Thank you all.
I know this should have been expected, but my poor Chrissie had done so well of late. I am not given to crying, yet tears keep coming for no obvious reason other than I miss her so very much. She was my life. All I did and wanted to do was for her. I love her dearly yet feel I have failed. I could not keep her alive, yet I can see nothing else I could do. That does not help. Nothing else in life matters to me, but I will just have to try and go on, moment by moment, I can't manage day by day. Family are now with her to view and watch the coffin sealed. I may have been an undertaker, but for my lovely Chrissie I could not do that. She is no longer there, she is at peace, I believe with the Lord. No more to suffer each day and have confusion and fear. But as well as failure to her as a carer, I am selfish and want her here so very much.