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Can I ... Should I?


Volunteer Host
Nov 6, 2008
Even when it is expected it still takes your breath away, remember that no one could have done more than you and your brother I hope in time that will bring comfort to you both


Registered User
Jan 15, 2018
So sorry to hear of your mum’s passing, she is out of pain and at peace now. You can look in the mirror and feel proud. Wishing you, your brother and your family strength for the coming days.

Sam Luvit

Registered User
Oct 19, 2016
East Sussex
Thank you @Winky1973

I know I tried my best, Mum drove me insane at times, had me sobbing at others, but we also had a brilliant holiday abroad, a break in Blackpool (which she talked about more than anything), visited friends & I got her back in phone contact with others

No place here for the GM, I only ever asked my kids to do their best, I did my best. I wasn’t always right ... but I tried.

Sam Luvit

Registered User
Oct 19, 2016
East Sussex
Thank you @try again

Yes, she looked more peaceful than I’ve seen her for a month. I’d said my goodbyes to my mum a long time ago, now I can say hello to her memory, particularly those few years where we were friends

I will take some time to work out where I want to be, what I want to do & just do it. I will go visit friends I’ve not seen in years, have passport will travel :D

I think brother & I have become closer through this last 3 weeks. I hope he does ditch the bleep & go visit old friends & spend some time for himself.


Registered User
Aug 25, 2015
South coast of England
Sam, I think I suspected this when you hadn't been in to say 'Hi'. I know you were expecting it, but that doesn't make it any easier!

You have certainly earned the right to look at yourself in the mirror without any recriminations. You did faaar more than you ever thought you would be able to manage and allowed your mum to end her days in her own home.

I know this will be a time of mixed emotions - grief that the lady you were getting to love has gone but relief that this ordeal is over (for your sake and hers). You might also find yourself experiencing emotions you weren't expecting, and that is fine too.

Sending you more ((((((((hugs)))))))) than the page can hold.


Registered User
May 12, 2017
My condolences Sam you have been amazing. You have shown your mum the true meaning of love & met all the challenges with great courage. May your mum now RIP. I hope you & your brother will draw strength & comfort from the closeness that has developed between you as you work through the changes that lie ahead. Massive hugs to you both & to poor pooch as well who must be so lost at the moment. Take care Sam X


Registered User
Jul 3, 2017
Oh Sam, my dear. I wasn’t expecting it this quickly...you poor darling. But what a GOOD daughter you have been, fighting battles, hardly sleeping, loving, caring..you have done it all. Hold your head up through the tears and feel proud that you can truly say you did your best for your lovely mum.
Dive into that bag of hugs ...and rest.


Registered User
Jul 23, 2016
Sam I remember your visit to Blackpool with such fond memories where along with my Mum, Margi and her lovely Mum and yourself with your dear Mum we all met up and true friendships were born.
I can't believe what has happened so quickly but I know your Mums now at peace and has joined your Dad.
Sam you have been truly amazing in the way you have cared for your Mum. Right now it will as others have said feel surreal, I'm so pleased your brother is with you.
2jays candle is burning brightly for your Mum. May she rest in peace.
(((((Hugs and much love)))))))xxxx


Registered User
Nov 27, 2016
Many condolences - have been reading your thread for nearly 2 years now and have always been amazed how you have looked after your mum and coped with everything. Best wishes for the future.


Registered User
Sep 10, 2013
Lytham St Annes
Thinking of you and your family, as others have said very bitter sweet time, so relieved your Mum is at peace, and also that you too now can begin your life again, in the full knowledge that you did your absolute best for her.

Also feel so sad for poor Pooch, little love must be so bewildered at what has been happening, he was obviously very close to your Mum......bless his little heart x

Thinking of you all Sam, take care x

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