Good evening,
I would be very grateful if you could offer advice, or point me in the right direction to someone who could.
My mum is 74 years old. She has lived on her own for the past two years since my father died.
She is fully independent, doing all of her own shopping, cleaning house work etc.
Over the last year or so she has become more and more forgetful, and now regularly forgets the words for everyday objects.
As this has progressed she has started to lose things on a regular basis. The blame for the misplaced items started out as a casual blaming of me for entering her house and hiding her missing items. This has now progressed to mum being convinced that I either break into her house while she isn’t there, or stand at the bottom of her bed while she is asleep, trying to strangle her.
I have tried to reason with mum and reassure her that this didn’t happen, but by the look on her face she truly believes it to be fact.
Over the last week or so this has further progressed to mum throwing away most of her food as someone is trying to make her poorly, and locking herself inside the house and hiding the keys so no one can enter her property.
These accusations are delivered with much shouting and swearing which is very much out of character for mum, she also regularly severs contact with me, again very out of character.
A Few of these examples include.
Accused of greasing the hinges and latch to mum's side gate while she was out, and accused of leaving too much grease on the catch which got all over her hands.
Three phone calls from mum accusing me of entering her house and stealing all of her pain killers. A further phone call later that evening to apologize, the tablets had been found.
Mum had visited ASDA to purchase new cutlery. Accused of entering mums house while she went to the toilet and hiding her new cutlery, when she went back upstairs mum feels I returned to her house, but this time swapped the cutlery set for one she didn’t like.
Accused of entering her shed and using all of her white gloss paint and putting her paint brushes back without cleaning them.
Accused of entering her bedroom while she was asleep and stealing her towels, then going downstairs and stealing her brush from under the sink.
Accused of stealing her toothbrush, when she goes to bed it’s there, yet when she gets up it’s gone. Mum told me she will cut contact with me if I keep breaking into her house and hiding her things.
Accused of stealing all of mums shoes, she asked if I could return the pairs I wasn’t wearing.
Mum asked why I keep breaking into her house and standing over her while she’s asleep.
Visited mum. Mum was unable to find any keys to unlock her windows, she told the story of how I had entered her house to steal these.
Mum also relayed the story of how I had been shouting at her this morning, and then entered her house to close all of the doors and windows so she couldn’t get back inside.
Mum showed me her sideboard, which appears to be nearly empty, she feels that I keep going into this cupboard and throwing things away.
Mum told me I was now banned from her house and could only speak to her through a window. This was because of all the things I’m stealing from her house.
Had two sets of spare keys cut for both the front and back doors for mum. Delivered and checked the keys, attached key fobs to each key and showed mum they worked.
Mum rang an hour later. She felt that I had entered her house, swapped all of her spare keys and locked her in the house.
As we are now, mum has gone “no contact” again, refusing to answer the door or phone.
I would be very grateful if you could advise on anything I can do to try ensure mums safety.
Many thanks
Andy.
I would be very grateful if you could offer advice, or point me in the right direction to someone who could.
My mum is 74 years old. She has lived on her own for the past two years since my father died.
She is fully independent, doing all of her own shopping, cleaning house work etc.
Over the last year or so she has become more and more forgetful, and now regularly forgets the words for everyday objects.
As this has progressed she has started to lose things on a regular basis. The blame for the misplaced items started out as a casual blaming of me for entering her house and hiding her missing items. This has now progressed to mum being convinced that I either break into her house while she isn’t there, or stand at the bottom of her bed while she is asleep, trying to strangle her.
I have tried to reason with mum and reassure her that this didn’t happen, but by the look on her face she truly believes it to be fact.
Over the last week or so this has further progressed to mum throwing away most of her food as someone is trying to make her poorly, and locking herself inside the house and hiding the keys so no one can enter her property.
These accusations are delivered with much shouting and swearing which is very much out of character for mum, she also regularly severs contact with me, again very out of character.
A Few of these examples include.
Accused of greasing the hinges and latch to mum's side gate while she was out, and accused of leaving too much grease on the catch which got all over her hands.
Three phone calls from mum accusing me of entering her house and stealing all of her pain killers. A further phone call later that evening to apologize, the tablets had been found.
Mum had visited ASDA to purchase new cutlery. Accused of entering mums house while she went to the toilet and hiding her new cutlery, when she went back upstairs mum feels I returned to her house, but this time swapped the cutlery set for one she didn’t like.
Accused of entering her shed and using all of her white gloss paint and putting her paint brushes back without cleaning them.
Accused of entering her bedroom while she was asleep and stealing her towels, then going downstairs and stealing her brush from under the sink.
Accused of stealing her toothbrush, when she goes to bed it’s there, yet when she gets up it’s gone. Mum told me she will cut contact with me if I keep breaking into her house and hiding her things.
Accused of stealing all of mums shoes, she asked if I could return the pairs I wasn’t wearing.
Mum asked why I keep breaking into her house and standing over her while she’s asleep.
Visited mum. Mum was unable to find any keys to unlock her windows, she told the story of how I had entered her house to steal these.
Mum also relayed the story of how I had been shouting at her this morning, and then entered her house to close all of the doors and windows so she couldn’t get back inside.
Mum showed me her sideboard, which appears to be nearly empty, she feels that I keep going into this cupboard and throwing things away.
Mum told me I was now banned from her house and could only speak to her through a window. This was because of all the things I’m stealing from her house.
Had two sets of spare keys cut for both the front and back doors for mum. Delivered and checked the keys, attached key fobs to each key and showed mum they worked.
Mum rang an hour later. She felt that I had entered her house, swapped all of her spare keys and locked her in the house.
As we are now, mum has gone “no contact” again, refusing to answer the door or phone.
I would be very grateful if you could advise on anything I can do to try ensure mums safety.
Many thanks
Andy.