Can I ... Should I?
- Thread starter Sam Luvit
- Start date
Morning Margi
Thought I'd break this up into bite sized bits .... not got long as should be getting ready for work ....
Lol, mum would be the same if she thought of putting up a picture, so has not been allowed near any DIY for years. I've done all that stuff for mum & dad, now just for mum, for about 10 years. I'm pretty handy with a drill
On the subject of the house ... I would suggest getting a valuation "as is" and a projected valuation after all the work is done. Then get quotes and see if it's worth doing.
Basically, if the cost if works is £10k and the increase in value is £12k, you only come out with an extra £2k, which ends up going to care fees, with you having to find the money first. (You should be able to recover the £10k from the sale as it was in her interest to have the work done, but check that out).
I'd bought my house as a "project" and had spent a fair amount of cash & time sorting it out, but sold as "on going prefect" as unfinished. An extra £5k would have increased £35k, but I made the decision I was needed here more than I needed the cash. (One of my difficult choices).
I'm sorry to say damp proofing, wet rot & flat roof are all expensive & not within DIY, so you will need a few quotes.
If you go for the sold as is, get several quotes for the work, take it into consideration, get print outs of similar properties in the area in excellent condition and use as bargaining points to NOT drop the price. Most likely a builder would be interested as he/ she would only cost materials, but you may find someone who falls in love with the shape, space or location & has the ability & cash to work on it
I used Purple B****s and used their option to do all the viewings. He sorted open house viewings & it was "under offer" in the first week. The horrendous delays were caused by silly negotiations (which PB helped me with) and the buyers solicitor. The legal fees were fixed & less than I'd paid to buy it!!!!
I'm just making a suggestion based on what I did. Feel free to tell me to take a running jump, long walk off short pier etc
I'll post again later, but now late
Sam
Here again Sam
Well saga of the house !! Brother rang and seen estate agent and solicitor and told them to reduce price of house to cover the costs of repairs. £7,000 .
Brother says he is finding this so stressful lol !!!!
He wants to come over to where we live and wear my ******* shoes !!
Making my way down your posts to answer ha ha
To be continued
Save me a sun lounger, mines a double
I will save you a sunbed definitely with a large double
..... and I'm back lol
The retail park by us is closed due to damage from the winds, so had to go to the other one & it was heaving
Hey ho
I doubt if mum would know where the animals came from pre dementia, mind you, I probably don't either. Apart from elephants & kangaroos, it's not my area of knowledge lol
Mum was supposed to be on a low dose preventative AB's since April according to the hospital yesterday .... hmmmm .... so an appointment is to be made & I'll be asking about a few other things, including assessment etc
The LPA arrived last week, but we also had visitors, so I put it in the office to deal with. Couldn't find it yesterday so asked mum. She put it in the box with her Will ???? Wanted to know why I wanted it
Not even 16.30 and I'm ready for my bed. It's been a long week & it's only Tuesday
At least the wind has dropped a bit
Sam
Done the supermarket shop, delivered all mums goodies
She was pleased to see me, told me yet again that she wishes she was gone and then I wouldn't have all this to do !! Told her that was silly and that would be no good to me as I need her and love her.
Just as a suggestion, every time you think of something to ask them i.e. Doctor or hospital or memory clinic write down on a note pad.
You should see the faces of all the ones I've listed when I go armed with my list !!
Then I don't leave, get home and think, I forgot to ask .....
Have not sorted LPA yet, that is another thing for me to do
It's been a long day here too !!
Mum just rang me, she has broke the Xmas tree I bought her last year and now putting her decorations up !!!!
I knew her taking down October and November calander would bring this !!!
Off to supermarket again tomorrow for a tree !!!
Mum is pretty much on the "I shouldn't be here" a lot these days. I've told her not to be silly, she needs to hang around for 20 or 30 years while I get back on my feet
I do hate it when she talks of dying & she should be dead. What can I say? I've taken to giving her a hug and telling her it's going to be ok. Both know it's not going to be ok. She knows better than me
. Def a time when a bit of knowledge is not good, with her it's a lot of knowledge as she was a dementia / Alz nurse for many years. To "know" what is coming for her must be so damn hardTrust me, my memory is sooooo useless, I'm a list person, so I always have a notebook. Sometimes I have a list on my hand, so I can't forget to take the list
I did the LPA on line, it's not so bad. I put carp in the bits I needed to look up, with a note of the section so I could go back and change. It meant I could do the whole form & then look for info
Do put a second attorney, even if it is an invisible. If you get hit by the damn bus & your mum has no capacity, there is no way of doing the LPA again. It is belt n braces! Also, if your mum will agree, get a non charging person to witness, or get a quote for their signature. Mum refused to allow anyone other than doc or solicitor to witness, I thought the doc would be the cheaper option ..... NOT ... well over £100
Sorry, but had a chuckle at the tree. You should have put the calendar back to August & gained a bit more time. Hope I've managed to put mum off getting in the lift, or I too could find a mashed up tree & a trip to buy a new one
[/QUOTE]
Well saga of the house !! Brother rang and seen estate agent and solicitor and told them to reduce price of house to cover the costs of repairs. £7,000 .
Brother says he is finding this so stressful lol !!!!
He wants to come over to where we live and wear my ******* shoes !!ha[/QUOTE]
So long as that's a fair reduction, with quotes to show & you leave the, for buyers to see, it might work
Lol, sort of told my invisible the same thing
Sam
Hmmm
Monday - hospital
Tuesday - supermarket
Wednesday - another supermarket as today's had run out of milk????
I detest shopping
Hmmm
Monday - hospital
Tuesday - supermarket
Wednesday - another supermarket as today's had run out of milk????
I detest shopping
OMG THATS ME !!!
Mon. Hospital
Tues.supermarket
Weds. Supermarket
Thursday. Put the second tree together !!!!
Fri. Got three year old grandson round to wreck house !!
In between work ha ha and see mum !!!
Had to laugh, I also am known to write on hand !!
Funny thing is I come to bed tired, then brain kicks in thinking of all the things going on and I can't sleep !!
Hate shopping too !!
Well saga of the house !! Brother rang and seen estate agent and solicitor and told them to reduce price of house to cover the costs of repairs. £7,000 .Mum is pretty much on the "I shouldn't be here" a lot these days. I've told her not to be silly, she needs to hang around for 20 or 30 years while I get back on my feet
I do hate it when she talks of dying & she should be dead. What can I say? I've taken to giving her a hug and telling her it's going to be ok. Both know it's not going to be ok. She knows better than me
Trust me, my memory is sooooo useless, I'm a list person, so I always have a notebook. Sometimes I have a list on my hand, so I can't forget to take the list
I did the LPA on line, it's not so bad. I put carp in the bits I needed to look up, with a note of the section so I could go back and change. It meant I could do the whole form & then look for info
Do put a second attorney, even if it is an invisible. If you get hit by the damn bus & your mum has no capacity, there is no way of doing the LPA again. It is belt n braces! Also, if your mum will agree, get a non charging person to witness, or get a quote for their signature. Mum refused to allow anyone other than doc or solicitor to witness, I thought the doc would be the cheaper option ..... NOT ... well over £100
Sorry, but had a chuckle at the tree. You should have put the calendar back to August & gained a bit more time. Hope I've managed to put mum off getting in the lift, or I too could find a mashed up tree & a trip to buy a new one
Brother says he is finding this so stressful lol !!!!
He wants to come over to where we live and wear my ******* shoes !!ha[/QUOTE]
So long as that's a fair reduction, with quotes to show & you leave the, for buyers to see, it might work
Lol, sort of told my invisible the same thing
Sam[/QUOTE]
Yes knowledge and knowing what's coming is so scary for our mums, when they have both had to deal with this in their working lives.
I also think one day this will be me. Genetic wise. Dad vascular dementia, mum mixed Alzheimer's and vascular dementia. Sobering thought, and very scary.
Off to bed with book, sleep well
Sam[/QUOTE]
Yes knowledge and knowing what's coming is so scary for our mums, when they have both had to deal with this in their working lives.
I also think one day this will be me. Genetic wise. Dad vascular dementia, mum mixed Alzheimer's and vascular dementia. Sobering thought, and very scary.
Off to bed with book, sleep well[/QUOTE]
No chance, I'm killing my liver first mind you, with the amount of C in the family, both sides, it might get me first, which has to be better than this horrid living death
After reading 433 pages of So Bizzare, (saw you commented, so you have read some too), I now know I had no idea of what I was letting myself in for in moving down. I don't regret it, I just hope I can do a fraction of what AnnM has done for her MIL, but I am doubtful of my ability
There are some very caring people on this site, some who are fighting family as well as the disease, while doing so much for so little. It's not just the financial loss, it's the isolation, the daily grind & wondering if it is enough
I told my brother last week about a stat I'd seen, percentage of Carers who die before their Caree & told him to keep me in good health, or he would be getting mum. I needed a giggle, and his shocked expression gave me one
List on my hand .... mum moaned about it one day .... told her I can't leave my hand behind
I might try a book, but as it's Jodie P Lone Wolf and I'm at the bit where they are talking about turning off life support .... it might not be a good choice
Sleep well
Sam
Yes knowledge and knowing what's coming is so scary for our mums, when they have both had to deal with this in their working lives.
I also think one day this will be me. Genetic wise. Dad vascular dementia, mum mixed Alzheimer's and vascular dementia. Sobering thought, and very scary.
Off to bed with book, sleep well[/QUOTE]
No chance, I'm killing my liver first
mind you, with the amount of C in the family, both sides, it might get me first, which has to be better than this horrid living deathAfter reading 433 pages of So Bizzare, (saw you commented, so you have read some too), I now know I had no idea of what I was letting myself in for in moving down. I don't regret it, I just hope I can do a fraction of what AnnM has done for her MIL, but I am doubtful of my ability
There are some very caring people on this site, some who are fighting family as well as the disease, while doing so much for so little. It's not just the financial loss, it's the isolation, the daily grind & wondering if it is enough
I told my brother last week about a stat I'd seen, percentage of Carers who die before their Caree & told him to keep me in good health, or he would be getting mum
. I needed a giggle, and his shocked expression gave me one List on my hand .... mum moaned about it one day .... told her I can't leave my hand behind
I might try a book, but as it's Jodie P Lone Wolf and I'm at the bit where they are talking about turning off life support .... it might not be a good choice
Sleep well
Sam
Yes knowledge and knowing what's coming is so scary for our mums, when they have both had to deal with this in their working lives.
I also think one day this will be me. Genetic wise. Dad vascular dementia, mum mixed Alzheimer's and vascular dementia. Sobering thought, and very scary.
Off to bed with book, sleep well[/QUOTE]
No chance, I'm killing my liver first
mind you, with the amount of C in the family, both sides, it might get me first, which has to be better than this horrid living deathAfter reading 433 pages of So Bizzare, (saw you commented, so you have read some too), I now know I had no idea of what I was letting myself in for in moving down. I don't regret it, I just hope I can do a fraction of what AnnM has done for her MIL, but I am doubtful of my ability
There are some very caring people on this site, some who are fighting family as well as the disease, while doing so much for so little. It's not just the financial loss, it's the isolation, the daily grind & wondering if it is enough
I told my brother last week about a stat I'd seen, percentage of Carers who die before their Caree & told him to keep me in good health, or he would be getting mum
. I needed a giggle, and his shocked expression gave me one List on my hand .... mum moaned about it one day .... told her I can't leave my hand behind
I might try a book, but as it's Jodie P Lone Wolf and I'm at the bit where they are talking about turning off life support .... it might not be a good choice
Sleep well
Sam[/QUOTE]
Morning Sam
If I was given a choice of preference to death it would be as my FIL went, massive heart attack, sat on couch watching tv, done deal and finished. Sad for rest of family, but better than struggling in pain, gasping for breath or mind deteriorating day by day.
Even my husband says now he is so glad his dad went this way than as my dad went.
Yes, I have read quite a lot of different posts on here and think so many people have some terrible struggles. AnnM for one, I think she deserves a medal, it's a cruel disease.
Noticed your thread has got nearly 5,000 views !! So either people are reading out of interest or perhaps to have a smile at the antics of our lives lol
I too have just finished a book called Me before You. Very good, but cried !!
I am now on with latest Martina Cole, a bit of violence,sex and gangsters, best way to go to sleep ha ha I read approximately two chapters each night than am asleep, if not thinking of next day and mum !!
Another book to read. Little girl behind the radiator. True story and a lot reminds me of both mum and dad. The mans mum had Alzheimer's.
Well me typing on here won't get that blinking second tree for mum, so am off to get it.
Ps would love to have been a fly on wall to see your brothers face
[/QUOTE]
Morning Sam
If I was given a choice of preference to death it would be as my FIL went, massive heart attack, sat on couch watching tv, done deal and finished. Sad for rest of family, but better than struggling in pain, gasping for breath or mind deteriorating day by day.
Even my husband says now he is so glad his dad went this way than as my dad went.
Yes, I have read quite a lot of different posts on here and think so many people have some terrible struggles. AnnM for one, I think she deserves a medal, it's a cruel disease.
Noticed your thread has got nearly 5,000 views !! So either people are reading out of interest or perhaps to have a smile at the antics of our lives lol
I too have just finished a book called Me before You. Very good, but cried !!
I am now on with latest Martina Cole, a bit of violence,sex and gangsters, best way to go to sleep ha ha I read approximately two chapters each night than am asleep, if not thinking of next day and mum !!
Another book to read. Little girl behind the radiator. True story and a lot reminds me of both mum and dad. The mans mum had Alzheimer's.
Well me typing on here won't get that blinking second tree for mum, so am off to get it.
Ps would love to have been a fly on wall to see your brothers face [/QUOTE]
Morning
I will have to make a list of suggested reading, but can you let me have the author, so I can scan the charity shop shelves. I have a varied taste in books, prob have over 500 now (mum is a reader, so understands, but neighbours & friends keep telling me to dump them!!)
Ooooh, 5,000 views, better watch what I say, don't want to offend anyone. On the other hand, if it helps one person, that's something . Although mum is at such an early stage, I almost feel an imposter. Sure she has her temper tantrums, awful rude about the size of people's butts, but no sundowning, she still knows who we all are.
I do see changes, although going through it slowly, I can adapt as we go. At least I think / hope I can
I've got a chat about my high cholesterol this afternoon, going to be a rush from work to make it. I looked at the list of "bad" foods & good ones. Should be an interesting chat. Bad - dairy, good certain yoghurt. I'm lactose intolerant Can't eat any of them, so probably genetic should be interesting to see what she comes up with
Oooops, going to be late, catch up later
Sam
Morning Sam
If I was given a choice of preference to death it would be as my FIL went, massive heart attack, sat on couch watching tv, done deal and finished. Sad for rest of family, but better than struggling in pain, gasping for breath or mind deteriorating day by day.
Even my husband says now he is so glad his dad went this way than as my dad went.
Yes, I have read quite a lot of different posts on here and think so many people have some terrible struggles. AnnM for one, I think she deserves a medal, it's a cruel disease.
Noticed your thread has got nearly 5,000 views !! So either people are reading out of interest or perhaps to have a smile at the antics of our lives lol
I too have just finished a book called Me before You. Very good, but cried !!
I am now on with latest Martina Cole, a bit of violence,sex and gangsters, best way to go to sleep ha ha I read approximately two chapters each night than am asleep, if not thinking of next day and mum !!
Another book to read. Little girl behind the radiator. True story and a lot reminds me of both mum and dad. The mans mum had Alzheimer's.
Well me typing on here won't get that blinking second tree for mum, so am off to get it.
Ps would love to have been a fly on wall to see your brothers face [/QUOTE]
Morning
I will have to make a list of suggested reading, but can you let me have the author, so I can scan the charity shop shelves. I have a varied taste in books, prob have over 500 now (mum is a reader, so understands, but neighbours & friends keep telling me to dump them!!)
Ooooh, 5,000 views, better watch what I say, don't want to offend anyone
. On the other hand, if it helps one person, that's something . Although mum is at such an early stage, I almost feel an imposter. Sure she has her temper tantrums, awful rude about the size of people's butts, but no sundowning, she still knows who we all are. I do see changes, although going through it slowly, I can adapt as we go. At least I think / hope I can
I've got a chat about my high cholesterol this afternoon, going to be a rush from work to make it. I looked at the list of "bad" foods & good ones. Should be an interesting chat. Bad - dairy, good certain yoghurt. I'm lactose intolerant
Can't eat any of them, so probably genetic should be interesting to see what she comes up with Oooops, going to be late, catch up later
Sam
Morning Sam
If I was given a choice of preference to death it would be as my FIL went, massive heart attack, sat on couch watching tv, done deal and finished. Sad for rest of family, but better than struggling in pain, gasping for breath or mind deteriorating day by day.
Even my husband says now he is so glad his dad went this way than as my dad went.
Yes, I have read quite a lot of different posts on here and think so many people have some terrible struggles. AnnM for one, I think she deserves a medal, it's a cruel disease.
Noticed your thread has got nearly 5,000 views !! So either people are reading out of interest or perhaps to have a smile at the antics of our lives lol
I too have just finished a book called Me before You. Very good, but cried !!
I am now on with latest Martina Cole, a bit of violence,sex and gangsters, best way to go to sleep ha ha I read approximately two chapters each night than am asleep, if not thinking of next day and mum !!
Another book to read. Little girl behind the radiator. True story and a lot reminds me of both mum and dad. The mans mum had Alzheimer's.
Well me typing on here won't get that blinking second tree for mum, so am off to get it.
Ps would love to have been a fly on wall to see your brothers face [/QUOTE]
Morning
I will have to make a list of suggested reading, but can you let me have the author, so I can scan the charity shop shelves. I have a varied taste in books, prob have over 500 now (mum is a reader, so understands, but neighbours & friends keep telling me to dump them!!)
Ooooh, 5,000 views, better watch what I say, don't want to offend anyone
. On the other hand, if it helps one person, that's something . Although mum is at such an early stage, I almost feel an imposter. Sure she has her temper tantrums, awful rude about the size of people's butts, but no sundowning, she still knows who we all are. I do see changes, although going through it slowly, I can adapt as we go. At least I think / hope I can
I've got a chat about my high cholesterol this afternoon, going to be a rush from work to make it. I looked at the list of "bad" foods & good ones. Should be an interesting chat. Bad - dairy, good certain yoghurt. I'm lactose intolerant
Can't eat any of them, so probably genetic should be interesting to see what she comes up with Oooops, going to be late, catch up later
Sam[/QUOTE]
Hi Sam
Little girl in the radiator: Martin Slevin
Me before you: jojo moyes
Betrayal: martina cole
I have bags and bags of books in my loft !! One day my children will be cursing me when they maybe have to clear the loft lol !!
My daughter (27) and sister have been with mum today, so was able to get tree,lights and a lovely plack for her door ( Christmas one )
Am not going today, my daughter says she's fine, she took her fish and chips for lunch and had a good chat with mum.
One day we both know it will be our mums at end stage of disease, but for the moment at least we can enjoy the time we have before that day comes.
Mum has good days and bad days, sometimes just awful !! I could cry !!
Then the next day she is more like my normal mum, seems to have lulls of good and bad.
Whatever I like to eat in life is apparently bad for me !! I am not going to sit and eat salad ( mum loves it) and pretend it's great, I do try some moderation in portions. But then have a blow out on a weekend
Anyhow decorating is coming on a dream !! Not been touched for years and badly needed a makeover !! Only thing is you buy new rug, cushions,curtains,pictures and then think this rooms lovely I need to do rest of house because rest of rooms look rubbish now lol.
Off to walk dogs
[/QUOTE]Hi Sam
Little girl in the radiator: Martin Slevin
Me before you: jojo moyes
Betrayal: martina cole
I have bags and bags of books in my loft !! One day my children will be cursing me when they maybe have to clear the loft lol !!
My daughter (27) and sister have been with mum today, so was able to get tree,lights and a lovely plack for her door ( Christmas one )
Am not going today, my daughter says she's fine, she took her fish and chips for lunch and had a good chat with mum.
One day we both know it will be our mums at end stage of disease, but for the moment at least we can enjoy the time we have before that day comes.
Mum has good days and bad days, sometimes just awful !! I could cry !!
Then the next day she is more like my normal mum, seems to have lulls of good and bad.
Whatever I like to eat in life is apparently bad for me !! I am not going to sit and eat salad ( mum loves it) and pretend it's great, I do try some moderation in portions. But then have a blow out on a weekend
Anyhow decorating is coming on a dream !! Not been touched for years and badly needed a makeover !! Only thing is you buy new rug, cushions,curtains,pictures and then think this rooms lovely I need to do rest of house because rest of rooms look rubbish now lol.
Off to walk dogs[/QUOTE]
Evening Margi
Well the traffic was so bad, I had to skip shops on the way back from work, I'm now left with the fuel light on & have decided to leave it till the morning. Theory being, it'll be less freaky running out of petrol in daylight. I prefer to keep it topped up, but it's been one of those weeks
I've put these books on the phone so I can look out for them, Martina Cole is one I generally pick up if I see it, but not heard of the other two. I've been feasting on Peter James recently & now I've managed to pick up the missing 2nd & 4th books of his "Dead ..." series, I'm going to start those! IF I can get a bit of P&Q
Mum is a great reader, although I do wonder if she is really understanding the books ATM, but she is "reading" a lot. However, as soon as I open a book, she starts talking to me about random stuff. Even though she was reading when I opened the book??? So, while I used to read 3 or 4 books a week ... I'm still reading one I started a month ago
Lol. I've put up 2 book shelves in mum's room, with a 3rd planned, as not enough room for the books she has & she says she doesn't have many. The shelves are 8' long & they are the books I have no interest in
There are 4 more long shelves on the landing, with 3 short ones above those, I have 3 bookcases & 4 short shelves in my room & a further bookcase in an alcove by the front door. Finishing up with 2 shelves and a tiny box bookcase in the conservatory. You could say, we have a few books
I have always lent books to friends, I re read some, others are series and a few are autobiographies. Some charity will benefit when I either clear out or clear off
Mum drives me nuts at times. She will do the same thing over & over again, no matter what I say & either get frustrated or hurt herself
She has a gardener. She is also very particular about how things are done. She has NO patience & if you don't do it now, she does it herself. Doesn't matter that she mentions something at midnight, I go to work in the morning, so when I'm supposed to do this random thing I've no idea.
I've come in tonight, everything is fine, she says. Several hours later she starts pulling out dressings, (bag of which have been left in the middle of the breakfast room), lots of huffing & sighs. Turns out she decided to trim (hack to pieces more like) some of the shrubs in the back garden. Despite catching herself on one particular tree/ shrub several times before & me suggesting she goes the other way round to avoid it, she paid no attention & has yet again, given herself a nasty cut on this tree/shrub
I do try to anticipate what she might want to attack next, but as its getting dark by the time I get in, that limits my outdoor activity to the weekend. Monday is filled by grandchild / son & Friday is shopping with mum & appointments. But she will not wait
I expect one of the neighbours will be on my back in a day or two about how my poor mum has hurt herself because I didn't get around to helping her walk my shoes try in to ... please rearrange.
Oh well. What unhealthy, artery clogging meal shall I conjure up today
At least mum is enjoying my home cooking & putting back some of the weight she lost last year
Sorry for the loooonnnngggggg post
Sam
Little girl in the radiator: Martin Slevin
Me before you: jojo moyes
Betrayal: martina cole
I have bags and bags of books in my loft !! One day my children will be cursing me when they maybe have to clear the loft lol !!
My daughter (27) and sister have been with mum today, so was able to get tree,lights and a lovely plack for her door ( Christmas one )
Am not going today, my daughter says she's fine, she took her fish and chips for lunch and had a good chat with mum.
One day we both know it will be our mums at end stage of disease, but for the moment at least we can enjoy the time we have before that day comes.
Mum has good days and bad days, sometimes just awful !! I could cry !!
Then the next day she is more like my normal mum, seems to have lulls of good and bad.
Whatever I like to eat in life is apparently bad for me !! I am not going to sit and eat salad ( mum loves it) and pretend it's great, I do try some moderation in portions. But then have a blow out on a weekend
Anyhow decorating is coming on a dream !! Not been touched for years and badly needed a makeover !! Only thing is you buy new rug, cushions,curtains,pictures and then think this rooms lovely I need to do rest of house because rest of rooms look rubbish now lol.
Off to walk dogs[/QUOTE]
Evening Margi
Well the traffic was so bad, I had to skip shops on the way back from work, I'm now left with the fuel light on & have decided to leave it till the morning. Theory being, it'll be less freaky running out of petrol in daylight
. I prefer to keep it topped up, but it's been one of those weeks I've put these books on the phone so I can look out for them, Martina Cole is one I generally pick up if I see it, but not heard of the other two. I've been feasting on Peter James recently & now I've managed to pick up the missing 2nd & 4th books of his "Dead ..." series, I'm going to start those! IF I can get a bit of P&Q
Mum is a great reader, although I do wonder if she is really understanding the books ATM, but she is "reading" a lot. However, as soon as I open a book, she starts talking to me about random stuff. Even though she was reading when I opened the book??? So, while I used to read 3 or 4 books a week ... I'm still reading one I started a month ago
Lol. I've put up 2 book shelves in mum's room, with a 3rd planned, as not enough room for the books she has & she says she doesn't have many. The shelves are 8' long
& they are the books I have no interest inThere are 4 more long shelves on the landing, with 3 short ones above those, I have 3 bookcases & 4 short shelves in my room & a further bookcase in an alcove by the front door. Finishing up with 2 shelves and a tiny box bookcase in the conservatory
. You could say, we have a few books I have always lent books to friends, I re read some, others are series and a few are autobiographies. Some charity will benefit when I either clear out or clear off
Mum drives me nuts at times. She will do the same thing over & over again, no matter what I say & either get frustrated or hurt herself
She has a gardener. She is also very particular about how things are done. She has NO patience & if you don't do it now, she does it herself. Doesn't matter that she mentions something at midnight, I go to work in the morning, so when I'm supposed to do this random thing I've no idea.
I've come in tonight, everything is fine, she says. Several hours later she starts pulling out dressings, (bag of which have been left in the middle of the breakfast room), lots of huffing & sighs. Turns out she decided to trim (hack to pieces more like) some of the shrubs in the back garden. Despite catching herself on one particular tree/ shrub several times before & me suggesting she goes the other way round to avoid it, she paid no attention & has yet again, given herself a nasty cut on this tree/shrub
I do try to anticipate what she might want to attack next, but as its getting dark by the time I get in, that limits my outdoor activity to the weekend. Monday is filled by grandchild / son & Friday is shopping with mum & appointments. But she will not wait
I expect one of the neighbours will be on my back in a day or two about how my poor mum has hurt herself because I didn't get around to helping her
walk my shoes try in to ... please rearrange. Oh well. What unhealthy, artery clogging meal shall I conjure up today
At least mum is enjoying my home cooking & putting back some of the weight she lost last year
Sorry for the loooonnnngggggg post
Sam
Hi Sam
Little girl in the radiator: Martin Slevin
Me before you: jojo moyes
Betrayal: martina cole
I have bags and bags of books in my loft !! One day my children will be cursing me when they maybe have to clear the loft lol !!
My daughter (27) and sister have been with mum today, so was able to get tree,lights and a lovely plack for her door ( Christmas one )
Am not going today, my daughter says she's fine, she took her fish and chips for lunch and had a good chat with mum.
One day we both know it will be our mums at end stage of disease, but for the moment at least we can enjoy the time we have before that day comes.
Mum has good days and bad days, sometimes just awful !! I could cry !!
Then the next day she is more like my normal mum, seems to have lulls of good and bad.
Whatever I like to eat in life is apparently bad for me !! I am not going to sit and eat salad ( mum loves it) and pretend it's great, I do try some moderation in portions. But then have a blow out on a weekend
Anyhow decorating is coming on a dream !! Not been touched for years and badly needed a makeover !! Only thing is you buy new rug, cushions,curtains,pictures and then think this rooms lovely I need to do rest of house because rest of rooms look rubbish now lol.
Off to walk dogs[/QUOTE]
Evening Margi
Well the traffic was so bad, I had to skip shops on the way back from work, I'm now left with the fuel light on & have decided to leave it till the morning. Theory being, it'll be less freaky running out of petrol in daylight. I prefer to keep it topped up, but it's been one of those weeks
I've put these books on the phone so I can look out for them, Martina Cole is one I generally pick up if I see it, but not heard of the other two. I've been feasting on Peter James recently & now I've managed to pick up the missing 2nd & 4th books of his "Dead ..." series, I'm going to start those! IF I can get a bit of P&Q
Mum is a great reader, although I do wonder if she is really understanding the books ATM, but she is "reading" a lot. However, as soon as I open a book, she starts talking to me about random stuff. Even though she was reading when I opened the book??? So, while I used to read 3 or 4 books a week ... I'm still reading one I started a month ago
Lol. I've put up 2 book shelves in mum's room, with a 3rd planned, as not enough room for the books she has & she says she doesn't have many. The shelves are 8' long & they are the books I have no interest in
There are 4 more long shelves on the landing, with 3 short ones above those, I have 3 bookcases & 4 short shelves in my room & a further bookcase in an alcove by the front door. Finishing up with 2 shelves and a tiny box bookcase in the conservatory. You could say, we have a few books
I have always lent books to friends, I re read some, others are series and a few are autobiographies. Some charity will benefit when I either clear out or clear off
Mum drives me nuts at times. She will do the same thing over & over again, no matter what I say & either get frustrated or hurt herself
She has a gardener. She is also very particular about how things are done. She has NO patience & if you don't do it now, she does it herself. Doesn't matter that she mentions something at midnight, I go to work in the morning, so when I'm supposed to do this random thing I've no idea.
I've come in tonight, everything is fine, she says. Several hours later she starts pulling out dressings, (bag of which have been left in the middle of the breakfast room), lots of huffing & sighs. Turns out she decided to trim (hack to pieces more like) some of the shrubs in the back garden. Despite catching herself on one particular tree/ shrub several times before & me suggesting she goes the other way round to avoid it, she paid no attention & has yet again, given herself a nasty cut on this tree/shrub
I do try to anticipate what she might want to attack next, but as its getting dark by the time I get in, that limits my outdoor activity to the weekend. Monday is filled by grandchild / son & Friday is shopping with mum & appointments. But she will not wait
I expect one of the neighbours will be on my back in a day or two about how my poor mum has hurt herself because I didn't get around to helping her walk my shoes try in to ... please rearrange.
Oh well. What unhealthy, artery clogging meal shall I conjure up today
At least mum is enjoying my home cooking & putting back some of the weight she lost last year
Sorry for the loooonnnngggggg post
Sam[/QUOTE]
Evening Sam
Mum used to love to read. Never love stories she says she prefers a good murder or thriller
But now I don't even think she really follows any story, a paper is delivered every morning to try to keep her updated on news and what the day is
She still asks what day it is ??
Even watching tv, that she loves, she hardly follows story line and when I have watched it with her she gives a totally different ' insight ' into what we have just watched.
Sad really.
I can not ever read infront of mum, she chats and I have to put book down or I too forget what I just read !!
Friends and myself swap books, I generally take 4 on holiday with me at least
I read autobiographys, murders, thrillers etc...
Blinking drive you mad !!! Re: gardening !!!
Mum also has no patience, pops up with something that she wants/needs doing and as much as I do or get as quickly as possible, then mum fixates on something else !!
My sister says there's always going to be something else in her mind and no matter how much I try, I won't win
Mum climbs on chairs to take curtains down !! Repeatedly told don't I will do it !!
Mum also when she had house would " attack bushes " !!
Thank goodness no garden now.
She has been climbing again today !!! Getting Xmas decorations down off shelf !!!
Have said twice today on phone that I have got her a tree and lights, but am sure another phone call will come before bed !!!
Onwards and upwards ha ha
Little girl in the radiator: Martin Slevin
Me before you: jojo moyes
Betrayal: martina cole
I have bags and bags of books in my loft !! One day my children will be cursing me when they maybe have to clear the loft lol !!
My daughter (27) and sister have been with mum today, so was able to get tree,lights and a lovely plack for her door ( Christmas one )
Am not going today, my daughter says she's fine, she took her fish and chips for lunch and had a good chat with mum.
One day we both know it will be our mums at end stage of disease, but for the moment at least we can enjoy the time we have before that day comes.
Mum has good days and bad days, sometimes just awful !! I could cry !!
Then the next day she is more like my normal mum, seems to have lulls of good and bad.
Whatever I like to eat in life is apparently bad for me !! I am not going to sit and eat salad ( mum loves it) and pretend it's great, I do try some moderation in portions. But then have a blow out on a weekend
Anyhow decorating is coming on a dream !! Not been touched for years and badly needed a makeover !! Only thing is you buy new rug, cushions,curtains,pictures and then think this rooms lovely I need to do rest of house because rest of rooms look rubbish now lol.
Off to walk dogs[/QUOTE]
Evening Margi
Well the traffic was so bad, I had to skip shops on the way back from work, I'm now left with the fuel light on & have decided to leave it till the morning. Theory being, it'll be less freaky running out of petrol in daylight
. I prefer to keep it topped up, but it's been one of those weeks I've put these books on the phone so I can look out for them, Martina Cole is one I generally pick up if I see it, but not heard of the other two. I've been feasting on Peter James recently & now I've managed to pick up the missing 2nd & 4th books of his "Dead ..." series, I'm going to start those! IF I can get a bit of P&Q
Mum is a great reader, although I do wonder if she is really understanding the books ATM, but she is "reading" a lot. However, as soon as I open a book, she starts talking to me about random stuff. Even though she was reading when I opened the book??? So, while I used to read 3 or 4 books a week ... I'm still reading one I started a month ago
Lol. I've put up 2 book shelves in mum's room, with a 3rd planned, as not enough room for the books she has & she says she doesn't have many. The shelves are 8' long
& they are the books I have no interest inThere are 4 more long shelves on the landing, with 3 short ones above those, I have 3 bookcases & 4 short shelves in my room & a further bookcase in an alcove by the front door. Finishing up with 2 shelves and a tiny box bookcase in the conservatory
. You could say, we have a few books I have always lent books to friends, I re read some, others are series and a few are autobiographies. Some charity will benefit when I either clear out or clear off
Mum drives me nuts at times. She will do the same thing over & over again, no matter what I say & either get frustrated or hurt herself
She has a gardener. She is also very particular about how things are done. She has NO patience & if you don't do it now, she does it herself. Doesn't matter that she mentions something at midnight, I go to work in the morning, so when I'm supposed to do this random thing I've no idea.
I've come in tonight, everything is fine, she says. Several hours later she starts pulling out dressings, (bag of which have been left in the middle of the breakfast room), lots of huffing & sighs. Turns out she decided to trim (hack to pieces more like) some of the shrubs in the back garden. Despite catching herself on one particular tree/ shrub several times before & me suggesting she goes the other way round to avoid it, she paid no attention & has yet again, given herself a nasty cut on this tree/shrub
I do try to anticipate what she might want to attack next, but as its getting dark by the time I get in, that limits my outdoor activity to the weekend. Monday is filled by grandchild / son & Friday is shopping with mum & appointments. But she will not wait
I expect one of the neighbours will be on my back in a day or two about how my poor mum has hurt herself because I didn't get around to helping her
walk my shoes try in to ... please rearrange. Oh well. What unhealthy, artery clogging meal shall I conjure up today
At least mum is enjoying my home cooking & putting back some of the weight she lost last year
Sorry for the loooonnnngggggg post
Sam[/QUOTE]
Evening Sam
Mum used to love to read. Never love stories she says she prefers a good murder or thriller
But now I don't even think she really follows any story, a paper is delivered every morning to try to keep her updated on news and what the day is
She still asks what day it is ??
Even watching tv, that she loves, she hardly follows story line and when I have watched it with her she gives a totally different ' insight ' into what we have just watched.
Sad really.
I can not ever read infront of mum, she chats and I have to put book down or I too forget what I just read !!
Friends and myself swap books, I generally take 4 on holiday with me at least
I read autobiographys, murders, thrillers etc...
Blinking drive you mad !!! Re: gardening !!!
Mum also has no patience, pops up with something that she wants/needs doing and as much as I do or get as quickly as possible, then mum fixates on something else !!
My sister says there's always going to be something else in her mind and no matter how much I try, I won't win
Mum climbs on chairs to take curtains down !! Repeatedly told don't I will do it !!
Mum also when she had house would " attack bushes " !!
Thank goodness no garden now.
She has been climbing again today !!! Getting Xmas decorations down off shelf !!!
Have said twice today on phone that I have got her a tree and lights, but am sure another phone call will come before bed !!!
Onwards and upwards ha ha
Hi Margi
Just a normal evening in a Strange new world
Mum is the same "give me a juicy murder", books or films, but not too much story about the people or she says its "a load of rubbish"
. She also falls asleep if the film isn't gripping enough, then wakes up & asks if I can follow it as it a "load of old rubbish" I managed about 12 books on my 2 weeks holiday with mum, but considerably more when went with a friend
The hotel had a bookcase by the pool & people put their read ones there & I swopped out quite a few, so although I'd taken 8, I read lots of different authors as a result of the leavings . Have you tried Karen Rose? Find by the pool, she's quite good Although will admit it drives me a bit loopy, mum asks what day is it & whats the date all the time. Sometimes telling me yesterday was Tuesday, so .... what day is it???? This is with the calendar in front of her, reading off the day and date, crossing off (?????) the days & still she asks
and before anyone says its cuz she can't remember the order of the days, she can. It's like she is used to asking & it's almost a loop, IYKWIM. I guess we all have our stumbling blocks & that is one of mine
I really do try to take a breath and not show my frustration but it's sooooooo hard for me I'm actually living here, so it's not like she has to wait a few days for me to visit, a few hours if I've gone shopping alone to save her having to jostle round a supermarket, she's always been the same, but is a hundred times worse. I try & explain it, but if she gets it in her head, that's it, she climbs into the loft, pulls out ladders etc & she is so unsafe
. Ladder not propped correctly, leans over sharp bushes, then tells me to leave her alone if I catch her at it. Can't win sometimesRight. That's my moan for tonight
Going to see what's on the idiot box, or chewing gum for eyes as a friend calls the TV
See if I can persuade her to settle and watch some mindless violence & I can relax for a bit
Have a good one
Sam
Hi Margi
Sorry, forgot to ask before hitting submit
How's your mum re the hosp? Any idea on a date?
Meant to ask, had a moan, thought I'd better wrap it up & then realised I'd not asked the one thing I'd meant to. Blame it on the D, I swear it's catching
Sam
Sorry, forgot to ask before hitting submit
How's your mum re the hosp? Any idea on a date?
Meant to ask, had a moan, thought I'd better wrap it up & then realised I'd not asked the one thing I'd meant to
. Blame it on the D, I swear it's catching Sam
Mum has her moments ....
Shall we go in the stairs
?????
Do you want us to go upstairs, sit on the stairs or .... as I'm not sure we can get in the stairs
Mum: FOTFL. (She was laughing as I was asking the first two, so pushed on the third and started "singing" The Stair Where I Sit
She then told her I was getting her confiscated
At least she has been laughing about her word mix ups today, no stress, bless her
I'm hanging onto these memories
Sa
Shall we go in the stairs
?????
Do you want us to go upstairs, sit on the stairs or .... as I'm not sure we can get in the stairs
Mum: FOTFL. (She was laughing as I was asking the first two, so pushed on the third and started "singing" The Stair Where I Sit
She then told her I was getting her confiscated
At least she has been laughing about her word mix ups today, no stress, bless her
I'm hanging onto these memories
Sa
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