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Brother Is Worried About Me Sending The Will To The Probate Office

MaNaAk

Registered User
Jun 19, 2016
3,038
Essex
Hello Everyone and especially @DianeW,

I just want to say that after this morning's phone call I am putting more serious consideration on renting because he said that when probate comes through I am liable to pay rent to them but of course I don't see why I should do this if I am moving!

MaNaAk
 

Susan11

Registered User
Nov 18, 2018
2,576
Hello Everyone and especially @DianeW,

I just want to say that after this morning's phone call I am putting more serious consideration on renting because he said that when probate comes through I am liable to pay rent to them but of course I don't see why I should do this if I am moving!

MaNaAk
They are just so cruel. It's unbelievable. And after all it won't amount to much compared to the house. I am shell shocked!
Susan
 

MaNaAk

Registered User
Jun 19, 2016
3,038
Essex
He seems to say one thing one week and something else another week so I am spending the weekend looking at worst case scenarios but I am pleased to say that bearing in mind that I was diagnosed with mild/moderate anxiety/depression (which they don't know about) I am more relaxed than I was a few weeks ago because I know I can speak to the therapist and that I can make other arrangements. Meanwhile I must look at the flat above the old shop where I used to work...

MaNaAk
 

Bod

Registered User
Aug 30, 2013
1,353
Hello Everyone and especially @DianeW,

I just want to say that after this morning's phone call I am putting more serious consideration on renting because he said that when probate comes through I am liable to pay rent to them but of course I don't see why I should do this if I am moving!

MaNaAk

Thats fine!
You will of course be charging Caretaker rates, to the owners, whilst awaiting the sale.
Somebody will have to keep the premises secure.

Bod
 

Duggies-girl

Registered User
Sep 6, 2017
2,144
Oh for god's sake where do these people get their ideas from. My brother is moving into dads place next week rent free, it wouldn't occur to him to pay rent after all he will be buying the place when he can afford it after having installed a new bathroom suite and kitting the place out with new fitted wardrobes for the SIL's shoe collection etc. The fact that he doesn't own it yet has not registered with him, I am expected to just sit back and patiently wait, which I will of course because I am a complete walkover.

Just take heart @MaNaAk that you will soon be free of these money grasping family members and you have nothing to feel guilty about because you did your best for your dad and that is what counts. Their behaviour just shows them for the selfish people they are. I get quite cross about this and I know I am being walked over by my brother and the SIL but I will be rid of them soon and it can't come quick enough for me.

I think Bod means that you should charge them for having looked after your dads place all this time, after all they have done nothing, they just left it all to you.

Perhaps the flat over the shop will serve as a temporary stop gap until you find something permanent and it is possible that property prices may fall next year if the covid thing is still around which could put you in a better position to buy. It may not be as bad as it all appears hopefully.

I know it is had but try to stay positive.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
1,277
Southampton
MaNaAK i think they owe you all the time you looked after your dad, all the time you kept up the house and their freedom to do as they like. they are not going to get the money any quicker for the sale of the house than you can sell it.if you move out before the sell then will insurance be valid of the house and contents. at least if you rent, you wont have to pay repair bills, that will be up to the landlord.
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
2,987
South East
@duggies girl , how will your brother insure a home that isn’t legally his ? I think you are brave , my sibling would of moved in and never paid me my half that’s why I did what I did of changing locks and selling it privately .
@MaNaAk invoice your brothers for caretaking rates !
 

Bod

Registered User
Aug 30, 2013
1,353
Sorry @Bod.

I don't quite understand.

MaNaAk

Oh yes, if they try to charge you rent, you charge them caretaking rates to look after the building.
Which is incidently double the rent they could ask.

Bod
 

MaNaAk

Registered User
Jun 19, 2016
3,038
Essex
Thankyou everyone my brother's just sent an email of properties for me to look at. I'm going to attempt to enjoy lunch with my friends.

MaNaAk
 

Duggies-girl

Registered User
Sep 6, 2017
2,144
@duggies girl , how will your brother insure a home that isn’t legally his ? I think you are brave , my sibling would of moved in and never paid me my half that’s why I did what I did of changing locks and selling it privately .
@MaNaAk invoice your brothers for caretaking rates !

@Woo2 I ensured the house as executor and it will run out soon so they will have to get their own and I have just had all the meters read so they can pay the bills. They will pay me my half In November when they will have the money. Changing the locks would be so tempting but I have a niece and nephew who I would like to see again so I try to be civil. I will never go in the house again as I have no need to now and I want to remember it as dads place so I said goodbye to it last week.
 

Duggies-girl

Registered User
Sep 6, 2017
2,144
@Duggies-girl you are very brave.

MaNaAk

No @MaNaAk I am not brave, I just feel very worn down by it all so I need to just step back and try to concentrate on my own well being for a time. The last few years have been pretty awful really and I want to try to look ahead with some positive thoughts if covid allows me to. I am trying to remember all the good times with dad and put aside the not so good times

I need some recovery time as you probably do. If your brother mentions rent again, just tell him 'no' I think he has got a blooming cheek.
 

MaNaAk

Registered User
Jun 19, 2016
3,038
Essex
I know exactly how you feel being new to these things I am starting to understand how you feel the way your brother behaved and is behaving. Yes I am giving myself time to recover between each communication with my brothers and in reply to his email I said I would look at these properties but that I have only got half of my pupils back and that I am very stressed. I didn't mention anything about speaking to a therapist.

I'm going to enjoy lunch and aim for the vinegar not hand sanitiser.

MaNaAk
 

Melles Belles

Registered User
Jul 4, 2017
490
South east
You should send your brothers an invoice for you caring for your dad instead of paying for carers, and for your of earnings while you were doing the caring. That would dwarf any rent they seem to think you should pay.
They have more front than Brighton, and Brighton has a lot.
Fuming on your behalf.
 

MaNaAk

Registered User
Jun 19, 2016
3,038
Essex
I found that my email to my brother where I said 'I am keeping an eye on the property market all the time' didn't send I don't know whether this is a good thing or not and I don't know whether it's a good thing to have them look for me. I'm sorry to keep talking about them.

MaNaAk
 

lemonbalm

Registered User
May 21, 2018
885
If it would make you feel better to send that e-mail, then send it. It might help to make you feel more in control.

Is it possible that your brothers are trying to be helpful by looking for you 🤔????? I'm horrified that they are even considering asking you for rent while you are looking. Shame on them.

Any treats in store for you today?
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
1,277
Southampton
sure your brothers have ultimate motive of getting you out quicker but they will have to wait until it sales so doesnt matter how quick you find something its takes its own time. your brothers need patience.