Care Home Problems

[Di*]

Also I got Essential Caregiver status and when I went into the home and saw what went on I was more horrified. Plenty of staff sitting round in groups chatting to each other while the residents sat dozing Continually. Activities organiser doing nothing. Made it more urgent to get hubby out

 

[Sunshine2*]

Also I got Essential Caregiver status and when I went into the home and saw what went on I was more horrified. Plenty of staff sitting round in groups chatting to each other while the residents sat dozing Continually. Activities organiser doing nothing. Made it more urgent to get hubby out

Hello,
So sorry about everything you’ve both had to go through and I can truly understand your situation.

My husband went into temporary respite for two weeks. Within a few days there, he had a fall and cut his head on their radiator. I wasn’t informed until he was admitted to hospital a few days after the fall, having suffered two massive seizures. He hadn’t had a seizure for 24 years. (They only made a telephone call to their local team and he wasn’t seen after the fall). In view of his medical history, I told the respite place, I would have called an ambulance to be assessed by paramedics).

I burst into tears at the hospital, as he was now unable to speak, he couldn’t move his right side (arm, hand and leg), was staring at the ceiling and was now nil by mouth.

The hospital staff have given him wonderful care and he is making progress, although he isn’t mobile yet.

A few years back he went into respite care and was admitted to hospital after a massive fall and 18cm x 8cm bruising to his tummy area.

I am now very wary of him going into respite again. However, I do realise there are some brilliant care places out there…

I have cared for him for 31 years, through Aplastic Anaemia, a brain haemorrhage, epilepsy, Multiple Sclerosis for 26 years, a suspected mini stroke and MS Dementia for around 10 years. I care for him 24/7; hence the need for some much needed respite care.

I send you my best wishes.

 

[Mitsi]

Hi I’m new to this forum
My MIL was admitted to hospital two weeks ago with mobility deterioration. She was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s dementia 6 years ago although she has had problems much longer than this. Today a therapist phoned and said she is medically well all tests investigations prove this and now we need to have a meeting to discuss her further care. She more or less told us her care is out of our hands as we don’t have health power of attorney only finance and that it looks like she will be forced into care for which she will be self funding. We were informed she would need an EMI home. Can anyone please please advise what this is. She is not violent or aggressive but has just recently become incontinent. I am so sad my oh and I have with the help of Carer’s this past 6 years managed everything and now it looks like we have no say.

 

[canary]

Hello @Mitsi and welcome to Talking Point

My mum went into and EMI home (otherwise known as a Dedicated Dementia home) and was very well looked after. Its a home that deals exclusively with dementia and there is usually more staff who are better trained and have more experience of dementia. Lots of residential homes wont accept people in the more advanced stages of dementia who have mobility problems, are incontinent, or who wander. You dont have to have aggression to be there and the vast majority of residents do not.

Usually hospitals and Social Services try everything to keep people in their own home, so if they are saying that your MIL has to move into an EMI home then her dementia must be pretty advanced. Please do not worry too much about this move. It took my mum a couple of months to settle (and it will probably be the same for your MIL), but once she had settled she thrived and was happy there - it was the best thing for her. She once said to me "everybody here loves me" and she was right, they did.

 

[Reeta]

Morning all, sorry for stealing this post to highlight the issue that i am currently having with my dad, 83, who is diagnosed with mixed Alzheimer's and vascular dementia.
He is currently admitted into the hospital after having 2 nasty falls in one night. He is well enough (medically wise) to go home but i am really concerned about his well-being even with a care package in place as he needs 24 hours supervision which a family member (who has been his main carer) isn't going to manage. I am worried sick thinking what will happen if the SS (who has the residential/nursing care home referral from the hospital therapy team) can't find a place that meets my dad's needs sooner and the hospital can't keep him for longer due to bed shortages?

My dad's issue of placement is known by the local council for some time and although he now has a dedicated caseworker, the progress with getting a financial assessment (he will be self-funding to start with) done has been ever so slow.

Thank you,

 

[Mitsi]

Thank you Canary for your thoughtful reply. MIL is still in hospital. social worker said it was out of our hands but we then had a meeting with the hospital staff , social worker and OT. After listening to us they all agreed she should be given the chance to go home and see how things go. However, because of Social Worker originally stating she would need 24 hour care, bearing in mind she had only met Met mum twice , we lost the slots with the Care Company and now struggling to get any other company to take her. I feel very angry, someone who doesn’t know her can come along and in my opinion ruin what is left of the rest of her life. She was very comfy and cosy in her little bungalow. All safety precautions we put in place even her OT would come out and see how things were and praise us. I,m just not sure what happens now. If anyone can give us advice on where we stand with SS and how much rights they have or what we can do I would be so grateful

 

[Mitsi]

Hi thought I would give an update. MIL still in hospital. After many calls to a variety of care companies we still could not get any home help despite being self funding. Situation has deteriorated further. Another meeting weeks later and she now has to go into residential care. There are no places for her and now whilst in hospital in the rehab unit she has caught Covid. We can,t visit but were told she is displaying no symptoms and just wants to sleep. Oh and guess what the Social Worker has now left, moved on to another job leaving us in this predicament.

 

[dj023707bobo]

`Hubby was taken into hospital for assessment for a month and the care he received was outstanding. The hospital were in constant contact , firstly finding out all about him, his history, likes, dislikes, the lot.

Then he has been moved to a care home. He has been there a month and my last visit he looked so neglected that I was shocked. I didn't recognise him, until he spoke. He hadn't had a shave for about a week (and I used to let him go about 4 days before spending some time cajoling him into a shave, so know what 4 days growth looks like) he was in pyjamas, no slippers, his nails needed cutting and he wasn't wearing his hearing aid ... again!

I've been in touch with the CPN and the Home Manager and told them I was very concerned about the neglect that I could see and was now worried about what I couldn't see. They are being addressed, but quite honestly I can't find any reason for it that is acceptable. I'm taking it further with Safeguarding and CQC.

I'm constantly asking about the hearing aid and off the staff disappear to look and never reappear. When I was talking about it they said he didn't arrive at the home from the hospital with his hearing aid, but I've seen it in at least once ... and I've seen a different one in once .. and thought that he had been taken to audiology and received a new one ... but now realise it must be someone's elses

Has anyone had this happen and how did you resolve it and how.

I'd be very glad of your input.

 

[dj023707bobo]

`Hubby was taken into hospital for assessment for a month and the care he received was outstanding. The hospital were in constant contact , firstly finding out all about him, his history, likes, dislikes, the lot.

Then he has been moved to a care home. He has been there a month and my last visit he looked so neglected that I was shocked. I didn't recognise him, until he spoke. He hadn't had a shave for about a week (and I used to let him go about 4 days before spending some time cajoling him into a shave, so know what 4 days growth looks like) he was in pyjamas, no slippers, his nails needed cutting and he wasn't wearing his hearing aid ... again!

I've been in touch with the CPN and the Home Manager and told them I was very concerned about the neglect that I could see and was now worried about what I couldn't see. They are being addressed, but quite honestly I can't find any reason for it that is acceptable. I'm taking it further with Safeguarding and CQC.

I'm constantly asking about the hearing aid and off the staff disappear to look and never reappear. When I was talking about it they said he didn't arrive at the home from the hospital with his hearing aid, but I've seen it in at least once ... and I've seen a different one in once .. and thought that he had been taken to audiology and received a new one ... but now realise it must be someone's elses

Has anyone had this happen and how did you resolve it and how.

I'd be very glad of your input.

Yes it’s been the same for my husband, I’ve been fighting this battle for months . I will not back down my husband has deteriorated terribly.

 

[dj023707bobo]

Yes it’s been the same for my husband, I’ve been fighting this battle for months . I will not back down my husband has deteriorated terribly.

I found him with 11 items of woman’s clothes in his wardrobe I’ve complained kept buying him more and more pants as his kept disappearing. I’ve complained over and over again . Yesterday it was gone 11:30 a.m and Dave still had pyjamas on . No socks and very cold and every time I go in his eyes are full of sleep I clean away.