Care home lockdown

Josb

New member
Apr 18, 2020
1
0
I have recently joined the group, and would like to share with you ,how i am finding it very difficult to understand the somewhat double standards , and the unfairness now happening in the care sector . I am not permitted to visit my mother who has dementia , and has been living in her carehome for a year , i have visited every day in that time, and my sister three times a week, ( before that caring for my mother in her own home for 10 years,) I am presently only permitted to wave to her at the window , mums room is on the first floor, so she cannot hear what i am saying to her either, (the staff kindly open the window for her, but there is an opening of about 3 inches , as it has a safety catch on it. ) Mum is hard of hearing , so telephoning is not an option, I fully understand lockdown is necessary , there to protect the residents ,and staff ,and thier families from this awful virus, but surely with the right precautions , including ,ie, temp testing , PPe etc, exceptions and compassion needs could be considered ,maybe just for one hour ,one nominated - family member , a couple of times a week , pre -planned with the home. I see the pain and anguish each evening as i wave to my mum as she dosent understand why her family have abandoned her , this is killing me and her. Even more upsetting is the fact that am a very experienced and highly skilled long serving ,local authority support worker , (now being classed as a critical care worker ) ! .,expected as of next week , to work in a local care home , (supporting their staff) which i am obviously willing to do. This however will be done without me being tested first for the virus !! , i really am finding this whole thing very frustrating and strange, the stress this is having a very negative effect on my own health. This morning i recieved a call from the care home , as my mum had a fall, at 1 am this morning, paramedics were called , thankfully nothing broken, so you can imagine how i am now feeling right now , im desperate, i appreciate there must be many other families going through a similar nightmare.
 

Wildflowerlady

Registered User
Sep 30, 2019
1,103
0
I have already posted on this thread but have just been catching up on later posts.
However distressing it is becoming not being able to visit our loved ones I absolutely agree visiting is just too risky.
My dad has carers go into his home daily its a risk we've had to accept but although dad lives close and I do drop off his Wiltshire meals and basic grocery's there is no way I will enter his home and although strongly advised not to there isn't much to stop sister and I going into his home if we really wanted to.
I ring ahead to make sure carer is there to take supply's in.
Dad is obviously not happy and has shouted a bit on phone sometimes disconnecting the call as he's not understanding the lack of physical contact but I just cannot risk going in not just for dads sake but carers their family, my own partner who is quite vulnerable and even myself.
I think all anyone can do is wait it out and pray we all come through this terrible time.
It is obvious from the more recent news reports that sadly many deaths are now happening in the care sector I don't know how dads risk being in his own home is with 4 daily visits compared to being in a Care Home but unfortunately it was the best place for him to be.
Sending Love to everyone x
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
25,081
0
South coast
Yes, these are strange times and it is very difficult @Josb , but we need to keep our loved ones in care homes as safe as possible. Unfortunately, someone can have the virus without showing symptoms, or it can be brought in on clothes, or maybe not everyone is as scrupulous about hand washing as maybe thry aught to be. Every time someone goes into a care home it is like Russian roulette - will this person be the one to bring in the virus? The fewer people who go into the care home, the less likely it will be for the virus to come too. You have to have staff going in, but other people have to stopped, however hard it is on them.
 

northumbrian_k

Volunteer Host
Mar 2, 2017
4,500
0
Newcastle
As one who is in the same situation I can only agree with what others have said about respecting care home lockdowns. I understand that it can be distressing @Josb but it is not correct to say that the necessary separation is "killing" you or your mother. Breaking the lockdown, however, might end up killing not just her but others too. Nobody wants lockdown but sometimes we have to accept that things are done for the greater good. I hope that this helps.
 
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Jale

Registered User
Jul 9, 2018
1,148
0
I understand what you are saying, but I for one would not be happy if my mum's nursing home started to let visitors in during the lockdown, other than for end of life visit. Mum's home went into lockdown before the government put the country into it, I haven't seen my mum since the beginning of March as I wasn't well (nothing to do with the virus) and then the home locked down. I miss seeing her as we used to visit every day, but I would much rather her be as safe as she can be than for her and the carers to be put at risk by a member of the public