 24-hour live-in care back at home. I live 3 hours away; my brother is local and manages to rearrange his work to take her to her (many) medical appointments, but cannot care for her. Mum’s anxiousness and frustration manifests itself in total negativity about everyone and everything. Communicating with her is very stressful and exhausting, and we’re not wholly convinced that even the most patient single carer would be able to cope with looking after her at home. However, it would give her the 1 to 1 attention that she needs (a constant complaint at the moment is that nobody understand or listens to her, or has time for her), and it would mean she was in her own home again. We feel we should perhaps give it a go for her sake. The risk of course is that she channels all her negativity against any live-in carer and will hate them and hate them being there in her home; also that the dementia will accelerate to the point where we may have to move her again anyway. Has anyone tried out live-in care for someone with dementia?