Care home visitor lockdown

anxious annie

Registered User
Jan 2, 2019
590
So sad @Kellyr
I had a couple of visits when I was up a couple of weekends ago, and no masks needed. Plus my daughter allowed too. The care home manager thinks residents family visits are vital and was saying indoor visits next month, but her hands may be tied after the stricter measures throughout the county.
I still emailed her MP this morning as he ignored my questions in his reply to me yesterday. I don't mention the name of mum's care home as I know, compared to many she is relatively well off, and I don't want the manager to get in trouble for being more lenient than some.
I'm fighting for others who have less contact, and for when the situation deteriorates at mums home, which I expect it will.
Am enraged by the post on Rights for Residents, showing that Johns campaign and supporters " have been left spitting with anger after the Government responded to a legal challenge regarding restrictions over care home visits with a letter saying it was too busy dealing with the corona virus pandemic to consider their points"
I think the Government is dragging things out in the hope pandemic will be over before they have to address this.
 

PandA4T

Registered User
Aug 14, 2016
11
Oxfordshire
I return again in tears after see my wife in her care home. I've had to look at a distance into those confuse frightened eyes. With poor vision and dementia she struggle to make sense of the world. Who is this masked and maybe threatening stranger? One touch of the hand would reassure her and fill me with joy.
Why are we being tortured? I'm less of a threat than the carers, being in enforced self isolation.
Please sign the petition :-
https://petition.parliament.uk/petitions/318403
If we can get tested maybe we can hold hands again, before we both walk into the sunset.
 

Baker17

Registered User
Mar 9, 2016
775
I can’t believe what I have just seen and heard on look north on the BBC, The CQC have said that their inspectors can carry out home inspections but they don’t need to be weekly tested because they aren’t “hands on” to quote. They’re moving from home to home, I only want the right to visit one person in one home and seemingly the likes of me and all others on here are being denied to right to visit our loved ones.
 

anxious annie

Registered User
Jan 2, 2019
590
Signed @PandA4T
This is just unbelievable @Baker17
I shall be emailing DHSC in the morning, tho have just received a response to an email sent previously saying because of large numbers they are receiving they can only provide an individual response to the most serious and urgent!!
It goes on to say if you consider your situation to be particularly sensitive etc please submit your email again using Sensitive and quote the case reference in the subject line . The department will , if it is deemed appropriate , aim to send a response to the majority of such correspondence within 18 working days.
Well, that's an easy way to ignore those "difficult" questions!!
 

Hayley JS

Registered User
Feb 20, 2020
177
Signed, there are 953 signatures, it needs 100k to be reviewed in parliament, I'm wondering if this will be picked up by one of the campaigns....
 

Kellyr

Registered User
Aug 8, 2020
101
I just signed but stiĺl waiting for confirmation email. Seems odd so few signatures. Will be interesting to see if the email actually arrives...
 

Kellyr

Registered User
Aug 8, 2020
101
So sad @Kellyr
I had a couple of visits when I was up a couple of weekends ago, and no masks needed. Plus my daughter allowed too. The care home manager thinks residents family visits are vital and was saying indoor visits next month, but her hands may be tied after the stricter measures throughout the county.
I still emailed her MP this morning as he ignored my questions in his reply to me yesterday. I don't mention the name of mum's care home as I know, compared to many she is relatively well off, and I don't want the manager to get in trouble for being more lenient than some.
I'm fighting for others who have less contact, and for when the situation deteriorates at mums home, which I expect it will.
Am enraged by the post on Rights for Residents, showing that Johns campaign and supporters " have been left spitting with anger after the Government responded to a legal challenge regarding restrictions over care home visits with a letter saying it was too busy dealing with the corona virus pandemic to consider their points"
I think the Government is dragging things out in the hope pandemic will be over before they have to address this.
Just saw this post @anxious annie youre so lucky your manager is sympathetic. Our one is the exact opposite. Found out the other day that they have stopped video calls and even photos - something to do with whatsapp/facebook and privacy.?? Havent been allowed to look through the window for months either. Not even sure if all this is even legal! The way the government are ignoring this is disgraceful and saying theyre 'dealing with the pandemic' as if this problem is unrelated is a joke! Just have to keep plugging away I guess..
 

Kellyr

Registered User
Aug 8, 2020
101
Well this is strange, I just signed another government petition to see how soon the confirmation email would turn up and it came straight away. Still waiting for the carehomes one
 

anxious annie

Registered User
Jan 2, 2019
590
So sorry to hear @Kellyr that your care home manager is not at all sympathetic. I'm sure the least they could do is email how your mum is keeping and send photos of her. My mums home has a Facebook page (open to friends and family only), I had to sign a form saying I was happy to allow photos of mum to be uploaded. It has been so useful (even before covid) to see mum on photos and video clips , as I live away and was only seeing her every two months.
I do hope that you can suggest a "disclaimer" letter to the home so they can share photos for you X
 

Louise7

Registered User
Mar 25, 2016
2,578
It was announced this morning that 11,000 ipads are being provided to care homes 'as a gateway for residents to connect with loved ones'. We tried a couple of video calls to mum at the very start of lockdown but it ended up being too confusing for her as she kept looking round to see where I was :(

 

anxious annie

Registered User
Jan 2, 2019
590
Not much use for many residents with advancing dementia @Louise7
My mum is still able to use FaceTime, which the home do already , but I know many struggle with this.
I have just used the link on @Palerider thread to write to two at the House of Lords, tried to choose ones I thought had an interest , doing this as my MP is very unsympathetic
www.writetothem.com
 

Baker17

Registered User
Mar 9, 2016
775
It was announced this morning that 11,000 ipads are being provided to care homes 'as a gateway for residents to connect with loved ones'. We tried a couple of video calls to mum at the very start of lockdown but it ended up being too confusing for her as she kept looking round to see where I was :(

@Louise7 i couldn’t believe this when I saw it. My husband would have absolutely no understanding about using this😡. Due the non visiting he has now been admitted to an assessment unit because of his deterioration, it might sound odd but I’m actually pleased about this. Why? Because I can visit him inside as many times a week as I like. They’ve even him had out for a walk today and are planning to take him out for a drive this week. I can’t believe the difference in the way they are operating putting the needs of the person first! I hope he stays there for a good while.
 

Just me

Registered User
Nov 17, 2013
488
I’ve withdrawn my previous post as my intention was not to upset anyone.

I do understand how awful the lack of visits is and am doing what I can to campaign for change.
 
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Baker17

Registered User
Mar 9, 2016
775
Perhaps the link @Louise7 provided is to help care homes offer an alternative to actual face to face meetings.

From what I’ve researched the PWD wouldn’t be expected to use the iPad, it would be there for care home to help family and friends maintain contact in these unprecedented times.

I am not tech savvy by any means as I spend all of my time, night and day looking after mum, but to know there was some different means of communication would help. although it is by no means what I would want. You have to be pragmatic but I know it’s hard.

I’ll add that I’m impressed that reading numerous contributions by @Louise7 she appears so experienced and up to date with all the changes and that she’s is just trying to keep us abreast of developments,
@Just me, yes I know that the residents wouldn’t be operating them. But my husband can’t understand the television now, and doesn’t understand why I was at the other side of a window so there would be no chance of him looking and concentrating on an i pad. There have been many helpful contributions from people on this forum, but, unfortunately it hasn’t made the government rethink how we can all visit and help care for our relatives as we all did before.
There have also been petitions and the legal challenge form John’s Campaign which the government has said it’s too busy with Covid to give time to.
Many of our loved ones will sadly die before we can hug them, hold their hands, give them a kiss, and believe me it’s breaking my heart seeing the downturn in my husband.
 

Sarah1208

Registered User
Jun 22, 2020
96
@Just me, yes I know that the residents wouldn’t be operating them. But my husband can’t understand the television now, and doesn’t understand why I was at the other side of a window so there would be no chance of him looking and concentrating on an i pad. There have been many helpful contributions from people on this forum, but, unfortunately it hasn’t made the government rethink how we can all visit and help care for our relatives as we all did before.
There have also been petitions and the legal challenge form John’s Campaign which the government has said it’s too busy with Covid to give time to.
Many of our loved ones will sadly die before we can hug them, hold their hands, give them a kiss, and believe me it’s breaking my heart seeing the downturn in my husband.
 

Sarah1208

Registered User
Jun 22, 2020
96
It’s breaking my heart too. Every word you have written is correct. My mum is going downhill daily. I long to hold her and if nothing else let her know that I love her. If things carry on like this I don’t think my mum will last the winter, and she will die with the thoughts that her family who she adores have forgotten her. Just not sure how I will ever live with that. If I could bring her home I would do it in a heartbeat.