But oh those lonely nights .........

Discussion in 'After dementia — dealing with loss' started by Scarlett123, Aug 12, 2015.

  1. disi

    disi Registered User

    A very happy birthday Scarlett, so sorry to read about Gloria. xx
     
  2. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    A belated Happy Birthday from me too, Scarlett. I'm so pleased your 'special' birthday was celebrated in style. I'm sorry the news about Gloria isn't good. Poor soul, she has had such a battle but at least she has you there supporting her. xxx
     
  3. Saffie

    Saffie Registered User

    Mar 26, 2011
    22,504
    Female
    Near Southampton
    Happy Birthday Scarlet.You have many kind friends but I am sorry that Gloria's problems continue.
     
  4. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    Thank you for your kind wishes. There are many things that have been distressing with Gloria's illness, which has now lasted almost a year. Her weight loss is frightening, she has been bed-ridden since January, she's lost her hearing, her voice is a whisper, she's lost most of her hair.

    But when I arrived to find a stair lift had been fitted, to make it easier when she is transported to hospital (ambulance only, as she cannot get into a car any more), that shocked me. My once caring, vibrant friend is suffering so much and my heart breaks for her.

    I watched my darling John suffer for 12 years, and she was such a support to me, and to see another loved one suffer makes me so aware that my own little aches and pains are nothing. My lip has healed really well, and the scar is barely visible, and easily covered with my usual Crème Puff compressed powder!

    I have a check up today for my shoulder. I decided last year against the rotator cuff operation, and opted for physio, and I've stuck to the exercises, and that's worked very well.

    Much love to you all xxx
     
  5. Tiny1

    Tiny1 Registered User

    Apr 26, 2017
    35
    Wishing you well he will always be in your heart and never forgotten xx


    Sent from my iPad using Talking Point
     
  6. truth24

    truth24 Registered User

    Oct 13, 2013
    5,725
    North Somerset
    Sorry I missed your birthday, Scarlett, but so pleased you enjoyed it apart from your daughter. Perhaps at some stage in the future she will come to you, explain her actions, and apologise. So sorry to hear about Gloria too. Hugs. xx

    Sent from my SM-T813 using Talking Point mobile app
     
  7. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    I had the very best birthday present today. I visited Gloria, and for the first time since January, she was sitting downstairs. She is very thin, and very weak, having had 2 transfusions this week, but at least she was there, and alive.

    It was sheer joy to see her in a chair. :)
     
  8. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    13,551
    Ireland
    Glad to hear it, Scarlett. And how are YOU doing?
     
  9. truth24

    truth24 Registered User

    Oct 13, 2013
    5,725
    North Somerset
  10. Mal2

    Mal2 Registered User

    Oct 14, 2014
    2,968
    Enfield
    Good news about your friend, Scarlett. Sorry that you have had to go through this sad experience.

    Sorry I missed your birthday, pleased you had a good time. Take care. M xxx :)
     
  11. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    Thank you for your kind wishes. Alas, my joy was short lived as Gloria is back in hospital. More transfusions, and now concern about other things. My poor friend. And her man friend, who had an op for bowel cancer, and was waiting to hear when they could treat his liver cancer, has now been told it's terminal.

    I am feeling under the weather at the moment, because I have another abscess, lower jaw, the opposite side to the one I had last year, so at least I match. The Bank Holiday meant I couldn't see a dentist till yesterday, but was given antibiotics, and seeing her again on Friday, as the gum is too swollen to touch.

    But I did have a lovely couple of weeks of birthday celebrations. :) My ex-student, age 38, who I call my "toy boy", who takes me out several times a year, met me last week on Fenchurch Street Station, armed with 2 bouquets, and then took me on a boat trip on the Thames, with lunch, VIP seats at the front, and everybody on the boat sang Happy Birthday!

    After that we went to the Two Trees Hilton, for champagne, followed by a strawberry cocktail. Isn't that kind. I do have some wonderful friends. I've had so many lunches and dinners, I'm worn out, and I have a final treat in a couple of weeks, Afternoon Tea on a London Bus.
     

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  12. Saffie

    Saffie Registered User

    Mar 26, 2011
    22,504
    Female
    Near Southampton
    Lovely photo Scarlett. I am so sorry about your friend Gloria. x
     
  13. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    13,551
    Ireland
    Lovely pic, Scarlett, and you are looking very well!
     
  14. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    60,141
    Female
    Dundee
    Lovely photo Scarlett. Like you I have two friends who are very much younger than me. They never cease to surprise me with their kindness. It warms your heart. I'm glad your day was so good.
     
  15. Mal2

    Mal2 Registered User

    Oct 14, 2014
    2,968
    Enfield
    Sorry to hear your news of Gloria and her friend.

    Glad you enjoyed your birthday celebrations. Great photo. Take care. M xxx :)
     
  16. truth24

    truth24 Registered User

    Oct 13, 2013
    5,725
    North Somerset
    Sorry to hear about Gloria and her partner. That's such a shame. Hope your abscess is better now. Had to have a tooth out the day before my holiday, but at least the pain has gone. Lovely photo of you and your toyboy. Hope Gloria is improving again. xx
     
  17. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    Another month has passed - where does the time go. American Grand-daughter graduated last month, and English Grand-daughter has started driving lessons, as she's now 17. She still visits every week, and is a great help with the gardening jobs that need 3 hands, and her company is lovely.

    Gloria continues to lose weight, and starts her 6th chemo next week. For over a year she's been battling illness on so many fronts, and I spend as much time as I can with her. She is so brave and stoic, that I am full of admiration for her. Alas, she has lost her hearing, hair, feeling in her feet and strength in her voice - apparently side effects of her treatment.

    Two different neighbours, who both have a spouse with early dementia, have called on me, at different times, to ask my opinion about their spouses driving! I've said, as I always do, that I can only talk about our case, and that as soon as I aware that John wasn't looking one way at junctions, let alone both, I took his keys away.

    We've had some lovely weather, though I'm happiest when it's 70 - 73 degrees, with a breeze, than melting in the 90s! My 91 year old neighbour, who had AD, is now in a Home, and I wasn't surprised to see the droves of absent relatives descend on her place to clear it out.

    How is everyone? I hope you're all well. Best wishes to you xxx
     
  18. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    13,551
    Ireland
    Lovely to hear from you, Scarlett! So sad about your friend Gloria, she's fighting a very brave and hard battle. And she's very lucky to have such a staunch and fierce friend to fight with her.

    How are you? Has your lip completely healed?

    Wonderful to hear your granddaughter is still visiting regularly. And learning to drive! Goodness, it seems only yesterday when you were telling us about your 14 year old granddaughter!:eek: Soon, she will be quite independent!

    Do take care of yourself. And pop back in when you can, to give us your news. xx
     
  19. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    Had my 6th month checkup for my lip on Wednesday, and have now been discharged. The cancer has gone, and a weeny bit of makeup disguises the scar completely. Also had my 16th (!) mammogram 3 weeks ago, and received my All Clear letter today.

    My Breast Cancer was discovered on my 4th every-3-years mammogram, then they did another before the op, and one after, and I've had a yearly one for 10 years. Whether you are flat-chested, or well endowed, they are a painful experience! xxx
     
  20. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    13,551
    Ireland
    Excellent news. And yes, mammograms are rotten! I take a couple of solpadeine before going for one!
     

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