But oh those lonely nights .........

Discussion in 'After dementia — dealing with loss' started by Scarlett123, Aug 12, 2015.

  1. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    60,166
    Female
    Dundee
    Me too LadyA.

    Nice to read you update Scarlett. Your granddaughter must be such a help to you.
     
  2. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    Scarlett, such good news about your lip and mammogram all clear. I'm sorry there isn't better news of Gloria though. xxx
     
  3. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    70,171
    Kent
    Good news Scarlett. What a relief for you . :)
     
  4. cragmaid

    cragmaid Registered User

    Oct 18, 2010
    7,942
    North East England
    I have had all my mammograms....I do suffer though because of my crocked shoulder, putting and holding your arm Just There has brought tears to my eyes before:mad:.... but thankfully ( as yet) they have always been clear. Lovely to see your photograph Scarlett. You are looking good Lady.x.x.
     
  5. Loopiloo

    Loopiloo Registered User

    May 10, 2010
    6,118
    Female
    Scotland
    Good to catch up with you Scarlett - and your photo is lovely, you do look good! Also your young friend! :) :) Great news about your all clear concerning your lip and mammogram.

    But very sad about Gloria, and her partner. Heart breaking for you to see her so ill. One feels so helpless to do anything to help.

    The grandchildren grow up so quickly don't they, she does sound a good help to you and good company Good luck to her with driving!

    You are often in my thoughts. Keep in touch.... Enjoy the not too hot summer remaining, we could count on the fingers of one hand the truly summer days up here this year. The nights are getting darker too quickly now, disappointing.

    Love
    Loo xxx
     
  6. Casbow

    Casbow Registered User

    Sep 3, 2013
    1,002
    Colchester
    Hello Scarlett. I went looking for you as I realised that I hadn't seen a post from you in ages. Obviously I didn't look hard enough. So sorry to hear about your health worries and family sadness. I know how you feel about the evenings and nights. David is in a nursing home now and three and a half months later I feel I am kind of getting on with life. Nothing will ever be the same. I go to see him 4 days a week making sure that he never has more than one day without a visit from me. I always look forward to seeing him even though he doesn't know who I am. He is in a good place compared to how he was 2 months ago. Much calmer and to be honest away with the fairies. But there is nothing wrong with fairies.! I hate the evenings and cry at anything and everything. But i manage to go to sleep ok. I wake early and often have to force myself to stay in bed (awake) as there is no point in getting up too early. I feel your pain and don't know how I will manage when he is gone and I can no longer see him. I hope it will soon get easier for you and you get peace of mind and maybe be able to relax and sleep better. My love to you. xxxx
     
  7. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    Gloria now has a fantastic wig, which has brightened her spirits no end, and, praise be, she's gained a few pounds. As she lost nearly 5 stones, there's a long way to go, but small steps are the order of the day.

    I'm now saying "getting on for 3 years", when people ask me how long it's been since John died, and I recently managed what I consider a Big Step - for me. I went to the Crematorium, with my grand-daughter, on our way back from somewhere else, and, for the first time, I didn't cry when I was there.

    On Sunday, one of our choirs had an evening show to raise money for our local Hospice, and it was a huge success. We called it a "Black and Bling" night! We sang 37 songs from 27 different musicals, and I loved it. Here's a photo of me with some of my friends.
     
  8. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    Ty again!
     

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  9. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    More Bling!
     

    Attached Files:

  10. DianeW

    DianeW Registered User

    Sep 10, 2013
    555
    Lytham St Annes
    Lovely photos, very glamorous.
     
  11. jugglingmum

    jugglingmum Registered User

    Jan 5, 2014
    5,407
    Female
    Chester
    Lovely photos - you all look really happy
     
  12. sunray

    sunray Registered User

    Sep 21, 2008
    1,431
    Female
    East Coast of Australia
    So many older women are really beautiful,maybe ever more so than when they were young. Quite glamorous and sassy, you and your friends included.
     
  13. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    Thank you for your kind comments. We were all teenagers in the 60s, and still make the effort to look "groomed"! Our concerts are a win-win-win situation. We all enjoy singing, the audience enjoy our songs, especially as they can join in, and we raise money for the Hospice.

    Belonging to these 2 Community Choirs has done more to raise my spirits than anything else.
     
  14. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    Thrilled!!!!!!

    After a l-o-n-g battle, my darling friend Gloria has turned a corner. She has now gained nearly a stone, and though she still has a long path ahead, she feels things are improving, far more than we dared hope.

    The worst side effect of the chemo, is that the nerve endings in her feet have been affected, and she either cannot feel them, or they feel cold, and she has been warned that this may be permanent.

    She lives a good 10 minutes walk from the bus stop, and her area is serviced by one bus every hour or so, and her car was her lifeline, but she cannot drive, so this is a problem. But compared to the original prognosis, things are so very much better.

    Her PET scan results were good, and she has an appointment next week when she'll find out how the situation regarding the "second cousin of TB", which she developed at about the same time as lymphoma.

    You've all been so supportive that I thought you'd like an update.
     
  15. Saffie

    Saffie Registered User

    Mar 26, 2011
    22,504
    Female
    Near Southampton
    Good news on a number of fronts. You must be so relieved about Gloria. I hope she finds a way to manage the inability to drive. Maybe she might be able to move somewhere more accessible to amenities.
    Life does have a habit of throwing these hurdles doesn't it.x
     
  16. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    70,171
    Kent
    Good news Scarlett
     
  17. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    13,552
    Ireland
    Lovely to hear from you Scarlett, especially with some good news about Gloria.

    And how is Scarlett doing?
     
  18. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    60,166
    Female
    Dundee
  19. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    Well like most of us, I have "up" days, and some days when I can easily nail a smile on my face, and can convince others that I'm fine, though I'm not, other days when things aren't so good, and really down days - but I can cope. :)

    And that's what it's about - finding coping mechanisms. If the tears start, for no explicable reason, I do something, like some gardening, phoning a friend, giving Billy a cuddle (I don't know what I'd do without him), and if none of those work, I take myself to a Garden Centre and rashly buy a plant or 2. :D

    Today's a lovely day. Grand-daughter came for 6 hours, son is Skypeing me later, then a bath, followed by Strictly - and a bar of chocolate. :D:D:D
     
  20. truth24

    truth24 Registered User

    Oct 13, 2013
    5,725
    North Somerset
    Haven't been on TP much lately, Scarlett but have often wondered how you are.
    So pleased to hear that your lip has healed, that your mammogram was clear
    and VERY relieved to hear about Gloria. Glad your granddaughter is still supporting you and well done for your fund raising concerts. Long may you continue.
     

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