Best Interests Meeting Query

[Frankie147]

It was my partners Best Interests meeting yesterday, the whole meeting only lasted about 15 minutes, maybe 20 minutes at the most.
There was 7 people around the table and another 2 on line. We all went round the table to say who we were and our role in my partners care. He has been in hospital for almost a year.
It was very hard for my partner as he doesn’t really understand that he is struggling with dementia issues, I could see the panic/fear in his eyes I stopped so i could try and reassure him that he was ok and we were all there to try and help and support him,but the meeting was ended just a few minutes later. The only thing that was mainly discussed was between myself and the social worker in reference to the type of care home and location of it.
I was expecting a bit more than this from the meeting, but it may of been cut short because of my partners reaction, I don’t know. I did speak to one of the nurses afterwards very briefly and have arranged to go back next week to have a catch up with her, what has been other people’s reaction to Best Interest meetings?

 

[canary]

My mum had a Best Interest meeting following 6 weeks in a care home for assessment/reablement (often called Discharge to Access - D2A) after a spell in hospital due to a TIA. The decision to be made was whether she would be be able to return home with a care package.

There were about the same number of people there - the care home manager, mums GP, a SW, an OT, mum and me. A lot of it was the care home manager outlining her needs while she had been there. I said I was worried about her going home because I was unable to be with her all the time (my OH was developing symptoms too) and she often would not let me in the house. I explained some of the things that had been happening, including that the neighbours had told me that she was going outside, very inadequately dressed, and banging on their doors in the early hours of the morning because she was lost. The manager confirmed that mum was up during the night demanding that she be let out. The GP pointed out that mum had been underweight and very dehydrated at the point of admission, There was quite a lot of discussion about whether mum would accept carers - I said that I didnt think she would.

All of this was going over mums head. I dont think she had any idea what was going on at all. Eventually the SW said to mum "Dont you want to go home?" and I could have slapped her (the SW), but mum just looked at her blankly and said "I thought this was my home". After this it all ended quite quickly. I asked the care home manager whether mum could remain there and the manager said that she could and that she thought mum would fit in very well. Everyone was in agreement that mum should stay there permanently and that was that. It lasted about 20 mins.

 

[Shedrech]

hi @Frankie147
it sounds to me that the meeting was necessary to sign off on the fact that everyone agreed that a move to residential care is clearly now in your partner's best interests, and given your partners response it was best to keep the proceedings as brief as possible
I hope the catch-up with the nurse is helpful

 

[Frankie147]

Thank you for your replies, they have helped to reassure me as I had been expecting a bit more of a discussion, I will catch up more with the nurse next week