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assessment

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
956
Southampton
i am finally getting a care and support assessment and im a bit worried whats going to happen. is there any advice about what happens questions and how i need to answer. usually i would do a total spring clean but i cant so other than a hoover i will have to leave it more or less alone. its only a bit of dust but my anxiety levels are going to go through the roof. but thats what she is there for because i need help due a degenerative spine that is irritating the nerve so back down through leg. there is a deficit on that side. i havent heard from pain management yet so pain is not managed at all. any advice gratefully recieved thankyou jenny
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
63,054
69
Dundee
I’m glad you’re getting the assessment @jennifer1967.

I don’t know if this link will be of any help to you -


I think the best thing to do is to be completely honest and give them answers which paint the worse case scenario. Don‘t hold back. You need to tell them how bad things are for you.
 

Vic10

Registered User
Feb 18, 2017
172
Oh, Jennifer 1967, I know just how you feel as I am about to go through same thing. Something of a crisis going on at the moment. Have bed in nursing care hopefully to get over this but needs Covid test first and I’m fearful it may not happen if we go into lockdown. Stressed doesn’t come close to cover it!
Hugs from me. Hope all goes well.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
956
Southampton
he wont be going anywhere but i need the help. hope all goes well with you as well try not to stressed as im trying not to just another hurdle in the grand national, beechers brook proportions
 

Gorgeous Gail

Registered User
Apr 17, 2020
74
Hi @jennifer1967 is it the carers assessment you are having? I had mine on Thursday. She didn't come to the house, she did it over the phone due to the dreaded virus!! One of the questions that she asked me was if I am still able to keep the house to the standards that I want whilst also looking after my OH so that is one of the questions which you would answer 'no' to. You need to be really honest with them and also on the very worst day that you experience with your OH and once they have all the answers they can assess what help you need. My OH also had a needs assessment the week before, where they asked him what he could and couldn't do and then assessed what help/care he needs. I hope this helps and good luck with the assessment.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
71,964
Kent
I agree.

There is no need to dress the shop window, the assessor needs to know how difficult life is for you @jennifer1967

Whether they see the dust on a home visit or hear the anxiety and tiredness in your voice during a phone call, there is no point in an assessment if the truth is hidden.

No one is a mind reader and if you can tell it how it is you are most likely to get the help you need.

Good luck.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
956
Southampton
thankyou both she is actually coming to my home as im not very mobile and they couldnt find my telephone number nobody gave it to them so they are coming to me as it was marked urgent. i dont know how long it would have been if not its taken 8 wks. but im grateful. she can see the dust etc hoover needed because i will make sure i dont do it. pride has made me do it but not for her anxiety levels will be through the roof anyway. ive just cleaned the oven as a repair man coming to fix it and im in absolute agony. its a care and support assessment for me is that the same thing?thankyou what would i do without you and the forum jenny
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
956
Southampton
well so much for that. i could be on my knees and they still wont help me the council havent got the money for someone like me cant do any domestics and could go in 2-3 times a week to shower my husband which doesnt give anything as i will still be caring for all the other days so whats the point and have to pay for the pleasure when on benefits because we cant get other benefits due to the age gap marriage. i hate the system it doesnt work for me and will take a crisis. isnt 2 overdoses crisis enough? but no i need a proper job before its a crisis. should have done it properly in the first place rather than making a mess of it. nobody seems to care.it doesnt seem to matter that im overdosing on painkillers as well as a morphine patch on a daily basis so yes i can walk around the house but not been out for 10 wks and then got to care for my husband who has very poor memory and gets confused, leaves the cooker on but as long as he can walk doesnt need help. it isnt fair
 
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lemonbalm

Registered User
May 21, 2018
696
I'm sorry to hear the assessment was so disappointing @jennifer1967 . I don't know my way around the system but I expect other members will have useful advice. Don't despair. Hang in there.
 

Starting on a journey

Registered User
Jul 9, 2019
440
@jennifer1967 what a bad thing to happen. Don’t do anything to yourself, ring your mental health team for help ...you must have a crisis team ....failing that ring the GP, ring 111, ring the Samaritans. Please please please
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
956
Southampton
@jennifer1967 what a bad thing to happen. Don’t do anything to yourself, ring your mental health team for help ...you must have a crisis team ....failing that ring the GP, ring 111, ring the Samaritans. Please please please
im ok i have to take all those painkillers to live any life .alz soc are supporting me locally by repeatedly chasing things up. they are not listening. apparently my husband is too mobile. his memory and confusion dont matter im here sorry to frighten you just how i feel. im so down and want some help but they are not listening. thankyou to forum and workers they have been the only source of support.dont have mental health team or crisis team not even a social worker which is why i feel so alone.
 

lemonbalm

Registered User
May 21, 2018
696
You're not alone @jennifer1967 .You have all of us on here. We need you on the forum! We will all try to lift your spirits and come up with some practical things to help you along.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
71,964
Kent
I`m sorry you`re not getting the help you need @jennifer1967.

I think back pain is like dementia. It can`t be understood by many many people unless it`s been experienced.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
956
Southampton
I`m sorry you`re not getting the help you need @jennifer1967.

I think back pain is like dementia. It can`t be understood by many many people unless it`s been experienced.
it was actually an assessment for care for me but turned into for my husband as they couldnt put a care package for me and my husband is too mobile and independent although she didnt see his memory that hes confused and now has virtigo cant use shower because of it so i carry on its not just back ache because its the sciatic nerve it goes all the way down my right leg nobody listens except the forum and local alz soc who has been so good and has kept chasing. she has told me im getting an injection. not officially been told or when
 

Jan L

Registered User
Mar 26, 2020
51
Oh @jennifer1967 I am so sorry to read that the assessment didn't go well and you can't get the help you so desperately need. Others have made sensible suggestions which you must follow up and I wish you well in your endeavour to get the help you need. It is of no consolation to you but I am in very much the same situation, don't know where to get help, other than pay an exorbitant amount of money. I am trapped in the house with him 24/7 and only getting 2/3 hours of broken sleep per night, but they think I sound a strong person and am coping very well. How little they know, I just wonder what will happen when I am ill and not able to cope. I don't want him to go in a home but I do need support to look after him at home. Take care of yourself as best you can.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
956
Southampton
Oh @jennifer1967 I am so sorry to read that the assessment didn't go well and you can't get the help you so desperately need. Others have made sensible suggestions which you must follow up and I wish you well in your endeavour to get the help you need. It is of no consolation to you but I am in very much the same situation, don't know where to get help, other than pay an exorbitant amount of money. I am trapped in the house with him 24/7 and only getting 2/3 hours of broken sleep per night, but they think I sound a strong person and am coping very well. How little they know, I just wonder what will happen when I am ill and not able to cope. I don't want him to go in a home but I do need support to look after him at home. Take care of yourself as best you can.
it actually wasnt just my husband, apparently he is too mobile, his memory is awful, i do his tablets inhalers hes got copd as well make sure is clean, clean clothes now he has vertigo as well which makes him dizzy as well and had a couple of falls he has to do exercises to see if they can balance the inner ear. but the problem is i have a degenerating spine thast is irritating the sciatic nerve so im in constant pain in the right side of my back and all down my right leg. i was coping before that happened but im on constant painkillers and still trying to do everything including all housework and was doing mowing the lawn as well but have had to give that up. i have a morphine patch as well and waiting for an injection in my spine. if it was only my husband id manage but its the serious pain thats making the job nearly impossible.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
956
Southampton
You're not alone @jennifer1967 .You have all of us on here. We need you on the forum! We will all try to lift your spirits and come up with some practical things to help you along.
thankyou lemonbalm i appreciate that the forum and you and the other members have got me through so much, especially twice that ive been in hospital. nothing has changed since then and am still struggling but unless i put a neon sign up, they dont listen. im tired of fighting and not getting anywhere. im just tired with all the painkillers i have to take to get through the day.