Mum is REALLY struggling with money now. We have agreed how much she is suppposed to give me each week (40pounds) half the time she forgets and if I remind her she says she is sure she has given me it. Or she will go on about not realising she is supposed to give me that much each week even though I have written it all in a book for her. I always sign the calendar when she pays me so I can keep track of where we are moneywise. When we moved in we took out a mortgage that was bigger than our old one so money is tight. If she needs to go to the bank I have to go too because she can not use her pin code etc, and gets very confused.
On Monday we went to the bank as we are going away this week, she wanted to get some money. The first probelms was that she has lost her bankcard again so we had to request another (U must speend at least 2 hours a week looking for that damned card, and she has taken to putting everything in "safe places" and never the ones we have agreed. Anywa today she asked me for the money we got our on Monday I was 99% sure I gave it her when we got home (she likes me to carry it hone just in case). I searched the old laindry etc and could not think what I had done though in my mind I knew I had handed it over. I searched our part of the house for nearly an hour then went into her annexe and starting searching there. All the time I am telling her I am sure I handed it over and is can she think where he may have put in etc! Needless to say there were several small bundles of money, some in old five pound notes! Eventually we found the money and I know it was the right money as where she had lost her bank card we had taken her last bank statement to the bank and that was wrapped around it. She said she could not understand how it had got there as she knew she hadn't put it there.
Now I know this is common and I've begged her to let me take on her finances but she says that would make her seem like a child. We have an enduring power of attorney set up, but I feel so bad about actioning it against her will.
It breaks my heart facing accusations all the time, and the fact that the other members of my family are not in good health either doens't help. My lad is recovering for an operation he had less than two weeks ago and I just don't need and can't really cope with this aggro.
I love Mum, and I know she loves me, but we keep ending up in tears because of this damned condition - any ideas welcome . Thanks
On Monday we went to the bank as we are going away this week, she wanted to get some money. The first probelms was that she has lost her bankcard again so we had to request another (U must speend at least 2 hours a week looking for that damned card, and she has taken to putting everything in "safe places" and never the ones we have agreed. Anywa today she asked me for the money we got our on Monday I was 99% sure I gave it her when we got home (she likes me to carry it hone just in case). I searched the old laindry etc and could not think what I had done though in my mind I knew I had handed it over. I searched our part of the house for nearly an hour then went into her annexe and starting searching there. All the time I am telling her I am sure I handed it over and is can she think where he may have put in etc! Needless to say there were several small bundles of money, some in old five pound notes! Eventually we found the money and I know it was the right money as where she had lost her bank card we had taken her last bank statement to the bank and that was wrapped around it. She said she could not understand how it had got there as she knew she hadn't put it there.
Now I know this is common and I've begged her to let me take on her finances but she says that would make her seem like a child. We have an enduring power of attorney set up, but I feel so bad about actioning it against her will.
It breaks my heart facing accusations all the time, and the fact that the other members of my family are not in good health either doens't help. My lad is recovering for an operation he had less than two weeks ago and I just don't need and can't really cope with this aggro.
I love Mum, and I know she loves me, but we keep ending up in tears because of this damned condition - any ideas welcome . Thanks